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Original poster

Advice please regarding an awkward customer

110 replies

Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 20:09

I'll try to to keep this as short as possible.

I have a small business on eBay. A buyer bought a fabric and wanted to return it. eBay issued return label, she sent it back. I had to pay the return postage because she stated that I sent the wrong fabric (I didn't but that is another story). But what I received back wasn't my fabric but a bunch of remnants. eBay is pretty useless in such cases. They refunded her because basically I can't prove it was the wrong fabric.

Well, she messaged me on Wednesday that there was a mixup at the post office and I have received the fabric that was supposed to go to her tailor and the tailor has received mine. She wants her fabric back obviously. First thing she asked was if I can send it back, she'll refund me the postage and the tailor sends me my fabric. I told her that's not going to work. I am not paying anything and I want my fabric back first before I return hers.

She now send me another message with a screenshot of two labels. Collection booked for tomorrow and if I am available. The tailor will send my fabric out tomorrow as well.

I have several problems with that: RM collects usually between 9 and 11 but not reliably and I am busy in the mornings, in and out. My husband is away for the week. I'd rather she sends me the label and I drop it off when it's convenient for me.
Another thing, I have no guarantee that my fabric will be sent off, she could as well cancel the label and keep the fabric.

Lastly, the weight is wrong, both parcels are over 2kg. She paid only for a small parcel. Even if I get my parcel back, I might have to pay a fee for insufficient postage.

This is really doing my head in. What would you do?

OP posts:
Santaiswashinghissleigh · 08/12/2023 20:13

Just insist you get your parcel back first and a paid for label for hers..

HunterHearstHelmsley · 08/12/2023 20:16

I'd do nothing. Well, I'd block her so she couldn't buy from you again but other than that, I'd do nothing. She's had a refund, I'd leave it at that.

Unless the fabric was expensive and you're very out of pocket. In that case, I'd advise her you'd deal with it once your fabric has been received.

Original poster
Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 20:28

@Santaiswashinghissleigh and @HunterHearstHelmsley

Thank you, I was really starting to think I am making unreasonable demands.
She is already blocked on eBay but got my phone number from my business details. If she really wants her fabric back, I'll insist on getting mine back first.

OP posts:
GrumpyOldCrone · 08/12/2023 20:31

HunterHearstHelmsley · 08/12/2023 20:16

I'd do nothing. Well, I'd block her so she couldn't buy from you again but other than that, I'd do nothing. She's had a refund, I'd leave it at that.

Unless the fabric was expensive and you're very out of pocket. In that case, I'd advise her you'd deal with it once your fabric has been received.

This!

Hatty65 · 08/12/2023 20:31

Well if I were you I'd send her a bunch of random offcuts of the worst fabric you can find (in her prepaid label) and insist that is what you had been sent...

It's a win if you actually get your own fabric back. And its a petty revenge if you don't.

WelshFionaThePlasticSurgeryGorgon · 08/12/2023 20:32

I don't know what has happened with people on E Bay. I have used for years and had no problems. Now I have a woman who is extremely rude claiming that something I sent her was broken. It most definitely was not and couldn't have been during transport. I have said I will refund her when I get the item back but as yet no item. Last night I get a message again " still waiting on a refund". Her messages have been so rude and aggressive.

NigelHarmansNewWife · 08/12/2023 20:39

In that case WelshFiona speak to eBay before your arsehole buyer contacts them.

Original poster
Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 21:05

Hatty65 · 08/12/2023 20:31

Well if I were you I'd send her a bunch of random offcuts of the worst fabric you can find (in her prepaid label) and insist that is what you had been sent...

It's a win if you actually get your own fabric back. And its a petty revenge if you don't.

That cheered me right up 😂 thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 21:13

WelshFionaThePlasticSurgeryGorgon · 08/12/2023 20:32

I don't know what has happened with people on E Bay. I have used for years and had no problems. Now I have a woman who is extremely rude claiming that something I sent her was broken. It most definitely was not and couldn't have been during transport. I have said I will refund her when I get the item back but as yet no item. Last night I get a message again " still waiting on a refund". Her messages have been so rude and aggressive.

As a seller you can't really win on eBay. I've got the really helpful tip from the advisor that refused my appeal to 'just adjust my prices to compensate for the odd return that goes wrong'. eBay won't help if things go pear shaped.

OP posts:
Original poster
Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 21:27

I have an update: She now told me that it will be theft if I don't send her back her fabric tomorrow. Honestly, she can keep mine now, it's getting silly.

OP posts:
PlipPlopChoo · 08/12/2023 21:54

Nah fuck her. She made a mistake so she needs to work on your terms.

Tell her that you will return her fabric once you have yours back and she has paid for postage of her fabric.

Seeing as she has your address anyway suggest that she is welcome to turn up and do the swap in person.

Make sure you block her from any future purchases as soon as possible.

Sunandnomoon · 08/12/2023 22:00

I’d tell her you’re not exchanging the fabric then block/hang up on all future contact from her. It doesn’t sound like it’s worth the hassle and you’ll be kicking yourself if you end up further out of pocket.

Justfinking · 08/12/2023 22:06

Santaiswashinghissleigh · 08/12/2023 20:13

Just insist you get your parcel back first and a paid for label for hers..

This. Don't send her anything until you get what you want back.

GrumpyOldCrone · 08/12/2023 22:07

Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 21:27

I have an update: She now told me that it will be theft if I don't send her back her fabric tomorrow. Honestly, she can keep mine now, it's getting silly.

Wow. Maybe trying to intimidate people has worked for her before. Horrible woman. I like the advice to block her on all possible channels. Sounds sensible to me.

MandyMotherOfBrian · 08/12/2023 22:11

Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 21:27

I have an update: She now told me that it will be theft if I don't send her back her fabric tomorrow. Honestly, she can keep mine now, it's getting silly.

You now need to report her to eBay. Use the content of the emails to show them she has admitted she has not sent you the fabric that they made you refund for.

CatOnAMushroom · 08/12/2023 22:12

Ebay is a nightmare now. I am having to fund return postage for an item of clothing I sold because the buyer claims its the wrong size to the size I advertised. It isn't and the label proves it. I.e. small size and the label says S!!!! EBay help were "ebay not going to help at all" and I have to pay to return it.

I love the idea of sending random fabrics however if it is a genuine mix up I guess it's not the buyers fault either

Original poster
Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 22:22

CatOnAMushroom · 08/12/2023 22:12

Ebay is a nightmare now. I am having to fund return postage for an item of clothing I sold because the buyer claims its the wrong size to the size I advertised. It isn't and the label proves it. I.e. small size and the label says S!!!! EBay help were "ebay not going to help at all" and I have to pay to return it.

I love the idea of sending random fabrics however if it is a genuine mix up I guess it's not the buyers fault either

That's how it started. She basically abused the return system to get out of paying for the return. After that she lost a lot of my goodwill.
I believe her when she says it was a mixup and I am not refusing to return it but I want my fabric back first. It's a stalemate really.

OP posts:
OooohAhhhh · 08/12/2023 22:44

Just don't do anything. block & move on. It's her problem not yours.

OnionOnionH · 08/12/2023 22:58

I’d insist she returns your fabric and provides a postage label for her stuff, repeat she needs to return it a few times and then explain you will not engage anymore.
Some people are bonkers on EBay and I’d be worried she could set up a different account to mess your business up, so I wouldn’t antagonise her too much.

GreatGateauxsby · 08/12/2023 23:01

Santaiswashinghissleigh · 08/12/2023 20:13

Just insist you get your parcel back first and a paid for label for hers..

This if you are feeling generous.

otherwise ignore it and block her so you never have to deal with her again

what a dick. The world must be a difficult place for people like this.

PlipPlopChoo · 09/12/2023 06:44

I love the idea of sending random fabrics however if it is a genuine mix up I guess it's not the buyers fault either

What kind of mix up could this be? I cannot how the post office can be at fault here despite her trying to pass the buck.

She must have stuck the wrong labels on the wrong packages.

Justfinking · 09/12/2023 06:47

Rhombus79 · 08/12/2023 22:22

That's how it started. She basically abused the return system to get out of paying for the return. After that she lost a lot of my goodwill.
I believe her when she says it was a mixup and I am not refusing to return it but I want my fabric back first. It's a stalemate really.

Show quote history

Definitely don't be out of pocket, she's proved she's dishonest. I'd actually be asking for her to reimburse you for the other postage too. Karma is a b*tch. That would be the kind thing to do, but if you're not bothered, just block and move on.

FloofCloud · 09/12/2023 07:01

Ignore her empty threats, tell her you're not able to be in for RM tomorrow but you'll send as soon as you get your fabric back - does she have a significant amount of your fabric?

GallbladderWoes · 09/12/2023 07:16

Hello OP I work for a business seller on eBay and deal with this stuff all the time.
Firstly are you a business seller? If so, when it went to a case, did you get the option for eBay to step in, and this is where they wouldn't help?

Secondly I'd do what someone else suggested and I'd contact eBay with all the proof and I'd keep at them until they sort it!

With regards to returning her stuff, you stand your ground, she's had a bloody refund and you're the one now with nothing but scraps, so to speak! The bare faced cheek of her saying it's theft if you don't return it. She's had a refund AND got the fabric.

People are awful!!!

Original poster
Rhombus79 · 09/12/2023 07:19

FloofCloud · 09/12/2023 07:01

Ignore her empty threats, tell her you're not able to be in for RM tomorrow but you'll send as soon as you get your fabric back - does she have a significant amount of your fabric?

I have told her just that.
She doesn't have a lot of my fabric, it's only a 2m piece of upholstery fabric. It's really silly to squabble about that but it's more about the principle now. I didn't even get an apology for the whole debacle.

OP posts:
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