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Original poster

How long were you with DH/DP before babies came along?

119 replies

tryingforasunshine · 07/12/2023 19:05

Wondering what the average is. If you could, would you change it and try sooner, or have more time as a couple?

OP posts:
Roselilly36 · 07/12/2023 19:08

11 years, through choice, but if I knew how lovely is it to have our boys, I would have had them a little earlier.

2chocolateoranges · 07/12/2023 19:10

Eldest was born 6years after we got together.

I was only 19 when we got together so 6years was a good amount of time to be together, date,get married and have our own home before having babies.

Auntieobem · 07/12/2023 19:12

10 years, by choice.

InTheRainOnATrain · 07/12/2023 19:12

9 years but we met at uni! I would expect that you would be in more of a hurry if you meet in your 30s versus in your teens.

Wtafis · 07/12/2023 19:13

10 years
started trying at 8 years

grayhairdontcare · 07/12/2023 19:14

4 yrs for dd1
6 yrs dd2

Thethruththewholetruth · 07/12/2023 19:14

A year, so pregnant after 4 ish months, it was an accident that I regret. (Not DD she’s amazing) We divorced. I am married again and it’s so much better. I couldn’t have children with this DH due to me having a hysterectomy at 30 and I am immensely sad about it, DH is an amazing dad to DD, I wish would could have had another. DD’s dad is a massive bellend that hasn’t bothered with her since she was 5, so if I’d waited I’d have figured out he was a waste of space and full of shite basically!!

BurbageBrook · 07/12/2023 19:15

3.5 years.

Mumof1andacat · 07/12/2023 19:15

10 years. Got together at 18, married at 24 and baby at 28. Wanted to be married with a house before having a baby.

wishing3 · 07/12/2023 19:15

3 years after we met first child born. But we were old! Would have been nice to both have met earlier to have had more time to do couple stuff eg travel without kids, have a child free
nin-knackered wedding, a honeymoon… also would have been nice to be younger when having kids. But of course am grateful for kids

JaninaDuszejko · 07/12/2023 19:15

We were married 7 years before we had DD1 (and had been together for 5 years before that). Very glad we'd had so much time together prechildren, I found the baby years very hard and I think it helped us get through it. Kids are teenagers now and much easier.

pinkfonie · 07/12/2023 19:15

8 nearly 9 years

HamsterBanana · 07/12/2023 19:16

3 years.

CMOTDibbler · 07/12/2023 19:17

13 years

Rolla23 · 07/12/2023 19:17

6 months.. but obviously they were born 9 months later. Still together 20 years later!

Xmasfairy86 · 07/12/2023 19:17

3 years. I would have loved longer as just us looking back.

I was only 22 when I fell pregnant. If I’d of known then what I know now I either wouldn’t have had children, or would have waited (knowing it wasn’t an issue to conceive). My kids are great an all but I could have lived just fine without them!

Heartbreaktuna · 07/12/2023 19:18

10 years by choice. We got together at 23, married at 25, lived abroad until 30. Had DS at 33. We wanted to live and grow as a couple before having our son. Best decision for us.

Inmydreams88 · 07/12/2023 19:18

15 years. Met at 19 and having first baby now at 34. Our choice, we were too busy going on nice holidays, saving for our wedding and house deposit etc

albaalba351 · 07/12/2023 19:18

I met my partner at school - and have been with him for 12 years. I've just turned 30 and we are going to start trying within the next year - so it will hopefully be 13 years of being together.

TedLasto · 07/12/2023 19:19

7 years, I liked having that amount of time together pre-kids but then equally wish I’d started earlier purely because I was quite old before having children and I’d like more time with them. But I didn’t think I wanted any and was busy having a great time!

Wibblywobblylikejelly · 07/12/2023 19:19

I was 6 months pregnant on our 1 year anniversary....
Which wasn't really our anniversary as it was just the first day we started sleeping together but it made it sound better.

I wouldn't change anything. It's certainly been a journey but it's turned out perfectly and I wouldn't choose anyone else to be my husband and our kids father.

cornflower21 · 07/12/2023 19:20

7 years.
Met when 17 and 19.

Raggeo · 07/12/2023 19:20

We were together 4.5 years,married for 1. We were in our 30s and wanted to be married before having kids.

princesspeppax · 07/12/2023 19:20

5 years

Umph · 07/12/2023 19:20

We’d known each other 7 years and been casually ‘on and off’ hooking up for most of that time. We’d been ‘officially together’ for 2.5 years, and got married whilst I was pregnant. We’d always known we were meant for each other. Eldest is 5 now, youngest is 3 it’s worked out perfectly. (Worth saying we’re relatively ‘young’ - DS came along when we were in our late 20s so there was no rush)