How many siblings do you have and has that been a positive or negative for you?

[Whatsgoingonwithmyhead]

I’ll start.

2 siblings, all very close in age

Growing up we didn’t play together loads and certainly from age 8/9 onwards we just played with our own school friends and I didn't interact with my siblings much.
(This was party probably influenced by the fact my parents didn’t do stuff to help us bond, e.g. we didn’t really go on family holidays or have shared hobbies or interests)

Money was quite tight with three kids in the house so I didn’t get to do stuff I would have liked e.g. I was desperate to do ice-skating as a child but my parents couldn’t afford it / manage the logistics so I didn’t get to do it.

As an adult my sister has mental health issues and is hugely reliant on my mum, meaning I never get to spend any time with my mum without my sister (they live together and mum refuses to leave sister home alone to come and visit me, I now live the other side of the country so it’s an overnight trip). So it’s massively impacted my relationship with my mum & not in a good way.

My younger brother moved far away and does his own thing / isn’t very communicative so I don’t have much to do with him at all, although he’s pleasant enough.

So overall although my siblings are good people, I don’t understand at all when people say a child needs siblings.

4 siblings. 1 in and out of jail since a teen and I haven't seen them in over 10 years. 2 others move abroad as soon as they could in their 20's, I haven't seen either of them in about 5 years. Another who lives with parents and I haven't seen them in years. Our mum used to fight us all of against each other, so the family is very splintered.

I can't say I benefitted at all with having siblings, we were all raised to hate each other!

I have one of each. My brother is the goldenchild as is my sister and I am the scapegoat child so it has been a horrendous negative in my life. They undermine me and minimise everything I do, lie about me, to me, its awful.

I have 2. We get on ok some of the time but I doubt we'd ever class ourselves as "friends". The only thing we really had in common were our parents.

I have only one sibling who is 19 years old than me so I was effectively brought up as an only child. I lived in a village and had lots of play mates so I didn't feel at all bereft. I also felt very fortunate when my friends were made to bring their younger siblings out to play. It was always a pain in the bum for them. My late DH had two siblings with whom he was friendly but I wouldn't say any of them had a special bond. Money was always an issue when he was growing up because there were three kids.

I'm one of 7. I'm the oldest. Negative.
Not enough money due to father's drinking and frittering.
Mother likes babies- children over 5, not so much. She also prefers boys.
I'm the only one of us who has children and I'm only having one.

I don't think you can say how much better/worse your life would be generally with or without siblings.

I mean, things like df found decisions when his Mum was ill and brother was not always contactable (in the army, and at the time on the ground in the Gulf war) very difficult. The second time he had to make those decisions his brother was around and it took so much of the burden off him just not having to do it all on his own. He didn't realise until the second time what a relief it was to be able to share the responsibility.

A friend who was an only child told me once that her parents put all their expectations on her. All those hopes and dreams they had went on her, and if she didn't manage they were devastated. She felt that if she'd had siblings the pressure to perform all the time would have been less. Otoh if she'd had siblings she might have said that her parents preferred one because they "performed".

etc.

None.

I don't feel it's particularly affected or shaped my life in any way. I didn't have a great childhood but that was to do with my father's life choices, not whether I had siblings or not.

I don't have elderly parents yet which is what everyone bangs on about on here, so we'll see in the future.

One. An older brother.

It's a very positive thing for me. He is one of my best friends. He is very supportive, and also one of the funniest people I know.

Interesting that the comments about larger families are mainly negative - that’s also been my experience although I find the parents of large families are often rushing to tell you how wonderful it is and how of course everyone gets individual time/attention and money for hobbies/uni. My husband is from a large family and all of his siblings have had either two children or none which I think is quite telling.

Four older brothers, one younger sister.

There's been a lot of fighting- both physical and verbal- and a lot of time when some siblings haven't spoken to each other. One sibling lives in Oz and rarely speaks to any of us. One brother sexually abused me and one of our brothers when we were children.

I used to think that being one of six was a positive, but really what it meant was a) our mother was one of those women who 'just love babies!' and was incapable of dealing with teenagers and b) we were all neglected in various ways, some of which have caused lifelong issues.

So not a positive for me!

I have one sibling, we get on ok but we’re not overly close. I find it hard work having to keep in touch, Xmas , birthdays etc just because we are related. I’m an introvert and don’t need other people much except for DH and kids. Everything else is just a chore tbf.
I feel the same about my cousins, extended family holidays always bore me, I mute family WhatsApp chat as I’m not interested.
My sibling is ok but I don’t think my life has been enriched in any way because of being one of two.

1 step sister, 2 full brothers who are twins, 2 half brothers - one same mum, one same dad.

I'm the eldest. Pretty negative I would say

One of 8. Most younger than me. Very positive experience growing up as we always had someone to play with...lots of company.
All got on well as we married , had children but led mainly independent busy lives. The cousins love the gang whenever we get together. . Now as we are older and dc are moving on we have become very close, having weekends away and generally being very supportive to each other. Great friends. Especially good when dm was in need of care as many hands to take on the burden.
I just love being part of such a big family but it would be totally unrealistic today. The most our siblings have is 4 and a few have that many.

2 younger siblings, 5 years between eldest and youngest.

They haven't added anything good to my life. We stay in loose contact these days to keep an eye on elderly parents, but no real relationships. Is sad really, but I can only blame our parents for endlessly playing us off the other.

I have one brother , I wish I had more siblings as sometimes life is a bit intense with my mum and I think I would feel freer to consider moving away etc - my brother has kids and doesn’t live locally so a lot is down to my husband and I

One sister, 8 years younger. I loved playing with her as a baby, resented her a bit as a toddler and small child, have gotten on great with her since she was about 7/8. Definitely glad I have her, would have maybe liked another sibling- DS is definitely my mums favourite and I wonder if another sibling would maybe have softened that blow a little? Plus someone in the middle might have bridged the gap in our ages.

Only child here - very positive. So positive I have an only.

My mum is one of 3 sisters and she's the eldest. They all live a few miles apart and see each other at least weekly. They've had major fallings out over the years, but now they're in their 60's/70's they're such a lovely 3.

I'm an only and happy to be so, but then I know no different. My 3 closest friends are either only children or have no sisters or poor relationship with siblings.

My dad is 1 of 3. 2 male one female and they're not close at all. Live fairly close but meet up out of obligation rather than genuine love!

I have 2dd's 7&4. They fight light cage fighters but can also make each other laugh a LOT! I hope I get 2 girls who like each other. That's all I'd like.

My life would have been immensely better without them

I have two siblings. We love each other and have happy shared memories but we are all very different people and don’t live near each other or socialise as friends. We do make an effort to socialise as family. You don’t have to be best mates to appreciate having siblings. I sometimes wonder if they slightly resent me for coming along and ruining everything 😉

1 much older sister. She always resented me for taking away her only child status and has been jealous of me my whole life. Since her late teens she has bullied both me and my mother but my mum, fearing losing her relationship with my sister, overlooked everything in my direction, which has, over 20 years, eroded our relationship. Once my mother dies I'm going NC with my sister completely and can't wait. My MH will be much improved.

Hence having an only.

One younger brother. Adore him, so lucky to have him. We are very different but he has been a rock to me throughout our adult lives.

One brother, year above in school. Played together constantly throughout childhood. And close in teens.
Live far apart now, but love him so much!

I have a sister who was 18 months older than me, who passed away recently. She was awesome, but very naive in her behaviours, almost childlike..

Younger sister, 18 months younger than me. Not a very nice person. Always looking down on everyone, bullied me as children. I love her as my sister, I don't like her and actively try to avoid spending time with her.

Younger brother 10 years younger than me. Drug addict, waste of space. Nasty personality, only contact from him is the occasional abusive text message.

I'm an only child. For the most part I liked it though I did sometimes wish I had an older brother.

Both my parents and DH come from large families and none of them are close to their siblings.