Middle class families seem so much busier in the run up to Christmas

[Santasfakebeard]

The mc families in DC school seem to have something on the whole month of Dec judging by the dc's class whatsapp groups. Is it just a middle class thing? Pantos, choirs, concerts, wreath making & mulled wine family evenings, markets abroad, carol singing.
I would love my dc to experience it all but we simply don't have the funds.
Is it just the mc & umc that can afford to offer their dc those festive experiences?

Part of it is wanting to get out and about - when you're at home, it's too easy to get sucked into screen time. It's much easier to entertain kids out of the house, and at this time of year there are lots of lovely (albeit expensive) things to do that don't need a huge amount of effort (unless you're the one organising it!).

MC families have more money, and therefore can do more stuff - all year round.

I'm middle class to my absolute core and don't do most of this stuff. Church carol concert (although maybe not now DD is no longer at the local primary and singing the obligatory carol with the other kids). I don't like Christmas markets. DD is too old for visiting Father Christmas. Decs go up mid December. We go and buy a tree instead of spending a morning yomping through a tree plantation to choose one that we want to be executed on our behalf. We don't go skiing. Live rurally so a panto trip is a right faff and expense, although might pop to local village one (£2.50 and a free mince pie). I do spend a lot of time playing carols on the piano, but as a good MC woman, piano playing is in my DNA so I can't really help it.

Christmas is magical without all the dashing about and false jollity. And I actually think if you go racing about chasing the Christmassy-ness you are missing the point. It's about calm, peace, lights, music and appreciating what you've got. Stopping for a bit and enjoying your family and home. I've never managed to recreate that feeling while fighting my way through crowds to look at stuff being sold in fake chalets whilst drinking disgusting £10 a pop mulled wine.

What is this MN obsession with class?

I'm exhausted just reading about all that activity.

Also, Lidl do good mulled wine.

I wouldn't worry about it OP. The kids just probably want to watch telly

There will be a thread up on here on 26 December asking who has taken their decorations down!

Aw I didn’t have much when my child was young but I loved Christmas. We’d have a paper chain making night, putting the tree up, Christmas movie weekend, cutting out snowflakes and making mince pies, making a stable from a cardboard box… always remember buying a big bag of pet hay and brown paint (I’m not religious, but my mum was so we made that for her) went out with binoculars to try and spy a Robin, i was so lucky that I loved hanging around with my child and we were very similar… if I’d had a second we’d have likely been chalk and cheese! A day planning what to make for granny and granda for presents, making wrapping paper , all the daft stuff, I get what you’re saying OP but a lot of that organised stuff is rubbish! It sounds great but the reality is often so different! Oh and making doggy biscuits for presents, that was a good one they loved! Och I miss all that! X

I’m working class and northern and I like as event each weekend in December. I love Christmas and doing kid things with my daughter.

I think we would probably be considered middle class and I always did the cheap/free activities when my DC were small. Santa comes on his sleigh to our street every year (thanks to the Rotary club). DCs thought it was a treat to be allowed to go outside and see him as it was always after bedtime on a school night, so pyjamas and coats is the order of the evening!
We always used to spend a couple of evenings driving around the housing estates of 2 local towns to visit the lights displays of those houses who go OTT.
School always had a trip to the panto and a carol service with nativity so that cost very little.

Bit of a tangent but you can make Christmas wreaths for basically free with coat hangers, foliage from local parks /woods, ivy is particularly good, and satsumas dried in the oven. People going to classes for them are being ripped off x

Yes I think you are correct. We are MC and we did our first Christmas experience today (£100 for the 3 of us), wreath making, school Christmas fayre, Santa again next weekend, daughter has a Christmas dance show, we will go to Winter Wonderland and we have a panto booked. As well as flying to see family for a few days. It’s a lot!

We are all slightly grinchey, so no. I hate Christmas markets and anywhere with throngs of people and fake Swiss chalets. I just find a lot of these experiences are not that fun or good value. It's just a throng. We are doing the local panto and the dc are having some mates over one evening to make gingerbread houses (apparently this is something tweens/teens like to do ironically) and parents will have wine. DH and I are going to see Rest is Politics Live as our joint pressie to each other, but that's not very Christmassy. Possibly because my kids are older the weekends are still busy with sports and stuff so I don't want more things to do when I've just driven 4 hour round trip for 40 mins of mediocre mud wrestling rugby. I just want some down time. We will do the ice-skating in February just before it shuts as then it's really quiet.

We are going skiing but that's not a Christmas thing to me.

I know many working class people who have the means and more importantly, the energy to do all this too. They hate sitting still and not doing anything.

I agree OP.
I do love performative time-management though...
''Noah (7yr) has his own pumpkin-spiced latte stall at the school festive fayre. Mungo (5yr) is making hand-painted cards, and Arlo (3yr) is teaching vegan recipes at the local soup kitchen. I barely have time to manage their socials, let alone mull the wine, roast the chestnuts, or make figgy pudding...''

I do all those things with my children and we're nowhere near middle class. I love the run up to Christmas abs being busy.

18 years in the UK and never heard of wreath making and we live in London in a middle class area, need to google it.

No, even when on the bones of our arses, we had a lot to do in the run up to Christmas. Various lights, various little walking tours around the estate we lived on (council not naice type of estate) to look at Christmas lights. Church stuff was always free.
Activities at home, Christmas films.

Christmas is a time when you can really do a lot for not a lot.

We're kind of lefty middle class.

We go to church.

Our kids are taking part in concerts. singing/ playing.

One child is planning to accompany the village carol singers; we have carol singing with the neighbours; there is a children's nativity service at which they'll be playing.

The village has a Christmas lights evening when they get officially turned on, Santa materialises, music and carols and free mince pies and sausage rolls from the shops.

Christmas Fayres at school and in the village hall

Village panto (quite cheap and we can get away with sending the kids by themselves, they have a great time)

The kid who is in a band will be out every weekend playing carols. We might look around local Christmas markets in the course of chauffeuring them. There are secondary school concerts.

We might help a bit at the Christmas lunch in the church hall (arrangements not clear yet).

None of this will cost much (mind you, the music lessons can be eye watering)

Ahh, didn’t know this was a thing, we put the same plastic one every year. Is this a new thing?

Exactly this. I think people are doing more Christmassy things because there are way more Christmassy things to do, and since they often cost money, people with more money can do more of these things.

Of course there have always been and still are plenty of free or low-cost events (our local community centre had a brass band out playing carols yesterday, my 3yo loved it and we donated £1 to the bucket). But given the cost of living crisis, most people are just not spending as freely as they used to, so every business is using Christmas as a way to drum up sales. This is not a new tactic, of course, but it's definitely gone into overdrive as the Christmas season has grown to be two months long, and social media enables people to broadcast and amplify their activities. Everywhere has a Christmas "experience" you're invited to pay for, photograph and share.

I feel like the Christmas feeling, for me, tends to come from lovely walks in cold weather, cozy pubs, brass bands playing carols (love me a brass band!) and time with family. Of course, aside from the pub, those things don't cost very much so capitalism demands the creation of paid-for experiences to drive spending. Every park and outdoor space has a light trail now, for example - but why do this when we can walk around our neighbourhood at night and see everyone's lights and trees in their windows? (We're lucky to live in a safe, pleasant and walkable part of London.)

I saw the London zoo has gone all-out this year for Christmas (I'm sure it has in years past and I just haven't noticed), probably trying to entice people to pay the eye-watering entrance fee by offering a Christmas "experience" on top of the regular zoo trip.

We are definitely middle class and surrounded by all of this, but I'm not big on social media so don't give a shit about keeping up with the Joneses. We do one or two small activities, visit a couple of local Christmas fairs, share some photos with close family and enjoy the holidays. I can understand the pressure to "create" holiday magic for kids via all these experiences. And if you enjoy them and can afford them - great! Have fun! But people shouldn't feel like they are necessary to have a good Christmas. Before paying for something, ask yourself why - is this something that genuinely brings you joy, or is it something that you feel you "have to" do to make Christmas "magical" for your children.

You know what makes Christmas magical for children? A lovely tree, presents and chocolate. Attention and affection from their family. And Christmas specials of their favourite cartoons!

A lot has to do with planning and knowing what's going on in your local area. I've had panto booked since march, another Xmas show (for adults) since July, a Xmas light show since October. Then we have trips to local Xmas markets. Other free things we've booked is stick man showing at museum and Christmas carols singing. paying things off months in advance helps.

Yes very toxic taking your kids out in the run up to Christmas, ffs there’s some absolute looneys on here.

We haven't got much on. We went to the Lumiere at Durham last weekend- basically an evening walk with lovely light shows around the city. It was free but we bought refreshments and food. DC loved it .
PIL and DH are taking DC on a steam train ride to meet Santa in a couple of weeks. We are taking them to a panto and a film at our local cinema.
DH and I have a couple of nights out planned- just us going out for dinner.
That's it.
There'll be lots of walks, bike rides and nice times at home and with PIL - games and treats to eat and they'll love it. They think being with PIL is great.

We don't go mad with presents either. They like art stuff, crafts games and books and get a couple of proper presents each from us and one thing that they share and PIL get them two things each. They usually make them something really nice too. Last year FIL make DD some mini-gardening stuff which she loved. This year he has put a folder together for DS1 with all of their family history in it-DS1 will love the stuff about the people who were soldiers and sailors in the wars, seeing their photos and medals and hearing their stories- someone was a mayor in the 1600s and was knighted by the king and he'll be more interested in the rest as he gets older. They each get new clothes too.
I reckon it costs us £1200 all in- food, presents and outings.
Dh and I spend £100 max on each other- we just buy thoughtful treats we know the other likes.

Nothing to do with class, but we’re a young family and enjoy getting out and about!

This weekend we started with the markets and lights switch on in our town. We’ve also been at a pottery painting session making decorations and then to hobbycraft for card making prep. Things will kick off properly on Friday. We have lots on over the next few weeks: Christingle, the school nativity, mulled wine with the neighbours, Santa visit in a lovely nearby town we like, the ballet, Christmas Carol event in our town (not us singing) but we go and buy the wreath, Christmas tree farm, lots of crafting, trip for festive high tea with friends at a posh place in the city, lots of little visits and day trips for shopping… it’s just a bit of fun really!

We will also be doing lots of dog walking, time watching Christmas films, cooking, catching up with family at home / their homes - so free / cheap activities too. We just enjoy being busy at this point in our lives.

We've just had a drive round of the Christmas lights for the cost of fuel! It doesn't need to be expensive. Enjoy!