MIL said I need to take better care of my husband

[caggas]

I thought we could play a fun guessing game of why my MIL, without a shred of sarcasm, told me I need to take better care of my (42 year old) husband.

Winner can keep her!

My own mother called her ex DIL a despicable money grabber who should be ashamed of herself because she only cares about money and not her own kids.

This was because my brother cheated on her and ran off with another women, leaving her with 3 kids to look after and she’s asked for £25 a week to help with their costs.

My MIL once told me off because my husband forgot to pack his pants when we visited them. Did you forget his knickers?

Well, at least that's Christmas sorted!! Replace all his socks with these. Problem sorted.

Bloody hell!

I wouldn’t even do all that if the king was coming for a visit!

And we wonder why so many men think they’re superior because they were literally treated like they were Gods and we and their children were there only to serve them.

Business trip and you didn't leave the fridge full of food and all his clothes ironed?

His socks didn't match?

I didn't see the update! Haha, no no I don't want the prize 😂

Or take the prize straight to the tip, in several bin bags.

I missed the update!

That's a distressing failure on your part. Poor husband, I bet he had to put the socks on his own feet too 😫

But what did you say in response?

The 1930s dating guide always makes me hoot, as I know I did all of these in the late 1990s when dating DH. The young woman even looks a bit like me when I was 23. The thing is, I was just relaxing and being myself and he liked me as I was, and I didn't have to be on my best behaviour. DH didn't have a face on like this chap either though.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-5147811/The-patronising-1930s-guide-dating.html

<shouts above noise of telly, barking dogs, raucous kids with jam covered faces running up and down with dumb and screamingly excitedly>

WHERE'S MY HAIR RIBBONS? HAVE YOU LITTLE MONKEYS TAKEN MY HAIR RIBBONS?

<throws clutter onto floor from table>

<wonders what the burning smell is>

<remembers that a delicious meal of fish fingers and oven chips thrown together at the last moment carefully planned for maximum flavour and nutrition the night before has been incinerating away for 20 minutes too long because Husband has probably stopped off for a pint, it being Monday and the Worst Day Of The Week>

<knocks over the cup of tea ready poured for him, the thoughtless tw@t>

<mutters Bad Swears as pours out a large glass of gin>

<sticks kids in the garden and puts feet up>

<watches kids through patio doors and settles to The Archers . . . life is good>

My exMIL said this when I hadn't ironed my husbands shirts in the week I gave birth to the second daughter (which was tricky as he'd actually packed up and walked out for 5 of the days that week). She also told my exSIL this when her other son was on his 3rd affair.

This is hilarious and enraging in equal measure. The advice to ‘ be a little gay, and a little more interesting’ ( with a ribbon in your hair) would certainly be my way out

The ribbons one made me chortle too. And I really must remember to 'prepare the children'.

Can't wait for them both to get home from school so I can tell them TV will be going of thirty minutes early so I can get them prepared for their father.

I particularly like the cautionary photo with her fondling the hair of the bloke in the booth behind her.

Which of us hasn't felt to urge to do the same to some luxuriously tonsured stranger?

I hope you laughed in her face wtf 🤬

Are you not ironing his boxers? Cutting up his food for him?

running up and down with dumb

Apologies - this should read "with drum"

As you were.

You awful wife you!! Still, this is better than my mother blaming me for my divorce and saying I never cooked for my ex,
totally disregarding the fact that I was like a single mother on our marriage raising our child. I was astounded by her misogyny.

“Are you serious? As you're obviously into blaming women for men’s failings, how do you feel that you obviously raised a man so useless he can’t wash and match his own socks?”

“a haven of rest and order” ha ha…

Did he have to wipe his own arse?

I think your only option here is to say to her: "I'm sorry MIL...are you saying that you did such a poor job of raising your son to be a functioning adult who is capable of dealing with basic tasks in every day life that I now have to do that for him?"

And when she backtracks, say with a big smile "I thought that didn't sound right! Since you did indeed do a wonderful job of raising a fully functioning man who is capable of choosing his own socks and successfully dealing with a wide range of situations that just about every other adult goes through, I don't think we need to say anything more about that, do we?"

The only possible response to this would be to turn to your DH and demand, "So who dressed you this morning?"