When did you start leaving your children on their own at home?

[arintingly]

My 7 year old is starting to be asked to be left on his own when we are doing things like dropping the younger one off somewhere.

So far I have said no, but he keeps asking me and it's made me realise that I don't have a clear idea in my mind of when it would be ok

I'm thinking about starting to leave him for up to around half an hour from maybe when he's 8? Then look to build that up to an hour by the time he is 10. Does that seem reasonable? Not sure what others do

Haha, I agree on that.

I can't imagine letting my kids out to play on their own until they are at least 11. But being on their own at home feels a lot safer

We started leaving DS for half hour when he turned 10. He's now nearly 11 and we leave him for an hour or so.

DD is almost 8, for the last couple of months we've left the 2 of them home together for 20 mins max when we're no more than a 5 minute walk away e.g. when I have doctors appointments.

In terms of an age I think it will vary but I felt comfortable once my DC was able to use his iPad to text or call us if their was an issue.
I feel very uneasy about letting him play outside unsupervised. Although it's not really a thing around by us thankfully. I am guided by the school in terms of an age for this. They encourage children in to walk home from school in year 6, so I feel like toward the end of year 5 we will start building up to this, with short periods on his own outside the house.
I think it this independence is encouraged by the school at 10/11 then this is also a good age to allow children to be unsupervised inside the home.

I think as long as you are pragmatic about it, you know your child best.

We discuss what to do in the event of an emergency, so they know what to do in the event of a fire or where to go if someone is hurt.

My 13 year old and 8 year old are very sensible, know where the first aid kit is, etc etc.

My 14 & 10 year olds, not so much. But I can trust them to quietly chill while I pop to the shops or pick up a sibling.

But, for longer than a quick popping round the corner, I would make sure that either the 8 or 13 year old were home, as they are more practical, should something ever go wrong...

I've left my oldest alone for 10-15 mins max since about 8 but I live in a 4th floor flat with friendly neighbours with similar age children so not really alone. At 10 I'd be quite happy to leave her for a bit longer as she's very sensible but I think she'd get scared. My middle child is 7 and he's no where near ready.

I started with an hour at 8, up to two hours at 9, the occasional inset day at 10, to before and after school and school holidays (whatever I couldn't cover with annual leave or otherwise) at 11.

I've left my 11 year old for 30 mins. I check in to our Alexa (video screen one) and can watch her the whole time or speak to her - but tbh she's in that tween mode where she just lounges around watching the tv. She's not allowed near water (bath/shower) or heat. (Not that she'd whip herself up an omelette anyway!).

At 8 I left dd1 to take dd2 to the dr which was 2 mins walk away, we moved house at that point and I would leave them a bit as our neighbour looked out for them (could get from garden to garden without going on the street) gradually built up, I left them at 10&12 in school holidays, I worked pt though

Are they old enough to use a phone if there was an emergency
Be able to lock/unlock the door incase anyone tried to enter the house
Be sensible and not running around/jumping around or anything that might cause an accident
Know not to eat anything they could potentially choke on

I've just started leaving my 11 year old for around 15/20 minutes to collect his older sibling

I would never leave my 7 year old home alone, not even for 15 minutes. She is very smart and aware for her age, but in an emergency situation it's unlikely she would be prompt and reactive...she would just be a 7 year old child (as she should). I have left her with her 13 year old brother whilst I've popped to the shop across the road, but that's about it.

DD1 was 9. That was earlier than intended but was due to lock down. She was on lessons & I had to pop out for work. We kept in touch though. That was probably for about 90 mins.
DD2 was 8 but that was really because I felt more comfortable after having done it with DD1. That is never for more than 20 mins.
In my head I never envisioned leaving them before they were 10 but they are both sensible kids & it's just how it's worked out.
Like someone else said, we are lucky enough to live in a small area and they could knock on any door on our street and get help if needed.

Based on that list, 5 or 6. I didn't leave him until 8.

I agree with @Echobelly that it sort of comes naturally. Yesterday my DP was working in a neighbour’s garden just across the road, DD (9) was doing her homework and I wanted to go to the supermarket. I was about to bundle her up to come with me when I thought “she can just stay here!”. She could see DP from her bedroom window and was doing her homework so it worked out fine. When I got home, he’d finished the job and needed to go to one further afield so he took her with him. It’s just what makes sense at the time.

This has never come up for us as DH WFH full time, but I would probably leave DD to pick her brother up from school. She's 9. I probably could've left her when she was 4, she was born sensible. (I didn't, obviously!) I have occasionally left her to hang out by herself downstairs whilst I do something with DS - DH is upstairs but unavailable unless it's an emergency. She loves that!

DS is 5 and it's only been in the last year that I've felt able to trust him in a room on his own, let alone in the house. I think it'll be a little while past age 9 for him!

But I do think I'll be able to leave them alone together when DD is a bit older. Say 13 and 9 or so.

Started leaving my DD home alone age 8 while I went to the shops. It was very liberating for me and I think also for her.

Dc1 - the summer before they started secondary school, so 10/11…they have to catch a bus to and from school, started with short times, and it gradually got longer. Most days I am on the school run when dc1 arrives home and can be at home for up for 2 hours.

Dc2 - never…I am not entirely sure they will ever be old enough to not start a fire 🔥 or do something equally crazy 😂

Yeah DS would have ticked all of those last year when he was 6

My DD was 10 yrs old when I started leaving her alone. I would be for maybe a couple of hours.

From maybe 7, but literally for like 10minutes while I went down the lane and back to drop younger one to nursery. We live very rurally and there is not much trouble you can get up to in 10 minutes and certainly she was spending more time than that unsupervised playing outside out of sight.

She is 10 now and I would under certain circumstances consider leaving her for up to an hour, if I gave her her iPad so she could contact me if necessary.

That said, at 10, I was home alone every single day of every school holiday as I had a single parent who couldn’t just take off work. I used to walk the dog every day. Go to the library. I’d cook all my meals myself. By 13, I was doing 3 day overnights at home alone and would walk myself to school and back every day. This was even pre-mobile phones and I’d be lucky if my mum rang once during those 3 days. I survived, though I wouldn’t do either of those things with my own dc, if nothing else, they definitely aren’t as sensible as I was. 😂 My 10 year old nearly absentmindedly set the house on fire with me in the same room yesterday!

Absolutely shocked to hear some people thinks it’s ok to leave 5 or 6 year olds home alone!

This reminds me of my childhood. My mum used to go for a chat with the neighbour in the afternoon and I’d stay home. Probably 8 or so. I could actually hear them talking. My job was to knock on the wall at a particular time 😂

DS is 11 and I left him home alone for about 15 minutes while I took DD to drop her off somewhere last week, for the first time.

He's sensible & won't play up or answer the door. BUT he's autistic and panics easily. I had to be sure he knew what to do, calmly, in an emergency situation, before leaving him.

Exactly this. I read some posts and thought I had entered the twilight zone. Some have said they feel safe leaving as their kids have phones for emergency etc, but games on phones can also serve to be a distraction with kids. Once they are hyper focused on that...many emergencies may not even be noticed immediately. But just generally, I don't feel many children under 10 would cope effectively with an unexpected emergency and shouldn't have to either.

From 9 (year 5), I left my oldest at home whilst I dropped my youngest to an activity. I was only gone for 20 minutes. Around that time, he started walking home from school by himself. From 11, we’d leave him for a few hours.

Our youngest probably wasn’t left alone at all til 11 as she’d prefer to come with us or her older sibling was around if she stayed home.

I know we have a law about this where I live, but I wasn’t sure what it was so I checked, it’s 14!! But it says to leave a child for an “unreasonable” amount of time, so I don’t think an hour or two would count.

I started leaving DS when he was about 9 or 10 when I was dropping off his sister nearby, so maybe 15 minutes.

We left all of them (13,11, 8) for a couple of hours while we were out in the neighborhood. The dog was in charge because he snarled when we were coming in!