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At what age do you stop giving presents?

82 replies

DustyLee123 · 13/11/2023 10:51

My DH has a brother with adult kids, they are about 23 and 25 and both employed. DH still sends Xmas presents to them, and his DB sends vouchers to ours who are similar ages.
AIBU to think that there should be a cut off age when it stops? I’ve spoken to DH about it but he wants to carry on, and it’s none of my business really. I just think it’s ridiculous.

OP posts:
UsingChangeofName · 14/11/2023 19:19

I have absolutely no intention of stopping buying my nephews Christmas presents, why would I?

Well, no-one is saying you have to, but reasons many of us have are the sheer numbers.
10 nieces and nephews, becomes 20 once they have partners, then 40 once they have dc. My own dc alone used to be 3 people, but with partners that becomes 6 and - maybe one day, Grandchildren too. When does a partner make it on to the 'family' list ? How can you get a good present for someone you might not know that well ? Then, they move away for study, for work, for love, for adventure, so you have to factor in postage - not only the cost, but the logistics of it all. Then you might not see that niece that lives 300 miles away all that often, and that makes it even harder to get something they really like.

For me, it wasn't about money, but about stress and time. I will see my adult nieces and nephews sometimes, and will treat them to a meal, as we are close and I love them, but they don't need their Aunty to try to buy them a top which they probably wouldn't choose themselves or a book that they have already read or some perfume they don't really like to know that I love them. I hate waste, and to me, receiving presents I don't really like, is really wasteful. Even with lists, all of us trying to get things for dozens of other people, wrapping and the logistics of getting things to them, is all a bit silly. I have things I'd rather do with all that time saved.

stayathomer · 14/11/2023 19:23

We still do, eldest about 24 too. My aunt still sends me birthday presents and Christmas presents and I’m 43!!!!

Sugarfree23 · 14/11/2023 20:37

allhellcantstopusnow · 13/11/2023 20:09

I have absolutely no intention of stopping buying my nephews Christmas presents, why would I?

Because children grow up, get partners and multiple, then it gets very complicated. With their own parents, children and partners family to concentrate on visiting Aunit becomes a low priority.

Also young people in their 20s staying at home have more disposable income than Aunties who are paying off mortgages.

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Yettisrus2 · 14/11/2023 20:51

We still get presents from our aunt and uncle (usually vouchers) and we're 37-50. My parents do the same for our cousin.

greenacrylicpaint · 14/11/2023 20:56

anyone over 20 goes into secret santa.

Whatevershallidowithmylife · 14/11/2023 20:58

We stopped stopped DNNs at 21 so Christmas is down to 5 people to gift for now. I'll be having the conversation with two of these 5 next year about stopping buying which leaves 3 which would be the lowest I could buy for. I don't need more candles/handbags/purses etc, I would rather we just made more of an effort to catch up for coffee and cake for example.

RubyRoseVioletLillyJasminePeach · 14/11/2023 22:29

We buy everyone something

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