Ever see a post so specific that you are sure you know the OP, IRL?

[chessica]

For ages I’ve wondered if friends, family, colleagues, neighbours etc use mumsnet but I suppose most people wouldn’t really say if they did. Recently I’ve seen a really identifying post, which is a very big coincidence if it’s NOT the person I know!!

Got me thinking - how many people have recognised someone?

I often fill my posts with deliberate lies. Not necessarily to stop people from identifying me, but so that if they do identify me they immediately know that I’m telling ridiculous lies and it makes them laugh.
I try not to post anything that I wouldn’t be happy to see in the Daily Mail with my photo next to it.

There's someone who posts quite often and we have both worked out we live in the same town but I don't know if I know her IRL or not.

I found someone I know on here because they were being bitched about on Tattle.

I recognised someone on the baby names board once. Her DCs have lovely names but she was on the fence about changing the youngest one. She didn't go ahead in the end.

I also remember a thread once where a MIL posted about her DS and DIL moving away and her being upset about it. People were critical of the OP for not being supportive enough (although I don't think she was actually saying how she felt!). A colleague of the DIL recognised the situation and semi-defended her but I remember her saying something like 'she's not controlling, she just knows what she wants' and it very much sounded like she was controlling! Taught me to take so-called evil MIL posts with a pinch of salt and I have had more sympathy for them ever since!

Thank you to everyone who has commented on my post. Embarrassingly, I was in my 40s. My mum was violent and drunk. I spent her whole life trying to make her love me. When she posted on here, I name changed and replied, stupidly trying to defend her daughter - me. I reported myself to MN when I realised what I was doing. She died this year and her last words to me were that she loved my brother. I wish I was mature enough to not care. I always knew what she thought about me, but to see it on here really stung. I don’t know why.

My friend recognised me and told me so. She recognised a former username of mine, not sure whether she's spotted me posting under this one yet.

There's a fairly well known poster on here who I don't know IRL but I recognise as also being a very well known poster on another forum. Her posting style is identical in both places and she posts very outy details about her life.

I don't know if I've ever been spotted, but I've spotted two women I know. One was another mum from school who absolutely hated me for no reason & I was really tempted to say something!
The other one was a friend who was trying to start an affair with a married man (and mutual friend of us both). I'd warned her not to pursue it, but nothing I said made a difference. Her post on here was so obviously her, right down to her writing style. Thankfully he wasn't interested and she eventually let it drop. Our friendship kind of fizzled out a few months later for various reasons, but that was the main one.

If it was you I recognised, I really like and respect you so I don’t think it should cause any problems 🙂

Ah wait, but the person I’m thinking of loves After Eights. So it must be someone else. 😁

I recognised a friend who posted very specific details about her pregnancy and where she lived.

Also spotted a colleague on a baby names thread, either that or someone else has kids with exactly the same names!

I recognised someone because they described a very specific scenario that involved me. It was without context and made the situation sound very different to the reality.

I've recognised a few but haven't been recognised myself as I name change weekly since the SWAT thing and change key details too.

What SWAT thing? X

I’ve recognised six people on here now - in each case because they posted something very specific and identifiable. One was because she made an identical post on her Facebook and then posted the same query on here! The rest were because they had posted very very unusual and identifiable detail that I knew either IRL or from other forums where posters aren’t anonymous.

Makes me wonder whether it’s ever happened to me. I name change and alter some details of what I post for privacy reasons, but I’m sure occasionally something identifiable slips through. Even just telling an anecdote you’ve also told people IRL, for example - and you’d never know. I never told any of the people I recognised that I had recognised them — and for at least one of them I now know something quite awful and horrific and sad about her life that I’m sure she wouldn’t like me to know. I keep my mouth shut about that, and won’t ever tell anyone.

Never happened to me yet.

I recognised someone who described a very specific local scenario that had affected her family. We DMd about it.

Yes, I recognised someone once. Didn’t say anything to her. It was a very specific circumstance. She’d changed name for the thread so it wasn’t like I could stalk her round the board.

someone recognised me once too, that I know of. She told me and I changed my user name. I don’t suppose she found out anything juicy though-I’m very boring!

I enjoyed watching DH’s auntie get torn to shreds when she posted complaining about her children not being invited to our wedding

I got recognised once after telling a story in person that i also told in here. One person i was talking to had read it on here earlier in the day.

More recently I recognised a friend of mine as i read a thread on the fashion section about whether a certain outfit was a suitable wedding outfit, in her voice. There was nothing identifying but it was her style of writing. So i did an advanced search and it was most definitely her.

I found Mumsnet years ago after a friend was convinced I was a poster on here and asked me. I came on to have a look and the poster had very similar life experiences to me, quite uncanny but wasn’t me. I am here now though so, hello!

There's one person I recognise but I don't think they'd be surprised to find they'd been recognised. They wouldn't recognise me because my life has changed so much since I 'knew' them. So has theirs, it seems. I vaguely considered messaging them but I don't think they'd be interested.

No but it's really fucking weird and cringe worthy if you google a persistent problem in your life with the word mumsnet after it and google shows you your own namechanged posts 😱

I think that it’s actually quite difficult to spot people - unless it’s a very specific problem.

shit husbands with time consuming hobbies are everywhere. ( just one example)

I’ve also noticed so many people with very similar experiences that the post could’ve been written by 100+ people on MN on any given day. Lots of scenarios are more common than we realise

I recognised someone on here, she was suicidal with a new born. I contacted her HV and they visited first thing the next morning and were really blunt “you posted on MN you were going to kill yourself”
She was quite grateful later on as I remember
Other than that no, although my BF is on here I’ve never recognised her….

I’ve recognised two friends here and I expect I am identifiable occasionally. It doesn’t really bother me as I don’t post endless detail and tell my friends most things anyway.

I posted on a thread slagging off my brother as he'd been doing the script on ex SIL.

There was a couple of outing details I guess and poster said are you my ex SIL?

Probably and I know we never liked each other, but my word - I am still giving him merry hell for his cheating lies. I love him, but....