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Original poster

Are you the star of the show?

125 replies

cheesybutter · 30/10/2023 14:27

I was talking to a colleague this weekend (works night out) and she made a comment about how she was the star of the the show. I said "well we're all the star of our own lives" and she said no that out of everyone in her life, her family, friends and colleagues she sees herself as the main player and that everyone else was just a bit part to her staring role and that everything revolved around her, everyone wanted her time and company because she's the star of their lives as well as her own!

She is a single, mid 40's women with no kids, she has a very active social life and in my experience a caring person who does a lot of people but can be a bit of diva but I was shocked that she literally thinks that she is the star not only of her own life but of everybody else's life!

She wasn't even tipsy because she was driving so it wasn't drink talking. In one way I admire her confidence but I also find it kind of bizarre, I don't know perhaps lots of people go about thinking that? I can be preoccupied with my own life and stuff like anyone else but I don't imagine anyone but my nearest and dearest think about me too much at all!

OP posts:
ohyesohyesoh · 30/10/2023 14:46

Did you laugh?? I agree with your comment about us having the lead role in our own lives...her comment I think is very odd

Original poster
cheesybutter · 30/10/2023 14:55

@ohyesohyesoh I did laugh and didn't argue with her as she is a nice person really but yeah I cannot get over her actually thinking that!

OP posts:
piscofrisco · 30/10/2023 15:28

Honestly people don't have talk some shite nowadays. Main character energy and such like. I blame the internet.

Poppins2016 · 30/10/2023 15:37

Your friends outlook is rather intriguing, as is your assertion that she's caring... my suspicion is that it's a veneer, but it's hard to piece the puzzle together without first hand experience!

I've only ever met one person who (openly) thought of themselves like this and he was incredibly selfish and (yes, admittedly an armchair diagnosis) narcissistic. He used to charm people in order to get away with his selfishness/tendency to use/take advantage of people, but people eventually saw through him (a little like you seem to, AKA mentioning "diva tendencies") and eventually walked away.

Original poster
cheesybutter · 30/10/2023 15:40

@Poppins2016 Don't get me wrong she can be a Diva at times but she is also kind and thoughtful which is part of the reason why she is so popular with people. I did wonder if it was a bit of front or someway she boosts her confidence at times or perhaps as @piscofrisco it is just some nonsense off the internet she has picked up.

OP posts:
Temporaryname158 · 30/10/2023 15:40

She’s bonkers! I’d have felt the need to correct her that she wasn’t the star in my life and that if she asked she’d find her assumption of others incorrect!

Adelaide66 · 30/10/2023 15:48

The nicest people are the most humble IMO

CarlosDisagrees · 30/10/2023 16:01

I don’t think she’s as caring as you think she is. She thinks she’s more important than everyone else and those types are never genuinely nice.

I had many similar conversation years ago with a boyfriend of a relative. It turned out he was often snorting coke which probably explains the talking shite and inflated ego.

tobee · 30/10/2023 16:10

How can she be the star of everybody's show when that's me?

BrieAndChilli · 30/10/2023 16:21

does she think that people are just sitting around at home waiting for her to interact with them???

TruthThatsHardAsSteel · 30/10/2023 16:43

Good grief. Sounds like her head is firmly up her arse

Hibambinos · 30/10/2023 16:46

Ah bless her. It helps her get up in the morning !

Doormatnomore · 30/10/2023 16:49

I think it’s lovely to hear someone actually say it out loud. Cause I’ve often thought (or said) someone just thinks I stand in the cupboard till they’re ready for me.

I can’t imagine having the confidence to think I was the star of the show.

PrincessHoneysuckle · 30/10/2023 16:50

tobee · 30/10/2023 16:10

How can she be the star of everybody's show when that's me?

🤣

Sgtmajormummy · 30/10/2023 16:55

I’d like to think I’m the Eminence Grise in everybody else’s show…

Rosecoffeecup · 30/10/2023 17:01

She sounds insufferable

Angrymum22 · 30/10/2023 17:01

In my experience most single, childless women are the centre of their own universe. They have no one else to think about. I don’t mean it in a mean way, but those of us with DH,DC, a dog, a cat, etc. always put everyone else before ourselves. It’s our default setting. Although, I do know a few women who despite having all the above are still the centre of their own universe. It’s known as narcissism.

Flori7 · 30/10/2023 17:07

Sorry, but I would have assumed she was having some kind of episode or had taken something giving her delusions of grandeur. If not, I would have roared with laughter thinking she was taking the piss.

Chattybot · 30/10/2023 17:08

Wow. This would be enough to put me right off a person.

She may have a veneer of acting kind and thoughtful and lovely, but ultimately she's utterly self-obsessed and arrogant.

I knew someone like this and they got worse and worse with age as the veneer wore off.

Cumbrianlife · 30/10/2023 17:09

Is she my MIL? She even has her adult DC brainwashed convinced of this. At the wedding of our niece recently SIL stated, "Today is all about mum." It's bizarre to me. She also cried at my DM's funeral because DH and DS weren't paying her enough attention. I'd just had major surgery and held onto them both in order to be able to walk into the church.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 30/10/2023 17:12

She sounds ridiculous... totally lacking in any kind of normal self awareness.

Nobody is the star of anyone else's show, that's just common sense.

Discointhekitchen · 30/10/2023 17:14

Shows a major lack of self awareness- it’s quite stunning to think that a woman in her mid 40’s would firstly even think this and b) to be daft enough to say it out loud…it’s not exactly in keeping with her kind caring image, is it?

she sounds nuts! You could forgive someone in early twenties thinking this, but but forties? Wow!

She sounds like Amanda from Motherland!

Thehonestybox · 30/10/2023 17:15

This is the kind of thing I'd say in a tongue in cheek way...so are you sure she was being dead serious? It's quite a truly narcissistic belief to have so I was would have replied with something like "that's funny that you haven't realised that YOU are actually a supporting character because I am the real star of the show!" and then seen if she laughed or if she disagreed with seriousness.

Disorganisedmess2023 · 30/10/2023 17:16

So basically she's self involved and a drama queen?

MargaretThursday · 30/10/2023 17:22

How old is she?

This reminds me of chaperoning an amateur pantomime. I had a group of boys aged 5 through to about 8. They got on reasonably until the youngest, at the end of one of the performances decided to announce that actually they all ought to know that he was "the star of the pantomime." The other chaperone said to him that they were all doing the same, and the boys chimed in to say none of them was the star, that was Cinderella. He responded by shouting "yes, but everyone really thinks I'm the best".
He was asked to be quiet and pointed out that it was about teamwork, not who was the best, but he kept going up to one or the other and saying "my mum/everyone says I'm the star."
I could feel the other boys bristling, so I said "all your parents think you're all the best" and one of the 7 yos said "yes, that's true, my mum thinks I'm the star even if all I do is hold up a sign saying Bethlehem " which made me laugh as it was very true.
At this point youngest boy stated "no, all your mums think I'm the best".
I did at that point the only thing I could think of, which was grab his bag, and extract him from the room at haste and hand over to another chaperone saying to get him out asap before he got lynched by 7 overtired boys who until that moment had only thought about having fun and didn't care who was the star.

He was a tired 5yo. What excuse does your friend have?

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