I cannot cope with these kittens anymore

[raggeddolls]

I’m at my wits end. Please be kind because I am trying my best but just don’t know what to do for the best.

We used to have 2 male cats (brothers) who recently passed away within months of each other at age 15. They were Burmese and only ever went to the vets for their annual check which vets said had to be done to get flea/worm treatment.

We missed them so much that we got 2 new kittens, ragdolls. We have had them 3 months and I just can’t cope with the constant stress. They are house cats so can’t go out. Except they are both desperate to go out and sit at the door crying. We got them harnesses and took them out in the garden but that isnt enough they try to break free etc I don’t blame them why would they want to be on a lead when they want to be free!

They have so many interactive toys to try and keep them entertained but they get bored of them easily. I have another toy coming from Amazon today but they have a basket full already.

They are always trying to escape. We cannot leave the house and cannot get into the house without them trying to flee. They know the sound of the door & know putting our shoes on means we’re going out so the door will be open. Even hanging out washing is a nightmare as they sit waiting by the door for their chance.

We can no longer have any windows open. We had our bedroom window open a fraction and one of them got out and jumped. Luckily he landed in a tree and we were there at 1 in the morning on a step ladder rescuing him. Amazingly he had no injuries.

They are so fussy with their food. I have bought all the recommended Ragdoll wet food and dry food but sometimes they refuse it & then I keep trying different foods which they eat for a big then they go off it. It’s a nightmare as I get so anxious they are not eating enough.

Worst of all is that they seem to be ill
so often. They both had a sickness bug when they were 4 months old. Huge vets bill but worse was trying to get the medication down them. They look like ragdolls but neither have the relaxed temperament. Last week one of them had an eye infection, another trip to the vets. Trying to give him an eye drop twice a day is horrendous as he fights it and gets so distressed which distresses me. Just noticed the other kitten now also has picked up same eye infection which means another trip to the vets. I looked up the eye drop online which costs £4.50 but it is prescription only and the vets charge £20 just for the drop and £40 consultation fee. I have rung vets to see if they will just give me the drops without seeing him as he obviously got it from his brother but they said they need to see him. So all the stress of getting an appointment and the stress taking him to vets. They both cry and howl when they go.

I am just so stressed and wishing I’d never bought them. The vet bills are huge but more than that it’s the constant anxiety about them always being unwell, always trying to escape and trying to find something they will eat.

Ragdolls are meant to be placid creatures yet these ones are not. We visited the kittens mum and dad several times who are both friendly and viewed these kittens several times and again seemed friendly until we got them home!

Before getting these kittens I followed several Ragdoll owners on social media and their kittens are placid and gentle whereas mine are not and even cutting their nails is a struggle.

Will it get better? If I could give them back I would. The problem is I love them so much but they cause me constant anxiety. Never had this with my previous cats ☹️

Rag dolls have only existed as a breed since the 60s. They are not some mystical creature that cannot go outside.

I’ve had more bites, hisses and scratches off my moggy than the Bengal ever did.

Granted I’ve got a keloid scar where he ripped my thumb but I was trying to get him off a mouse so it was my own fault.

I have a Ragdoll, they normally say having a pair is much easier than one as they have someone to play with. I'm shocked they want to get out as cats that haven't been exposed to the outdoors don't normally crave to be outdoors.

Have the cats got all the papers to confirm they are pure ragdolls? They aren't very placid in the sense they do their own thing, they are like very needy dogs / toddlers and need lots of playing with/ food puzzles / tunnels/ balls / wand to chase ... what cat tree do you have? You need one from cattreeking as they are very heavy cats.

They are placid as in they normally flop about, you can stroke their tummies, kids can normally carry them like babies, don't scratch.

I recommend stop putting them on a harness and letting them out - they will stop wanting to go out when they realise its not an option.

My ball of fluff - he's 6kg of neediness.

This is illegal. Well done 👍

Are they spayed/ neutered?

The constant desire to get out is possibly related to being intact.

Also can I ask if you have pet insurance?

Bear in mind that cats can sense anxiety / stress so sometimes that can affect their behaviour. With regards to food I just buy sheba because he hates the posher ragdoll stuff.

Have they been this way for the 3 months you have had them or is it a new thing? What about Feliway or lavender calming collars?

We have a 5 month old ragdoll. He fits the breed description, but has also been desperate to go outside. We’ve just started letting him roam our small garden supervised. Seeing his joy has confirmed that he’ll be an outdoor cat. We don’t live by a busy road and we’re in a nice area, where I don’t worry about theft.

I know it’s a risk but I’d rather he live a shorter, but more natural life. That’s how I see it. I’m also hoping he won’t be a great hunter. No evidence of great skills yet.

Whilst I agree these kittens need to be let out, I just wanted to say my cat is an indoor cat. Now. She wasn’t when she was younger but now she has no interest in going out which is good since we have moved to a main road. She’s quite happy to lounge about but she’s 7

I'd let them out, the reason they're getting ill is because they're stressed.

I don't see the point in pedigree cats, why didn't you just get a couple of moggies from a local rescue?

Get trackers on them, they will be fine. I have a Maine coon cross, he is still young and l can tell exactly where is he twenty four seven. He does some miles, you can get info off tracker but he doesn't actually venture that far, you will soon see their regular route and hiding places, he stays within a few gardens as you can track history. It's given me huge peace of mind because in the summer he will be out for hours. He would go absolutely stir crazy if l kept him in. I have four cats and they all go outdoors and never had any problems.

The whole free-roaming thing is very country-specific. In most places in Europe and North America it's not at all the norm to let cats roam the streets. And British cities are not now what they may have been 40-50 years ago when it was perhaps safer. Most weeks I read on Facebook how cats have been mauled to death by dogs or shot with air riffles, on top of the usual RTAs.

OPs cats have not been used to going out so how can they miss it, let alone know it's best for them? We are not talking ex ferals who've been used to total freedom for years here but pampered pedigree kittens. Just as you would protect babies and toddlers from dangers, kittens need protection too as they are totally daft and will do things that put them in danger.

Cat proofing your garden would be the ideal solution. It's also completely normal to catproof windows if you have indoor cats. Flat Cats screens are good or you can get window restrictors so they only open an inch or so.

I have just got a ragdoll cat after years of having moggies and I can see why they are Indoor cats.
I have read they are unable to defend themselves enough from other cats or predators and don't really have the awareness of danger .

How much of that is true I don't know but I can see these traits in my new cat.
I haven't let her out yet as it's only been a couple of weeks but I'm nervous to in a way I have never been with my other cats.

I don’t think any animal is meant to be indoors for their entire life, I also think it’s unfair to deny them of it. I would cat-proof your garden, if finances allow, it will be safer for them too and they’ll have the freedom of outdoors. You also need pet insurance.

In most places in Europe and North America it's not at all the norm to let cats roam the streets.

North America yes, not so in much of Europe. And that is due to predators like bears and other large animals.

Let them out. It's cruel to keep cats locked in houses, goes against every instinct they have.

Maybe Google Ragdolls, they aren't "proper" cats would be like letting your dog out unsupervised. Also it's not cruel other countries like Australia manage to have a high population of indoor cats as its a danger to wildlife

For people saying let them out. Ragdoll cats are lovely but incredibly dopey. They would literally find a road and sit in it if they were allowed out. OP can you get a large cage made to go in your garden. A handyman should be able to make you one. I've seen them with a wooden frame then chicken wire up the sides and over the top. You could place it over a patch of grass. Do they have an indoor climbing tree?

Yes, this is very similar to what my friend has. She got a handyman to make hers and it wasn't even that expensive.

To answer some questions, yes they have a huge cat tree by the window. We live in a 3 storey house with plenty of room so they are forever charging up and down the stairs and playing in the many rooms we have.

We got 2 for company and they love each other very much and play together. They are neutered and chipped.

All the research is quite clear. For their own safety ragdolls should not go outside. There is a lot of ignorance in this thread from people who know nothing about ragdolls. I am not trying to make them miserable, keep them “prisoner” or be selfish, I am trying to take care of them. It would be like letting a toddler go outside in their own. I have heard stories from Ragdoll owners who let their cats outside and many died. Whilst some posters think they “should take their chance outside” I disagree.

We cannot have a catio due to the design of our garden - think opening the door straight onto stairs to get to the garden. I don’t know if we can catproof, we have lots of shared hedges/bushes instead of fences. What I need is a new build house they seem to have very small but safe enclosed gardens.

We want to move next year so maybe I can look into this. I love the kittens deeply. I am hoping they will calm down in a bit. The posters saying I’ve forgotten about what kittens are like are right! My older cats did go outside and I never used to worry about them because they were more intelligent and street wise than a Ragdoll.

Great advice. I’d let them out. You’ll be crazy nervous but I bet they get used to it. My road has two rag dolls who roam outside and everyone knows them! They are odd creatures but don’t go far and always happy to have a chat/stroke.

Electric shock collars are illegal from February 2024…

Most toddlers just want to go outside & roam free.

ragdolls & toddlers have a lot in common, would you just let your toddler out onto the streets because that's what they want???

personally I couldn't have indoor kittens/cats as I couldn't handle the pressure of keeping small creatures safely inside the house & even during the winter I have windows & doors open, it eould drive me bonkers.

but I think people keeping their ragdoll type cats indoors are doing the best for them, NOT being cruel.

the vet thing is neither here nor there-if you own a pet be prepared to pay out if theyre ill

the leting out thing maybe they'll calm down soon or you can let them go out and supervise for a bit

OP we have a Ragdoll, he goes out and he is absolutely fine. He hated being inside too. We put a tracker on him (tractive) so we can see where he is and we can rescue him if he gets lost. Honestly just let them out - they’ll be so much happier, fitter and then when they come home they just want to sleep and be cuddly. Also I’d recommend Katkin fresh steamed meat food, keeps them super healthy and stops the gastro problems.

We had 2 rag dolls for 18 years. They always went outdoors and loved it. They could certainly hold their own against other cats and went in and out as they wanted through a cat flap. They are beautiful cats with a lovely cuddly nature and we miss ours every day.