Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

I cannot cope with these kittens anymore

192 replies

raggeddolls · 23/10/2023 12:40

I’m at my wits end. Please be kind because I am trying my best but just don’t know what to do for the best.

We used to have 2 male cats (brothers) who recently passed away within months of each other at age 15. They were Burmese and only ever went to the vets for their annual check which vets said had to be done to get flea/worm treatment.

We missed them so much that we got 2 new kittens, ragdolls. We have had them 3 months and I just can’t cope with the constant stress. They are house cats so can’t go out. Except they are both desperate to go out and sit at the door crying. We got them harnesses and took them out in the garden but that isnt enough they try to break free etc I don’t blame them why would they want to be on a lead when they want to be free!

They have so many interactive toys to try and keep them entertained but they get bored of them easily. I have another toy coming from Amazon today but they have a basket full already.

They are always trying to escape. We cannot leave the house and cannot get into the house without them trying to flee. They know the sound of the door & know putting our shoes on means we’re going out so the door will be open. Even hanging out washing is a nightmare as they sit waiting by the door for their chance.

We can no longer have any windows open. We had our bedroom window open a fraction and one of them got out and jumped. Luckily he landed in a tree and we were there at 1 in the morning on a step ladder rescuing him. Amazingly he had no injuries.

They are so fussy with their food. I have bought all the recommended Ragdoll wet food and dry food but sometimes they refuse it & then I keep trying different foods which they eat for a big then they go off it. It’s a nightmare as I get so anxious they are not eating enough.

Worst of all is that they seem to be ill
so often. They both had a sickness bug when they were 4 months old. Huge vets bill but worse was trying to get the medication down them. They look like ragdolls but neither have the relaxed temperament. Last week one of them had an eye infection, another trip to the vets. Trying to give him an eye drop twice a day is horrendous as he fights it and gets so distressed which distresses me. Just noticed the other kitten now also has picked up same eye infection which means another trip to the vets. I looked up the eye drop online which costs £4.50 but it is prescription only and the vets charge £20 just for the drop and £40 consultation fee. I have rung vets to see if they will just give me the drops without seeing him as he obviously got it from his brother but they said they need to see him. So all the stress of getting an appointment and the stress taking him to vets. They both cry and howl when they go.

I am just so stressed and wishing I’d never bought them. The vet bills are huge but more than that it’s the constant anxiety about them always being unwell, always trying to escape and trying to find something they will eat.

Ragdolls are meant to be placid creatures yet these ones are not. We visited the kittens mum and dad several times who are both friendly and viewed these kittens several times and again seemed friendly until we got them home!

Before getting these kittens I followed several Ragdoll owners on social media and their kittens are placid and gentle whereas mine are not and even cutting their nails is a struggle.

Will it get better? If I could give them back I would. The problem is I love them so much but they cause me constant anxiety. Never had this with my previous cats ☹️

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
WeighDownOnMeStayTillMorning · 23/10/2023 15:12

Yeah it's bullshit, and clearly just something selfish people tell themselves so they can have the pet they want and not actually consider the needs of the animal.

Hugosauras · 23/10/2023 15:12

I would just let them out. I've never kept my cats in. I would be upset if something happened to them, but I am giving them the best life that I can and that includes a stimulating environment. The infections could be stress related from being kept in. If you let them out it would also solve your food dilemma. They will either catch mice or visit neighbours to see what better food is on offer. 😉

2023shady · 23/10/2023 15:13

MN seems to be split into 2
There was a thread the other day saying cats shouldn't be allowed out and now this one everyone is saying they shouldn't be kept in
Some cat breeds shouldn't go out because in the nicest way, they're dim and too friendly so likely to walk into a road, get lost or be harmed by someone

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Hugosauras · 23/10/2023 15:16

No cats are bred to be indoor cats. That's just the breeders making stuff up because they are trying to protect their cats from the big wide world. The fact that the cars are telling you that they are absolutely desperate to go outside prices that they are not bred to be indoor cats. Just let them out and enjoy life.

Toddlerteaplease · 23/10/2023 15:16

Can they go into a cat proofed garden? My Persians do.

SplendidUtterly · 23/10/2023 15:17

Either let them out or re-home them. Do whichever makes you feel the most comfortable op.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 23/10/2023 15:17

I don't understand the housecat thing at all

Hugosauras · 23/10/2023 15:17

@2023shady

The same could be said for many people, yet they are allowed out, can drive, vote and have children.

DogDream · 23/10/2023 15:17

We let our Ragdoll out in a cat proofed garden.

Cherrysoup · 23/10/2023 15:18

Catio. Imagine being confined to the house 100% of the time. You chose a breed that can’t really go free, but the least you can do is improve their environment, it’s really unfair to keep them confined. I go stir crazy if I’m indoors all day.

Toddlerteaplease · 23/10/2023 15:18

Ragdolls in general have to be 'indoor' as they just don't have the brain cells to go outside. They would also get stolen. But they should be fine in an enclosed garden.

2023shady · 23/10/2023 15:18

Hugosauras · 23/10/2023 15:17

@2023shady

The same could be said for many people, yet they are allowed out, can drive, vote and have children.

True don't get me started on that Grin

Lilibert456 · 23/10/2023 15:22

user1471494352 · 23/10/2023 15:15

We have this, which is excellent.

https://www.freedom-fence.co.uk/

What utter madness.

WonderingWanda · 23/10/2023 15:22

Build them a catio type enclosure for outside. Kittens do get into everything and they calm down when then get a bit older. Get screens fitted to your windows. Also my vet told me to try cooled black tea for gunky eyes before shelling out on eye drops, works a treat!!

DaisyMaisyFaisy · 23/10/2023 15:25

I hope you manage to sort something, it sounds like you’re all miserable at the moment.

I’d definitely try and catproof your back garden

usernother · 23/10/2023 15:26

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 23/10/2023 15:17

I don't understand the housecat thing at all

I think it's people who want a cat because they want a cat. But they don't think about what's best for the cat. If you live somewhere too dangerous for a cat, and you're not going to let it out, then don't get a cat. It's not fair.

MeinKraft · 23/10/2023 15:30

2023shady · 23/10/2023 15:13

MN seems to be split into 2
There was a thread the other day saying cats shouldn't be allowed out and now this one everyone is saying they shouldn't be kept in
Some cat breeds shouldn't go out because in the nicest way, they're dim and too friendly so likely to walk into a road, get lost or be harmed by someone

From what I can see almost everyone is agreement that the cats should be allowed access to the outside but protected by a catio or other type of fencing.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 23/10/2023 15:31

@usernother completely agree and well said. A cat got run over in our road but he was doing what he loved which was going around everyone's houses and driveways every day. Ours went missing once and has never gone far since but I could never keep her in

Witchesdontburn · 23/10/2023 15:37

user1471494352 · 23/10/2023 15:15

We have this, which is excellent.

https://www.freedom-fence.co.uk/

They’re illegal. It’s a electric shock collar

TheHawkisHowling · 23/10/2023 15:39

Let them out.

GeorgeSpeaks · 23/10/2023 15:50

Let them out. Better they have a short and happy life than a long captive one.

AngryBirdsNoMore · 23/10/2023 16:03

Laiste · 23/10/2023 14:33

4 ragdolls here. Back garden access only.

One always comes to the front door when he hears it - but nowadays (he's 2) he no longer makes a dash for it.

Do the bracket and netting thing pictured up thread right round the top of your garden fences and they can't get out and other cats can't get in. Which is nice! Done it successfully in two houses now. Net over any fancy iron sidegates too. Ours love a roll about in the sun and jump about after the grasshoppers. They don't bother even actually trying to get over the fence.

If your boundaries aren't fences and are hedges or similar then the catio is what you need i guess.

Here's our 2 year old 😍 They do calm down at 18 months ish OP.

Look at those eyes! Absolutely beautiful

FancyFanny · 23/10/2023 16:03

FFS! Just let the poor things out! They'll have a lovely stimulating time and then come back for dinner and sleep for the rest of the day!

Cats are not bred to be indoor cats- there's little genetic difference amongst domestic cat breeds- they're all capable of going out and fending for themselves for a few hours and then coming back.

AngryBirdsNoMore · 23/10/2023 16:06

MeinKraft · 23/10/2023 15:30

From what I can see almost everyone is agreement that the cats should be allowed access to the outside but protected by a catio or other type of fencing.

I got told to keep my Bengal cross in by someone who compared the breed to a vicious pitt bull 😂

That pitt bull is currently lying alongside 3 month old DS2, they’re about the same size. He’s got his hand in her fur, I think he likes how soft and warm she is. Yesterday DS1 aged 2 was playing with her, offering her his toy ice cream and I swear she was dutifully playing along. She’s never swiped with claws at either of them. She is the world’s most patient cat.

Mumsnet is weird sometimes.