I cannot cope with these kittens anymore

[raggeddolls]

I’m at my wits end. Please be kind because I am trying my best but just don’t know what to do for the best.

We used to have 2 male cats (brothers) who recently passed away within months of each other at age 15. They were Burmese and only ever went to the vets for their annual check which vets said had to be done to get flea/worm treatment.

We missed them so much that we got 2 new kittens, ragdolls. We have had them 3 months and I just can’t cope with the constant stress. They are house cats so can’t go out. Except they are both desperate to go out and sit at the door crying. We got them harnesses and took them out in the garden but that isnt enough they try to break free etc I don’t blame them why would they want to be on a lead when they want to be free!

They have so many interactive toys to try and keep them entertained but they get bored of them easily. I have another toy coming from Amazon today but they have a basket full already.

They are always trying to escape. We cannot leave the house and cannot get into the house without them trying to flee. They know the sound of the door & know putting our shoes on means we’re going out so the door will be open. Even hanging out washing is a nightmare as they sit waiting by the door for their chance.

We can no longer have any windows open. We had our bedroom window open a fraction and one of them got out and jumped. Luckily he landed in a tree and we were there at 1 in the morning on a step ladder rescuing him. Amazingly he had no injuries.

They are so fussy with their food. I have bought all the recommended Ragdoll wet food and dry food but sometimes they refuse it & then I keep trying different foods which they eat for a big then they go off it. It’s a nightmare as I get so anxious they are not eating enough.

Worst of all is that they seem to be ill
so often. They both had a sickness bug when they were 4 months old. Huge vets bill but worse was trying to get the medication down them. They look like ragdolls but neither have the relaxed temperament. Last week one of them had an eye infection, another trip to the vets. Trying to give him an eye drop twice a day is horrendous as he fights it and gets so distressed which distresses me. Just noticed the other kitten now also has picked up same eye infection which means another trip to the vets. I looked up the eye drop online which costs £4.50 but it is prescription only and the vets charge £20 just for the drop and £40 consultation fee. I have rung vets to see if they will just give me the drops without seeing him as he obviously got it from his brother but they said they need to see him. So all the stress of getting an appointment and the stress taking him to vets. They both cry and howl when they go.

I am just so stressed and wishing I’d never bought them. The vet bills are huge but more than that it’s the constant anxiety about them always being unwell, always trying to escape and trying to find something they will eat.

Ragdolls are meant to be placid creatures yet these ones are not. We visited the kittens mum and dad several times who are both friendly and viewed these kittens several times and again seemed friendly until we got them home!

Before getting these kittens I followed several Ragdoll owners on social media and their kittens are placid and gentle whereas mine are not and even cutting their nails is a struggle.

Will it get better? If I could give them back I would. The problem is I love them so much but they cause me constant anxiety. Never had this with my previous cats ☹️

Catio and pet insurance.

I'd consider both absolute necessities.

Genuine question though. So what? They might come to harm, they might not. But if they don't go out they're going to be miserable every single day of their lives.

I know what I think is worse.

I feel for you. We have a Maine Coon who was indoors only but we've had to give up and let him into the garden in the last few months. We've cat proofed as much as we can but haven't secured around the top of the fences. He seems content to stay in the bushes in the garden anyway, he was just desperate to be outdoors.

I did worry about him in the beginning, he's really really stupid and hasn't figured out how the cat flap works after over a year of watching our other cat go in and out. Now I've started to relax because I've realised he's also too stupid to figure out how to scale a 6ft fence. I used to let him out supervised only and that worked ok but now I go back inside for a half an hour and when I come back he's waiting at the door.

I have always taken the view that I’d rather my cats had a shorter, happier life than a long, miserable life as indoor cats. But I’ve lived near quite quiet roads since I’ve had cats and I’ve never had a Ragdoll.

My cats have been bengal mixes and street moggies. All have been DESPERATE to get outside, even if they then just lie on the patio directly outside the door. Except when I lived in a country where rabies and FIV were rife, I’ve therefore always let my cats out (once vaccinated and ‘done’).

Kittens are a nightmare. They greatly improve around a year old, and even more around two years old, in my experience.

Cat proof your garden. You can get these roller things for fences so they can't climb up. Or make a run from a cat flap to straight through tunnels into your garden? Sorry no help as I don't have them but I looked into them a while back. As I have children I couldn't run the risk of the door being left open and we couldn't afford to cat proof the garden

Let them out. My Nan has a rag doll and he pretty much lives outside exclusively. Only comes in for food

Sounds like my ragdoll. Couldn’t possibly keep him in. I was terrified to let him out, breeder warned me not to as ragdolls are too stupid, he will get stolen etc etc
He started going out and now lives just like a normal cat, comes & goes when he pleases, hunts (mostly unsuccessfully!) lies in the sun in the garden.
My ragdoll is not placid, he would never allow a stranger to just pick him up, he hates being held and would more likely scratch someone’s eye out!

I do feel for you - I would have loved a ragdoll but couldn't contemplate having an indoor cat. Even keeping the kitten in for the first few months until he was neutered/vaccinated/grown was hellish. Cat proofing the garden or a catio seem to be your best bet

He sounds amazing ❤️

I would definitely get a catio.

Its basically like a rabbit run/aviary that you connect to a window and the cats can go outside and play but are still enclosed so they are safe.

They’re at the crazy ages right now but should settle down.

You’ve gone from elderly cats that sleep all day to crazy toddler kittens that don’t stop. It’s definitely going to be a shock to the system!

Definitely try the catio and see how you get on for a couple of weeks.

If you are still struggling then get rid of them as they are still young enough to find a great home.

4 ragdolls here. Back garden access only.

One always comes to the front door when he hears it - but nowadays (he's 2) he no longer makes a dash for it.

Do the bracket and netting thing pictured up thread right round the top of your garden fences and they can't get out and other cats can't get in. Which is nice! Done it successfully in two houses now. Net over any fancy iron sidegates too. Ours love a roll about in the sun and jump about after the grasshoppers. They don't bother even actually trying to get over the fence.

If your boundaries aren't fences and are hedges or similar then the catio is what you need i guess.

Here's our 2 year old 😍 They do calm down at 18 months ish OP.

Ragdolls are not bred to be indoor cats (I don't know of any cat that is, all the indoor cats I've known want to escape, but it's possible that there is some breed out there which really hates the outdoors - ragdolls aren't it). They are not suitable to be left to roam freely, but that is different from being kept indoors. You need a catio or to secure your garden against escape. It isn't fair on them to keep them indoors all the time.

Our vet told us to let our Ragdoll out - he was getting stress related cystitis as he wanted to go out and males are at risk of their bladder bursting with cystitis. He is much happier out but to be fair he’s a 6 kilo monster cat with very fluffy fur so other cats are very frightened of him. He’s actually quite a nervous cat but his natural instincts seems to kick in when other cats are around and he scares them off to the point we have not seen a strange cat in our garden for years.
hes a pure bred ragdoll from a registered breeder but he has tabby stripes and I know the ragdoll association introduced a tabby a few decades ago so maybe he’s more tabby than ragdoll. Still has bright blue eyes though

Oh i meant to add - we use the black or white B&Q large metal 'L' brackets (like you'd use to hang a hanging basket) and stretch black or dark green fruit mesh across the tops of them (buy a big roll on amazon) and pin the mesh down the fence a little bit and you're done. They won't jump onto the mesh because they can't really see it and they can't get up behind the mesh if you pin it to the fence. Cheaper than the official anti-cat fence topper.

As i say - for anyone wanting to deter cats this also works in reverse, Cats don't like stepping on the mesh to jump INTO your garden either.

note to self when my old girl goes

no ragdolls or maine coons

You've forgotten how much work kittens can be.
Catio.
Cat proof garden.
Lots of cat friendly place/retreats in house.
Large (very) cat tree, ceiling height with pods and sisal posts.
Interactive toy/evening play time with humans, followed by food reward (simulating prey reward after hunt).

Don't let them roam unless you want them stolen or killed. The biggest cause of death for domestic cats is RTA.

You need to find a way to let your kittens have outdoor access. That doesn't mean they have to free roam, but you could look at cat-proofing your garden or building a catio instead.

If they want to go out then let them out. All my cats Siamese and Tonkinese have been outside cats. They all lived to a ripe old age. They had a cat flap that only allowed them in and out as it was connected to their microchip. They came and went as they pleased. I personally think it is cruel to contain a cat to indoors if they want to go outside and yours certainly want to.

well, you could give them back. The breeder would probably take them and find them another good home. I don't think rehoming is a bad option if you can part with them - loads of people who are passionately in favour of ragdolls staying indoors would happily take on a pair of kittens. And when you are ready you could get a pair of moggie kittens.

Personally I would either get a catio, or the bracket and net catproofing for your back garden. There's a balance between risk and reward - the catproofing is more risky but having a bit of lawn, flowerbeds etc is usually much richer than what most people can provide in a mesh box. Your cats want to go out, I think you can give them a nice life. But then our last (pedigree but not ragdoll) cats were free range for years and died of old age, which I know isn't everyone's experience.

Question for those who have catios. Do cats feel restricted by the space or are they just pleased to be outside albeit in an enclosed space?

How to believably cruel to have cats that cannot live a free cat's life!!! Awful!!!

Most cats want to roam and explore. A catio is just an extension to the house like a prison cell with toys.

How does one breed a cat to be an inside cat? Going against thousands of years of evolution giving them claws for climbing, incredible athletic ability, superb hearing and predatory instincts for hunting. Sounds like nonsense to me.

The cats need to go out and have some fun. How miserable for them to be caged in your house all day.

I'd re home while they are still young and have more chance of being adopted!

The indoor cat thing also seems to be a slightly mad post-millennium thing. Never heard of it before mumsnet.