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Original poster

Primary policy. Girls must wear skirts?

101 replies

Skirtsonly · 14/09/2023 09:08

Can you help me word a letter around this issue?

My daughter (8) attends a school where the policy is shorts/shirts/jumpers for boys (only Yr 6 boys are allowed to wear trousers) and skirts/pinafore/shirts/cardigans for girls.

Last winter she wore one of her brothers handed down jumpers as she felt it was warmer than a cardigan, absolutely nothing was said.

This summer she took part in a show where she needed school shorts, and subsequently asked if she could wear them to school. She tends to spend half if her life upside down/cartwheeling etc. I didn't think there'd be an issue, and I'm pretty loathe to not use perfectly good clothing items.

But there is an issue. She's been told by several members of staff that she's not allowed to wear them. Nobody has approached me directly, but her dress is dirty (her skirt is at her dads house) She's put them on and was worried, so I've asked this morning at the school gate and have been told that she is not allowed to wear them. They agree they are the correct colour and the style would be fine if she were a boy. I've asked for a reason other than being a girl as to why she can't wear them and both the teacher and head teacher could not provide one other than she's a girl and therefore needs to wear a skirt. I can buy shorts to go under the skirt if I like.

I've politely said she will alternate between these her 1 dress and 1 skirt, I've pointed out there's a col crisis (they're aware I'm a single parent) and I'm not willing to spend more money on uniform when these are perfectly usable.

I need to submit a letter/email as to the reasons she's breaking policy? I'm not sure if I should just put what I have here or head down the route of the equality act? Would the act mean its unlawful to discriminate against a student based on their sex?

Or do I just ditch the shorts (despite the fact she is so much happier in them) and find the money to buy another dress/skirt?

OP posts:
TeenDivided · 14/09/2023 09:11

Private or state? UK or elsehwere?

If state in England I'd say they were unusual in not allowing girls to wear trousers/shorts.
However also unusual to not allow boys to wear trousers.

Needmorelego · 14/09/2023 09:11

They can't insist on skirts only for girls unless this is a private school.

Original poster
Skirtsonly · 14/09/2023 09:12

State school, in England, fairly disadvantaged area.

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Clothing General education General style & beauty Primary education
OMGitsnotgood · 14/09/2023 09:15

It's an interesting question as to whether it is legal to prevent girls from wearing shorts, or boys skirts, regardless of whether state or private. They are essentially treating them differently based on a protected characteristic.

AppaTheSixLeggedFlyingBison · 14/09/2023 09:15

Don't the boys get cold in the winter? I've never heard of a school not allowing trousers before.

Original poster
Skirtsonly · 14/09/2023 09:17

Yes, my DS (9) gets cold. They are allowed to wear trousers/joggers over the top of their shorts for the school run but must take them off once inside school.

OP posts:
SpamPie · 14/09/2023 09:20

https://x.com/UniformReformUK

These guys have a template letter somewhere.

https://x.com/UniformReformUK

GiraffeLaSophie · 14/09/2023 09:21

This summer she took part in a show where she needed school shorts, and subsequently asked if she could wear them to school. She tends to spend half if her life upside down/cartwheeling etc. I didn't think there'd be an issue, and I'm pretty loathe to not use perfectly good clothing items.

If the school policy is that girls must wear a skirt, a pinafore or a dress then why did you assume there wouldn’t be an issue? She’s breaking the uniform policy. It’s not a policy I agree with either, but that doesn’t mean you can ignore it without good reason. They’ve also said she can wear shorts under the skirt, so the cartwheeling isn’t an issue.

diggermama · 14/09/2023 09:22

ChatGPT could be your very useful friend here

LadyofLansallos · 14/09/2023 09:22

I thought that uniform in state primaries in England was not enforceable anyway?

side note tho, my DS chooses to wear shorts all year round, so obviously isn’t too cold!

Original poster
Skirtsonly · 14/09/2023 09:24

I naively assumed that given she wore a jumper all winter, when the policy states girls should wear a cardigan, that the same leniency would apply to the bottom half of her body as the top.

OP posts:
PuttingDownRoots · 14/09/2023 09:28

Get your daughter (with your help as shes only 8) to start a petition for the uniform options to be available to all the pupils. (Jumper/cardigan/skirt/trousers/shorts/dress)

becarefulofyourheart · 14/09/2023 09:29

Agree it’s an overly strict policy and requesting girls to wear skirts rather than giving an option to wear shorts also puts an extra financial burden on the parents of female children. Because if you’ve got a little girl acrobat you need to provide shorts as well.

however having put two through school I’ve come to the realisation often parenting is about whatever will make the kids’ lives easier rather than standing on a point of principle. Tell the school your financial position; if you can’t afford it you can’t afford it. Rather than teachers repeatedly making it an issue for a child who has no control over what they wear, they could provide her with a pre-worn skirt? Our school has boxes of unclaimed lost property and outgrown uniform for this purpose, maybe yours does too.

justanothernamechangemonday · 14/09/2023 09:34

When I was at secondary school (many, many years ago!!) our policy was skirts and socks - no tights or trousers. One day, almost every girl in my year decided enough was enough, so around 80% of us turned up in trousers or skirts with tights.

The policy changed the following week. Strength in numbers!!

Owl55 · 14/09/2023 09:34

I thought schools couldn’t stop girls wearing trousers now ( and maybe shorts) as it was discrimination

GiraffeLaSophie · 14/09/2023 09:37

Skirtsonly · 14/09/2023 09:24

I naively assumed that given she wore a jumper all winter, when the policy states girls should wear a cardigan, that the same leniency would apply to the bottom half of her body as the top.

Yes, that is unfortunate and it’s unhelpful of them to have not enforced that part of their policy when they have enforced this.

I still don’t think there’s much you can do about it though. My understanding is that when you send your child to a particular school then you are agreeing to their policies, barring exceptions for SEND, religion etc or genuine emergencies.

But I’m sure someone will correct me if I’m wrong!

FirstYouGetTheMoney · 14/09/2023 09:38

Skirtsonly · 14/09/2023 09:24

I naively assumed that given she wore a jumper all winter, when the policy states girls should wear a cardigan, that the same leniency would apply to the bottom half of her body as the top.

The school possibly feel that this is a case of “give them an inch and they’ll take a yard.”

I understand that it’s a bit annoying, but wouldn’t wearing the shorts under the skirt be a decent compromise?

honeylulu · 14/09/2023 09:40

It's a silly policy and I agree you should write and challenge it. It's discrimination surely.

My kids are nearly a decade apart in age but went to the same primary school. The uniform list when my son was there listed uniform items for boys (shorts, trousers) and girls (dresses, skirts). After some requests by the time he reached year 5 or 6 girls had trousers added to "their" list.

Several years on the uniform list simply states "pupils may wear ..." and lists all the items non sex specifically. Quite right. So in theory boys could wear skirts if they want though I haven't seen any yet. (Might happen!)

A bit off topic but a note about cardigans. The infant years are allowed cardigans or jumpers. Due some reason most of the girls chose cardigans and I think they look awful, scruffy and sloppy, hanging off one arm (daughter is a right scruffbag). In the juniors only jumpers ate allowed and it looks so much nicer!

elsiemayline · 14/09/2023 09:42

Even our local girls private school has a uniform option for girls to wear shorts or trousers. Even when I was at a girls school 20 years ago the girls could wear trousers. Ridiculous that this isn't the case in this day and age.

Redebs · 14/09/2023 09:42

This is bizarre.
No school in UK would prevent girls or boys from wearing trousers.

Justgonefishing · 14/09/2023 09:44

very unusual...is it a small rural school?!? seeing as our primary school had a least 2 girls living as boys, i cant imagine them trying to enforce this policy but we are a city school and i know certain areas of the country remain far more traditional.

Scaredycatttt · 14/09/2023 09:44

Utterly bonkers uniform policy, they would get a ton of complaints at our school if they didn't at least allow trousers.

Tell them she's gender fluid?

BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 14/09/2023 09:50

GiraffeLaSophie · 14/09/2023 09:37

Yes, that is unfortunate and it’s unhelpful of them to have not enforced that part of their policy when they have enforced this.

I still don’t think there’s much you can do about it though. My understanding is that when you send your child to a particular school then you are agreeing to their policies, barring exceptions for SEND, religion etc or genuine emergencies.

But I’m sure someone will correct me if I’m wrong!

Show quote history

You are wrong. State primary schools in England are not allowed to enforce uniform rules.

TropicalTrama · 14/09/2023 09:52

What a weird uniform policy for a state school! My DC are at a private which is similar and very strict but they don’t say ‘boys’ or ‘girls’ it’s uniform A (skirt, blouse, cardigan) or uniform B (shorts, shirt, tie, jumper) and you can choose either but no mixing of A and B is allowed. I know of one girl that wears B, no boys wear A.

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