Slim women. Do you work at it?

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I always thought slim women could just eat whatever they liked naturally. But looking at the eating habits of my slim friends, they don’t seem to eat whatever they like - they are constantly making healthy, low cal choices and I can’t shake the feeling it’s deliberate in order to stay slim, rather than them just actually fancying the lower cal option.

is this your experience? Is this what slim women have to do forever? When did you start doing this and do you find it easier now?

I agree with this. There are so many diets out there that complicate what should be a simple relationship with food.

in a way all diets are fad diets. The body sends us signals about what it needs (but eating disorders override the signals).

I have an 18m old and am a single mother so I have no time or money to eat to be honest. I never have breakfast and split lunch in half and have half for dinner. On the days I have my son I usually manage to grab some fries at about 4pm usually on the way home from wherever we’ve gone. I’m too exhausted to cook dinner for myself.

I guess it’s how important food is and how your body handles being hungry. I lose my appetite very quickly through stress anyway and can cope with not eating that much, which has done wonders for my figure.

Nope. I'm naturally slim (50kg) and don't have to watch what I eat at all. I expect that to change as I age but for now I enjoy it (although I read its actually good for your health to put on some extra weight in middle age). I exercise for health reasons and have cut out sugary drinks as they're bad for my teeth but I always eat as much as I want to.

I have a good awareness of when I'm full and don't eat if I'm not hungry. Whether this is genetic or stems from how my parents brought me up idk.

nurse at my health check up when measuring my waist said I wish i had a small waist. She was probably 20 years younger than me. Setting aside the fact that a health professional shouldn’t be commenting on physical appearance unless linked to health, there was no reason why she couldn’t have a smaller waist!

Oh dear, are we now denying that people are all different shapes?

I was slim in my 20s, I had a very active job and ate what I wanted. In reality that was croissants and pizza and Burger King! Maybe a sandwich for lunch. I don't recall being a big snacker I wasn't particularly regimented about meal times, I was hunger led. I did try and eat what I thought were grown up healthy choices like pasta or fish and veg. I had no car and walked everywhere. From this diet I did learn that too much wheat blocks my sinuses.

I went abroad and put on some weight due to environmental factors i.e. available choices.

My weight stayed like this until early 30s when I got a sedentary job then it crept up. I only really started to look at calories in mid 30s, until then I think I took pride in not having a clue.

When I did look at my diet it was more with a view to understanding the nutritional and vitamin content of food. I was trying to get away from grabbing a sandwich so I'd make my own salads etc. but in reality my intake was probably too low so I'd binge on chocolate and burgers.

This went on for ages until I finally got am exercise routine and increased my carb and protein intake so I am more satisfied and don't crave the sugar and fat. I'm slim but typically I eat three solid meals and two snacks...two eggs and toast and avocado, porridge, a large grain and protein bowl, yoghurt, fruit, nuts, olive oil, meat carb and veg for dinner would be a typical day for me, around 1800-2300 calories, I am 5.6 and in my BMI range, I don't often have food that is very high fat, refined sugar or refined carb and that just puts me on a rollercoaster of hunger, or I see immediate body fat gain (I'm 43). My body is a completely different composition now (it was 44% body fat and now it is 25% body fat). I also can't remember when I last had alcohol.

I would say - just my observation - very slim eaters sometimes get calories from alcohol or sugary treats. You can't survive on nothing. DM hardly eats much but has a can of cider every night.

I think 80-90% good is the aim in diet but many people underestimate the treats so it may be more like 60% good etc.

I don't believe you can fix diet alone without looking at daily activity levels of walking and doing some resistance training as muscle is more metabolically active and we lose muscle as we age - 0.5% a year. You don't need to physically look muscly, the back and core have lots of internal muscles that need to be strong.

Not sure if that helps but in short it was intuitive eating but more recently been environment and knowledge for me.

Before I had my son at 27 I was a size 8-10 and never had to work at it. Cue putting on weight during pregnancy I now am a size 12-14, however I still don't watch what I eat and have chocolate every day, so whilst I'm not slim, I'm not putting on weight. I don't have to work hard at all to maintain whatever weight I am at (10k steps a day and running around after a 4yo), but it'll be a slog to lose it for sure. My whole family is the same.

It's curious how the presumption is that eating unhealthily, snacking and over eating is the norm and default. If you don't eat this way you're deliberately working at being thin.

Indeed. The idea that not doing the above is an act of self-deprivation. I’m not a snacker, and never have been. I also don’t have a sweet tooth. Saying no to chocolate or sweets isn’t me denying myself, or demonstrating a strong will - I say no because I genuinely don’t want those things. If I order a salad at a restaurant I’m not ‘being good’ - I’m ordering what I want.

If I can also mention snacks- I never eat snacks at all- never have. (Just far too big meals and too much white carb which I have now cut down massively)

The number of people I see daily grabbing sausage rolls , muffins and bags of crisps or doughnuts mid afternoon is massive- and not just kids, and I don't think this concept that we need to be eating outside of meals has done much for the nations weight- I doubt these snacks are replacing meals- they are 'in addition to' -

Ditching snacks helps a lot.

The number of people I see daily grabbing sausage rolls , muffins and bags of crisps or doughnuts mid afternoon is massive- and not just kids, and I don't think this concept that we need to be eating outside of meals has done much for the nations weight- I doubt these snacks are replacing meals- they are 'in addition to' -

All these things are stopgaps if good satiating food is not available but they just put me on a blood sugar rollercoaster. So for me and possibly to most people the key to avoiding them is having good food available at the right time (which with busy lifestyles isn't always possible) , or they would very definitely be in addition to.

I’m pretty slim. Have been a size 10 for donkeys and I don’t have one of those naturally tiny frames that some women would have. What I am saying is my size is probably related to my behaviour and diet rather than genetics. I think it’s down to having a few rules of thumb that I stick to. Rarely bothering with dessert. Having a big breakfast but not snacking til lunch. Regularly exercising. No crash dieting or anything that makes the process miserable.

Portion size also a factor. Whilst I wouldn’t consciously think about stuff like this, I’ve observed people to eat the entire rice and curry you get with a takeaway, whereas invariably I would eat half a portion and finish the rest the next day.

I think slim people generally stop eating when they are full, don’t use food as an emotional prop and eat smaller portions.

Agreed. And certain types of food will leave you fuller, like protein, fibre, and fat (as long as you don't only eat fat).

I am a healthy weight, middle of BMI ‘healthy’ range, don’t look ‘fat’ , fit, got a bit of a muffin top. Tall, size 10.

I enjoy food but not in the way that I see lots of people revelling in massive portions. The cliched response to a huge plateful of roast dinner, people advocating places to eat because the portions are ‘huge’. (They are!). I am not interested in quantity, as long as I have enough and not left hungry, only the enjoyable quality. By which I don’t mean expensive or gourmet, I mean enjoyable to me. Really tasty, good ingredients, well cooked.

No judgement on people who do choose to eat more, their choice to manage as they will, none of my business. But for example many of the lists of what people eat on Christmas Day make me feel ill even to think about. I know it’s Christmas, I eat a lot at Christmas, but even so. Fine, they enjoy it, no one in my family ever over eats to that extent. And for the sake of it.

I do think we see big portions as being good. People doing the equivalent of ‘phwooooooar’ as overloaded platefuls arrive. Slices of cakes in cafes now are massive. I enjoy cake: I don’t want a huge slice as is usually served in a NT tea room for example.

So I’m not sure if I ‘work at it’ so much as don’t get sucked into the habits that mean I would have to work at it, iyswim.

People are different. I know people who can't get away with eating much at all without gaining fat. Others can eat a ridiculous amount and not gain fat. I've know. Women who could once eat anything and everything. Even they didn't know where it went. Then later in life they no longer could. A lot of it is genetics and a complete mystery. Then there are those who make specific choices.

And yes countless women find after the menopause they had to cut what they are massively to not gain weight. Even then many struggle. They could eat shot tons when younger and didn't think twice about what they ate.

I think this is exactly right. I got laughed at for leaving two to three bites of a meal because why not just eat it. But I didn't want it. I was full.

I got laughed at for leaving two to three bites of a meal because why not just eat it. But I didn't want it. I was full.

I do this - DH thinks I'm crazy because I will leave a tiny bite or a tiny amount of a meal when I am full! He hoovers up what i leave 😂

DH also thinks I am strange! And my sister's DP laughs at her for exactly the same reason.

I overeat when dh cooks. I've trained him into giving me - and him- smaller portions over the years, especially as I've realised I no longer need as much food as I did when I wasyounger. He will fill a pasta bowl with pasta if he serves, but if I do it, a cereal bowl is enough for me and I don't feel hungry. It blows his mind that we probably need less to eat than our teenagers (even though they're the rare, non sporty type not seen on mumsnet).

I'm slim and I work hard at being that way. The amount of people in my running group that say 'oh you must just have a fast metabolism' or 'you're okay you can eat what you like'. I work hard to be slim. If I ate what I wanted I'd put on weight.

Some people actually like that feeling of being stuffed after a big meal too, whereas I HATE feeling overfull. I'd far rather be hungry than overfull. But I was talking to a family member recently and he said he loved that feeling. It was a bit of a lightbulb moment for me, because I'd assumed that everyone finds it unpleasant, like I do.

My BMI is about 21.
I get a lot of exercise. I eat like a pig.
Except... when I don't. I couldn't eat at all if I didn't exercise. Food doesn't taste nice if you're not hungry. I don't eat if I'm not hungry because that would be wasted calories. Food is way too lovely to waste calories on food that doesn't taste nice. Better to wait until actually hungry.

I try to eat a lot of veg & fruit.

i was a plump teen, btw. Ate out of nerves, then.

My BMI is about 21.
I get a lot of exercise. I eat like a pig.

I do think lazy people downplay the importance of exercise in weight loss. Yes, 'you can't outrun a bad diet' but for sure I feel a LOT hungrier when I've been very active.