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That World Cup kiss

331 replies

mids2019 · 26/08/2023 08:03

The news about the world cup is being dominated by an unsolicited kiss on the lips on a Spanish player. I do not want to condone the rather bizarre and overly personal celebration of the head of Spanish football (idiot) but I do feel the whole matter has drawn focus away from the football on the pitch and made the hugely successful world cup a feminist issue where discussions are now revolving around appropriate behaviour between men and women rather than the actual sport.

Young girl players instead of looking up to the heroic exploits of our players are now getting drawn into much more general discussions about personal limits and what constitutes assault. I think this is all a pity really.

OP posts:
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IClaudine · 26/08/2023 10:09

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 10:07

Also, it's different here (I live in Spain)
We greet people we barely know with a kiss on the cheek abd give a hug It's really common to greet people we do know with a kiss on the mouth.

This has been blown out of proportion and is making it a feminist agenda , taking away the glory of the winning team.

Can you explain then why he kissed all the others on the cheek? He must know all the players.

calimali · 26/08/2023 10:10

Women in Spain are comfortable with having their head held and being kissed on the lips by their boss? The are comfortable with men grabbing their groins to celebrate sporting success?

Really?

BIWI · 26/08/2023 10:10

I think you'll find that it was his actions that have taken the spotlight off the women's glory @Maddy70

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Nanny0gg · 26/08/2023 10:11

mids2019 · 26/08/2023 08:03

The news about the world cup is being dominated by an unsolicited kiss on the lips on a Spanish player. I do not want to condone the rather bizarre and overly personal celebration of the head of Spanish football (idiot) but I do feel the whole matter has drawn focus away from the football on the pitch and made the hugely successful world cup a feminist issue where discussions are now revolving around appropriate behaviour between men and women rather than the actual sport.

Young girl players instead of looking up to the heroic exploits of our players are now getting drawn into much more general discussions about personal limits and what constitutes assault. I think this is all a pity really.

And why not?

Or are you saying that she should just put up and shut up?

And how about his crotch-grabbing? That ok too?

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 10:11

IClaudine · 26/08/2023 10:09

Can you explain then why he kissed all the others on the cheek? He must know all the players.

Edited

I can't no. Excitement? Maybe he knew her better?

BIWI · 26/08/2023 10:12

Why is it that so many women - I'm assuming that you're also a woman @Maddy70 - are prepared to defend the inappropriate actions of men?

Regardless of whether or not you think it's a feminist issue, can you not see that it's unacceptable?

Nanny0gg · 26/08/2023 10:12

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 10:07

Also, it's different here (I live in Spain)
We greet people we barely know with a kiss on the cheek abd give a hug It's really common to greet people we do know with a kiss on the mouth.

This has been blown out of proportion and is making it a feminist agenda , taking away the glory of the winning team.

But Hermoso didn't like it.

Doesn't she get a say?

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 26/08/2023 10:12

mids2019 · 26/08/2023 09:46

@Judashascomeintosomemoney

no not a bloke and no I don't assault people. I think it's a bit rude to suggest I do.

Wut?
I didn’t accuse you of anything. I was asking which of Agapornis’ questions you were answering.
sheesh.

IClaudine · 26/08/2023 10:13

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 10:11

I can't no. Excitement? Maybe he knew her better?

But you just said it is common to kiss people you know on the lips as a greeting. Now you are saying that it depends on how well you know them?

Nanny0gg · 26/08/2023 10:13

LizzieSiddal · 26/08/2023 09:52

This is much bigger than “just a kiss”
The woman involved has said she did not like it, she did not consent and she and her family have been inundated with calls from the Spanish FA, telling them they should come out and support the man who did it. She also alludes to the fact the women players have had to put up with this kind of behaviour for years and they are absolutely fed up with it.

All the Spanish women players are refusing to play for the Spanish team until he goes.
Some of the male Spanish players have said they will not play either, until he goes.

So this is all an important lesson for girls everywhere- you do not need to put up with unwanted sexual behaviour. Brilliant imo.

And now she's being branded a liar Angry

dontgobaconmyheart · 26/08/2023 10:13

I'm not sure I'd be able to view it as a pity that young girls may take a moment to be inspired to strengthen their resolve when it comes to unwanted and forced contact/kisses from men or indeed the entire patriarchal system that we live in whereby 'not making a fuss' about it is seen as preferable to allowing it without one simply because a man wanted to do it and men can ordinarily get away with it.

Female football players are battling hard to win sports games yes but they are also facing and pushing back against much more entrenched social system to even have the right to play, to be paid equitably for it and to treated anything remotely equally to a male counterpart. The issue is a patriarchal society and not a woman quite correctly standing up for herself, or the countless members of the public worldwide who saw it and didn't like it.

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 26/08/2023 10:14

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 10:07

Also, it's different here (I live in Spain)
We greet people we barely know with a kiss on the cheek abd give a hug It's really common to greet people we do know with a kiss on the mouth.

This has been blown out of proportion and is making it a feminist agenda , taking away the glory of the winning team.

Not wanting to be assaulted is a ‘feminist agenda’? Good to know…

IClaudine · 26/08/2023 10:15

I hope the Spanish FA do sue. I am sure that will bring all sorts of murk to light. I will happily donate to a crowd funder if Hermanos needs money.

aurynne · 26/08/2023 10:17

I'm Spanish born and bred and no, being kissed on the lips is not "a normal getting" either for men or for women. Even less when the "greeting" is preceded by your head being forcibly held. Please stop saying nonsense about this shit being customary. It's not

Puffypuffin · 26/08/2023 10:18

So, because you didn't mind this, you think it's fine for men to kiss other women, without permission, who may actually mind? But it's ok because you don't mind ... These silly women should just pipe down, it's just a bit of fun eh?

I have taught my daughter the opposite.

Lottapianos · 26/08/2023 10:20

Dear god give me strength. A woman is grabbed by the head and kissed, in broad daylight, on live TV, in front of millions. She's clearly not comfortable, and not leaning in to the kiss. She later clarifies repeatedly that she did not consent, did not want any part of it, and that this is just the latest in a pattern of appalling behaviour from male leadership in her industry. And STILL people don't believe her, and she's being painted as the baddie who must be punished

And still some of you talk about 'feminism' like it's a dirty word. Open your eyes

aurynne · 26/08/2023 10:22

*a normal greeting even. Damn autocorrect.

saffronsoup · 26/08/2023 10:23

s

Interesting news story of a coach's wife who grabs and hugs and kisses the players as a way of motivating them...

Also all very non consensual but told in a very different way.

Megan Mullen helping change the culture at Florida

Megan Mullen helping Florida head coach Dan Mullen change the culture at Florida

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=8s&v=fchIrXTJeyk

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 10:23

IClaudine · 26/08/2023 10:13

But you just said it is common to kiss people you know on the lips as a greeting. Now you are saying that it depends on how well you know them?

Read what I said ........

Nandocushion · 26/08/2023 10:25

Read this on Twitter today: "Spanish striker Borja Iglesias announces he will not play for the Spanish national team in support of the women's national team after Luis Rubiales refused to resign as RFEF president.

“As a footballer and as a person, I do not feel represented by what happened today… I have made the decision not to return to the National Team until things change and this type of act does not go unpunished.”

Hopefully other male players will follow his lead and support her - I doubt they will ever be sued.

medianewbie · 26/08/2023 10:26

Anotherchristianmama · 26/08/2023 08:46

It's an incredibly important discussion. Very few of our daughters will end up as professional sportswomen. All of our daughters will have men pushing and trampling on their boundaries.

Yes yes yes !!!
Very well said.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 26/08/2023 10:26

I'm amazed and appalled by the number of people who are minimising what happened here. Why should a woman have to just put up with unwanted physical contact of this nature?

Yes, I absolutely agree that it's shameful that the achievements of those female players has been overshadowed by a story of sexual assault carried out by one man. However, the answer to that cannot simply be to sweep the sexual assault under the carpet and pretend that it never happened!!

Are female sportspeople simply to accept that, if they want their moment in the spotlight and for the focus to be on their sporting achievements, then the price that they will have to pay for that is quietly sucking up any male behaviour that crosses their boundaries so that they don't draw attention to it?

Sorry, but that's bullshit. She did not consent to the kiss. She has an absolute right to object to it and I'm pleased to see so many standing in solidarity alongside her.

saffronsoup · 26/08/2023 10:27

It is interesting to read the different perspectives. Some seem to think it was inappropriate because of the sex of each party. That because he was a man and she was a woman, this is inappropriate. That it wouldn't be in any other combination of sexes but that this combination makes it inappropriate. There seems to be a lot of emphasis on him being male and her being female in some posts. More so than seeing the action itself as inappropriate (regardless of the sexes involved)

WhatapityWapiti · 26/08/2023 10:27

It’s a huge shame that the action of a pervy man is tainting what should be a euphoric time for Jenni Hermoso, winning the World Cup. Her abiding memory will be being assaulted and branded a liar. Well done chaps.

Natty13 · 26/08/2023 10:31

Very interesting that a lot of posters who are all over threads about "Karens" complaining it's misogynistic and a term used to silence women are also on here effectively saying a woman being forcably kissed by her manager needs to put up and shut up 🤔

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