Why is ‘Kind regards’ a bad sign off

[SuperiorM]

So, I’ve just heard that ‘Kind Regards’ is considered passive aggressive. Maybe I’m just old and out of touch but it sounds more like a more friendly’Best wishes’ to me. I suppose I’m going to have to stop using it.

I dunno. I would've thought she's trying to save YOU the time of having to open the email.

I usually say best regards, I use kind regards for next-step-up in terms of formality

Surely they would just Teams you? I really struggle with email being the channel for informal requests.

At our firm for sure it should be a filed email if we're potentially going to rely on it in future. If not...SEND ME A TEAMS MESSAGE AND SPARE MY INBOX THANKS* *

I fins best regards a bit jarring. What are best regards?

I’d be really interested in this. Can you share more details?

I'd be absolutely happy to, in time. I'd say publication is about a year off as we're still gathering data / writing.

It's a collaboration between me & a colleague, working in 2 different Irish universities. It's based on a specific work environment but I think would be more broadly relevant to teams / middle managers in other contexts. My part is the practical data / evidence & my other colleague is working more on the theory / lit review. It's not core to either of our work so we are gradually progressing it.

It has been really interesting! If you want to DM me I'll share the publication details - assuming it gets there in some timely fashion!

I have done this occasionally, if the message is something very simple such as ‘would you like a break?’ ( assuming they work in a different office or whatever), but my thinking has been that it will save the recipient time, not having to open the message. I hadn’t considered it might be annoying, so this thread is very useful!

I'd agree with you if I hadn't experienced this from a colleague sitting diagonally from me. It's insulting that they couldn't take the time to stand up and use their words.

I dunno. I would've thought she's trying to save YOU the time of having to open the email.

No, I think using the subject line is ok for something like 'can you pop into me?' (Tho we'd use Teams Chat for that)

But for anything else it's obnoxious.

Or the emails that just end in ….

Best,

Best? What kind of gibberish is that?

I’ve known this one guy professionally for 5 years now. I see him weekly and he is so nice and friendly face to face but via email he is very “professional” to the point it comes across as a bit stand-offish! He always signs off with “regards” and it always makes me feel like I’m being told off!

HNRTFT but I always use yours sincerely if I personally know the person and yours faithfully if the person is a stranger. Kind regards is some where in the middle.

@Beenhereforever1978

Yes! With you on using Teams. It's a work-in-progress in my place tho.

Most colleagues hate it.

I insist on it being used in my team - and colleagues are gradually seeing the benefit.

@Clafoutie

Cross-post but in your example, I agree. Something v quick / info based is fine!

@SpaceRaiders I find it curt when they just put my name though - not Dear Pickledmuffin or Hi Pickledmuffin.

Same, WE DO NOT NEED ELEVENTY THOUSAND EMAILS FOR SOMETING THAT COULD HAVE BEEN A TEAMS SHOUT.

And no, I will not send out a tracker induvidually to 18 people. Its on the team. They can update it....

I really didn’t know this - I’ve always used just ‘Regards’ to everyone on emails, and only ever our ‘dear (name)’ on more formal emails, otherwise just put the name.

But then I probably am quite rude and have been known to put ‘ACT pls…(subject)’ in the title when action is required.

I just use "Regards".....and have done for the last 30+ years.

I had no idea it is considered passive aggressive!

I use kind regards, have for years. Unless person is being a dick then I use regards.

I doubt anyone knows or cares I am seething at my keyboard and taking off the ' kind' it makes me feel better though.

Best regards are like kind wishes, for the pps who asked! 😂

When did good morning or good afternoon start? Never used to be a thing. I'm sure it's not the intention of the sender, but it has the same effect of just 'my name,' which makes me feel like I've done something wrong.

I'm all for quickly dropping salutations and signing off asap in a chain of emails - in this age of instant messaging I can't be arsed with it.

At my workplace, we still sometimes receive emails addressed to ‘Dear Sirs’ 🙄

Quick question:

If you worry about how your sign off comes across, how do you consider yourself in context of the people you're dealing with?

Is it colleagues or clients or both?

I doubt anyone knows or cares I am seething at my keyboard and taking off the ' kind' it makes me feel better though.

😆I do things like this too!

There's just no good solution to this for me. I go round the houses and I can't find anything that works for formal email communication.

Regards is stiff and cold.
Kind regards to me sounds unbearably inauthentic if delivered to someone you've never met or barely know. You can't feel authentic kindness towards someone you're emailing for the second time to chase a printer cartridge so why bother pretending? Anything involving the word "kind" sounds so fake it sticks in the throat.
Best wishes makes you sound like you have a rod up your arse.
All the best is a sign-off for football managers or the head of ad sales at the local newspaper.
Best is a middle aged dad trying to be down with the kids.

There is nothing I can bring myself to use without feeling like a dick.

I usually default to "regards" because its the least offensive but no we're being told its pass-ag. Will someone please come up with an inoffensive sign-off that doesn't sound like you've walked out of 1956.

It's totally fine. I don't take that as passive aggressive at all

Totally this!