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Original poster

Grandparent ignored grandchild on the street!

55 replies

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 20:33

recently I’ve posted on here about my daughter grand parent being absent from her life. Today I saw her when I was pushing my daughter along the street I was on the other side of the road I stopped to see if she’d stop and come and see her. But no she saw us and carried on walking. So at this point I got annoyed for my daughter who is 2 year old and can’t speak for herself I shouted are you just going to ignore your granddaughter. And she tried to carry on walking and point blank ignored me.
i think I have my answer I’m hurt for my daughter.

OP posts:
Nanny0gg · 23/08/2023 21:26

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:25

Because she’s her grandparent and she complains to her son that she doesn’t see her but has clearly just ignored her in the street!

So ignore her!
Go no contact and stay no contact

Winnipeggy · 23/08/2023 21:28

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:25

Because she’s her grandparent and she complains to her son that she doesn’t see her but has clearly just ignored her in the street!

Then...gently, it's you she doesn't want to see. There's obviously a lot of bad feeling and she didn't want to engage with you. It's up to your ex to arrange for them to spend time together, I would completely stay out of it.

SummerInSun · 23/08/2023 21:28

How's her eyesight? My MIL had terrible eyesight and terrible hearing, but refused to do anything about either. Is it possible she didn't see you - or at least couldn't hear you well enough to recognise you across the street (without my glasses I couldn't recognise my husband sitting on the sofa next to me!) and didn't realise the calling out was directed at her?

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yogasaurus · 23/08/2023 21:30

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:25

Because she’s her grandparent and she complains to her son that she doesn’t see her but has clearly just ignored her in the street!

It’s you. She wants to see her with her son, presumably.

She doesn’t want to see you

MotherOfGodWeeFella · 23/08/2023 21:32

Well your response was hardly going to encourage her was it? "Hello, how are you doing?" might work better than haranguing her publicly about ignoring her grandchild. Just a suggestion.

Lilithlogic · 23/08/2023 21:32

I'm not surprised she won't interact with you, you are bullying her. It's up to your daughters dad to facilitate her seeing her granddaughter not you.

MariaAshley · 23/08/2023 21:32

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:25

Because she’s her grandparent and she complains to her son that she doesn’t see her but has clearly just ignored her in the street!

You don't have to get involved in her moaning. It doesn't matter whether she's telling the truth or not, her relationship with her son is nothing to do with you. Maybe she wants her son to bring the child to see her so she can see them both together. Maybe she doesn't like you. Who knows. It doesn't matter.

Maybe he's lying to you when he tells you she moans she never sees DD and she didn't actually do that. If he mentions it again, ask him not to or just ignore him. You don't have to listen to him moaning either, he can sort out his own relationship with his mum.

Don't take responsibility for, and try to sort out, things that aren't your responsibility. People can try to put everything on women, that doesn't mean you have to be everyone's fixer. They can fix their own problems. This is all someone else's drama and you're getting sucked into it, stay out of it and life will be easier.

CantThinkOfANameAtAll · 23/08/2023 21:42

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:25

Because she’s her grandparent and she complains to her son that she doesn’t see her but has clearly just ignored her in the street!

Then it's you she is trying to avoid. And if somebody shouted at me in the street and had a toxic relationship with my own child I'd run a mile too.

It's nothing to do with the child/grandparent relationship, it's you. You need to accept that she wants absolutely nothing to do with you. If you want her to know her grandchild you need to get her father to facilitate it.

onetimeonlyipromise · 23/08/2023 21:43

You have said a couple of times that you are speaking up for your daughter as she can't speak for herself.

If GP was at a distance, and DD hasn't seen her since she was little, DD wouldn't know she was there. So she wouldn't have been upset that GP didn't speak to her.

DD is likely to get upset when her mother is shouting across the street at someone and is upset/annoyed. That will have a negative effect on her.

Don't get caught up in this issue with GP. Leave it alone and focus your attention on moderating your responses to frustration and upset. This will benefit your DD far more.

Saschka · 23/08/2023 21:47

yogasaurus · 23/08/2023 21:30

It’s you. She wants to see her with her son, presumably.

She doesn’t want to see you

Edited
Show quote history

Yep, this. She’s not ignoring her grandchild, she’s giving a wide berth to the fishwife shrieking at her in the street. I would cross the road to avoid a further confrontation with you too honestly, you sound unhinged.

This is your ex’s mum. Leave it to your ex to sort out seeing her. Stop harassing her when you see her in public.

Original poster
Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:51

She certainly did ignore her grandchild. If she was mature enough she would of been civil with me to come over and see her grandchild whatever problem she had with me you don’t take it out on the child do you? I’m defiantly not unhinged either. So take your horrible comments off my post

OP posts:
SpamFrittersYouSay · 23/08/2023 21:57

If you'd been mature enough you wouldn't have shouted across the street.

There's clearly a backstory.
Would love to see it but can't find your other posts.

I wonder what this lady's version of events would read.

Lilithlogic · 23/08/2023 21:58

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:51

She certainly did ignore her grandchild. If she was mature enough she would of been civil with me to come over and see her grandchild whatever problem she had with me you don’t take it out on the child do you? I’m defiantly not unhinged either. So take your horrible comments off my post

Can you not see the irony of you calling her immature. Yelling in the street like some lowlife, claiming it's on behalf of your child, when really it's about you being controlling.

Sirzy · 23/08/2023 21:58

You could turn that around that you could have crossed the street and spoken to her like a mature adult.

your posts on here really aren’t painting you in a good light. I don’t blame her for not wanting to engage with someone willing to shout across the street like you did

Original poster
Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:59

There’s no back story she doesn’t bother with her grand child and is playing the victim to people but then ignores her on the street. She was just going to ignore my daughter of course I was going to say something

OP posts:
Lilithlogic · 23/08/2023 22:01

"DO AS I SAY, OTHERWISE I'LL YELL AT YOU!!!!!!" yeah, I bet you have form for that sort of behaviour and that's the reason she tries to stay away from you. You should start looking at yourself for the reason why your child's grandmother is not in her life.

WandaWonder · 23/08/2023 22:01

If you shouted at me I would have done the same, I can see why she is staying away.

It may help to calmly talk to her and if she doesn't want too leave it at thar

CantThinkOfANameAtAll · 23/08/2023 22:02

She's ignoring you. If your child was with anybody else she would have come over. It's you. Time for you to grow up and accept that.

Saschka · 23/08/2023 22:03

Backstory:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/4813944-grandparent-wont-come-and-visit-my-daughter

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4846269-unsure-and-confused

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4809157-advice-please

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/4876710-would-you-accept-a-gift-of-a-absent-grandparent

She’s blocked you everywhere, you insist she can only see her grandchild round at your parents house, she doesn’t want to go round there but is still sending gifts via your DC’s father (her son).

Have I missed anything?

You two don’t get on. You are shouting at her in the street. Of course she isn’t going to cross the road and approach you given the history.

Grandparent won’t come and visit my daughter | Mumsnet

Hi, my ex partners mother and father my daughters so called grand parents refuse to come and visit my daughter. I am currently living at my Parents ho...

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/4813944-grandparent-wont-come-and-visit-my-daughter

Lilithlogic · 23/08/2023 22:03

I'm afraid the OP is going to carry on spitting her dummy out and blaming everyone else apart from her own behaviour.

whatsappdoc · 23/08/2023 22:07

You're far too aggressive! When you saw she was going to ignore you why didn't you just smile and acknowledge her? That would be the only way she might cross the road to see your dd. If someone shouted at me the last thing I'd do would be to come over and be civil. As others have said, it's you she has a problem with not your dd.

Hellocatshome · 23/08/2023 22:07

There is no "of course I was going to say something" You said something because you wanted to cause a scene, get a reaction and have your say. None of which paint you in a good light.

Winnipeggy · 23/08/2023 22:08

Cheryl22x · 23/08/2023 21:51

She certainly did ignore her grandchild. If she was mature enough she would of been civil with me to come over and see her grandchild whatever problem she had with me you don’t take it out on the child do you? I’m defiantly not unhinged either. So take your horrible comments off my post

She's not taking anything out on the child, you're talking like a 2 year old understands what's going on and will feel upset to be ignored - this is nonsense. You control that situation and you could have walked straight on and your daughter wouldn't have known the difference. Your daughter does not understand, she saw you shouting at a stranger in the street so tbh the only person to have potentially upset her in this situation is you.

ineedsun · 23/08/2023 22:08

I don’t think it’s their grandchild that they’re avoiding. I think I’d avoid you too if this post is anything to go by.

Winnipeggy · 23/08/2023 22:12

OP, everyone is saying the same thing for a reason. There is no point in posting if you're not prepared to take comments on board.

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