Crohn’s Disease- humiliated by receptionist at doctors

[KnittingMania]

I’m at doc surgery rn waiting for my appt. I have Crohn’s Disease and have to access toilet unexpectedly up to 12 times a day or more. So Sod’s Law it happened while waiting here. Immediately after I exited the toilet, having tried my best to mitigate odours by cleaning etc, the receptionist bustled out and went straight into toilet, huffed loudly, went elsewhere with lots of door banging and came back with air freshener. She then sprayed it not just in toilet but throughout the reception kind of passageway that is in clear view of the waiting area.

I cannot help being ill. I avoid so many things bc of this miserable and embarrassing illness. I thought I could feel safe at doc’s. They could provide air freshener in the toilet. But my point is wider- no one should be shamed by their illness in a doc surgery.

I would like to complain. Should I? It’s kind of embarrassing doing this. But I feel she should learn and raise her levels of understanding.

I would definitely complain op! It's obvious people only use the GP loo out of desperation as they're usually not terribly private as in close to the waiting room so if people use them and leave an odour, it was likely through urgency to go.

@KnittingMania FWIW I would have complained about the receptionist for you had I have been there.

I have no problem smelling your poo but as a chronic migraine sufferer, her spraying the waiting area would likely have triggered a migraine for me.

I would much rather natural smells, and lets face it in a DR surgery it can well be puke or poo than horrible artificial migraine inducing air freshener smells.

Definitely complain OP, that's not ok and I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

Tbh I'd be livid if some dick started spraying air freshener around a waiting room to make some passive aggressive point. Absolutely vile stuff. People poo, and in a GP surgery you're going to have people using the loo urgently. The whole thing could be solved with one or two products left in there and a small amount of decency from the staff.

Obviously the PPs suggesting VIPoo haven't dealt with crohns, you shouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable or judged because of an illness.

Bloody hell, there are some heartless childish fuckers on this thread. Grow up, FGS. It's poo. Everyone does it. Sometimes you've got to go urgently even if you don't have a medical condition. Why on earth should anyone be made to feel ashamed or humiliated for needing to do something that literally everyone has to do every day? I can't believe how unkind and insensitive some people on this thread are. You're the ones who should be ashamed of yourselves, not the OP.

OP, please do write to the practice manager about what happened. I'm so sorry you have to deal with people like her, and more of them on this thread, over and above your illness which is no doubt already painful and distressing enough.

Thinking about it, I have never used a toilet at a general practice or hospital where there has been a window. They're not usually located in areas where that would be feasible.

And you're right, people are more likely to be ill/disabled in that setting, so unpleasant toilet smells are more likely to happen there.

I'm not sure there's a solution. It seems really poorly thought out.

I used a toilet yesterday where a sanitary disposal bin had been wedged into the space between the dividing wall and the toilet, and because it didn't fit, the toilet seat was slightly overlapping it, and you couldn't actually open the damn bin.

People who design toilets never seem to consider they need to be used as... well... toilets.

It's not your fault, OP. You didn't choose to be ill, and I'm sure you left the toilet in as clean a state as you could. You can wipe down the seats... you can't magically make the smell disappear.

Shaming someone for being ill in a clinical setting is terrible.

I've never used VIPoo but from what I understand, it creates an oily film on the water, so that when your healthy, firm sausage of shit plops into the water and sinks below the surface, the odours are trapped beneath the film.

I don't have Crohn's but I do have coeliac disease. If I'd been glutened but — somehow — managed to have the time to spray stuff in the loo beforehand, I can't imagine it could do very much to mitigate me the fact I'm gonna be spraying half a litre of liquid yellow shit all over the inside of the toilet bowl.

People with conditions that cause inconvenience and even disgust to others are usually acutely aware of this and do whatever we can to mitigate that. And it's understandable that sometimes people might need to come and deal with the problem we've unavoidably caused, if we couldn't for whatever reason (e.g. no access to staff cleaning supplies). But it sounds like this member of staff was unnecessarily ostentatious about the whole thing, and the air freshener spraying would piss me off even if I weren't the shitter — I like breathing, thanks, even if it's smelly.

Really sorry you had to experience that anywhere but you should definitely never have that experience in a health setting. Yes, you should definitely raise it with the practice. Hope you are ok xx

You are right not to expect humiliation. Write that letter.
Everyone could use an empathy top-up, every now and then

Absolutely out of order, especially in a GP surgery of all places. I agree with others to email the practice manager so they can learn this isn't acceptable (not that someone in a caring role should have to be told). Even if you didn't have a medical condition it shouldn't be how people are treated anywhere and I can see why you're upset. I used to work on a gastro ward and of course the toilets and some of our duties involved poo, never ever made anyone feel bad for what is a natural function, plenty of ways to maintain hygiene and someone's dignity at the same time.

Definitely complain. She works in a GP surgery so she really needs to be used to unwell people and have a bit if tact about it.

Not quite the same; but I once complained about a lady working in an opticians who, when I told her about my incurable, progressive, eye disease, (which I can sometimes get upset about) loudly told the technician that my results would be 'weird and wonderful'. I felt really upset and humiliated and left straight away, and then complained by email later on.

I think that your experience is far more humiliating than mine. You should definitely complain.

@BBno4

No reason for the receptionist to react the way she did. She could have easily slipped into the toilet with the air freshener out of OP's sight. The way she handled it was nasty.

Thank you again for the vast majority of kind, understanding and helpful replies. I feel so much better because of you 😊 Humiliation kind of comes with the territory for Crohns but you don’t expect unusually awful behaviour in a healthcare setting. I will write to the practice manager, borrowing some of the good phrases in the comments!

Poor you, OP.

The receptionist should have been more discreet. And I’d also complain about her liberal use of air freshener. It does nothing of the sort, makes a bad smell worse in my opinion and can be very irritating to some.

Also, as others have pointed out, she acted completely ignorantly of any other health conditions people in the waiting room may have had that would have been triggered by the air freshener - e.g. migraines, skin, asthma. You should definitely mention this as well. Someone could have ended up leaving in an ambulance if they had respiratory issues when the air freshener was sprayed.

@Neonyellowfish

I'm sure someone who has asthma doesn't want to spend the next few days in hospital after the receptionist sprayed air freshener everywhere.

@Neonyellowfish it must 'have' been bad.

I think you'll find stupidity lingers a little too.

Some of the comments on here are disgusting.
I have ulcerative colitis and been in OP's position before. There was a time when I was literally living in the bathroom as kept needing to go. Nobody understands how horrible that is to go through, physically or mentally. The fact people can judge and demand we carry spray around is something else.
OP. I hope you get an apology and hope you feel better soon x

There are some very unkind people on this thread. I’m appalled at the behaviour of the receptionist. And fully agree with a previous poster who said that their usual practice is to wait till the person has left and then do a cleaning routine including other areas of the waiting room so as not to single out a particular issue.
For those of you saying why didn’t you bring Vi-poo - should the OP have delayed her medical appointment with a flare of Crohns to on line shop for fragrant drops in case her painful and debilitating illness should offend someone using a public bathroom? If you’re so offended by bodily smells don’t use public toilets ( esp in a health care setting) or bring your own fragrance..
Definitely complain to the practice manager and GP

I'm sure someone who has asthma doesn't want to spend the next few days in hospital after the receptionist sprayed air freshener everywhere.

Indeed, if I was at the GP with an asthma flare a load of air freshener would have me in a real state. Awful stuff.

She was really insensitive and humiliated you in front of others
It's part of her job role to be pleasant and discreet
It's easy with hindsight to say" I'm here in a medical building because I'm unwell and you upset me" Mention it to the GP as he has a chance to feedback to her and complain to the practice manager by email

I am so sorry this happened to you @KnittingMania. How utterly lacking in empathy and discretion that silly woman must be. My son is only 10 and was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease in April. He is such a sensitive little soul and that sort of performative reaction would be excruciating for him. I agree with other that you should complain. At the very least, she needs to be trained in/reminded how to treat patients with dignity.

I'm so sorry this happened to you OP. I know complaining takes its toll but I do think it's worth doing, this is really not okay.

There are ways to use an air freshener that doesn't embarrass the person who has whatever has made the smell. Our gp surgery was in a much smaller, older building, and when I used to take my dd for her weekly medication injection there was a patient who came at the same time who had a very bad leg ulcer. The smell was indescribable but the nurse would come and treat him, and once he left the building, she would then use a spray freshener. She would also air her room out as much as she could before we came in.
That receptionist was very rude and didn't need to made such a song and dance about doing what she did. For goodness sake you are at a gp surgery, not working in a beauty salon.
I hope you get some satisfaction from the practise manager @KnittingMania

I really hate it when mean spirited unkind people get jobs in clinical settings. Like go put your passive aggressive personality to use somewhere it's needed!

Sorry you were upset about the Receptionist's attitude but if air freshener was left in the toilet it would be stolen.