Would you wait to ttc to avoid a summer birthday

[justthinkingxx]

We want to try towards the end of this year and if we are lucky straightaway that would mean a summer birthday. I read it on here on other threads that people think it is the worst time to be born in, for the place in school year above all else

I can see some advantages though like maybe being off school for your birthday , always having good birthday weather , and importantly whilst cost of living is so high you would pay nearly a year less of childcare fees when lots of the first year of school is relaxed and play based anyway , so best of both worlds only you’re not paying for it ?

We’re in our mid20s so can wait if summer is truly disadvantageous !

Less to pay in nursery fees if they're born in the summer.

I know a few teachers who deliberately opt for summer borns. There are advantages - I am summer born and one of those in my mind was that people had a full 6 months to save up for your birthday and then Christmas😁.

Disadvantage of May/June is it's exam season. Disadvantage of late July / August is that everyone is on holiday so it's harder to organise celebrations.

There is lots of debate around the school year thing. Some people hold kids back a year but I think it depends on the child as to how well they cope. I actually love having a summer birthday.

We waited until January both times. I was an august baby. I did struggle being the youngest in the year. I missed the first year of school too, and spent a long time catching up. Also being the last in your group of friends to be able to drink etc is annoying 🤣

I did have some outdoor parties but it does also rain in august! Also lots of people on holiday. One thing I did like was never being at school on my birthday.

Ended up with February and March babies. Having their birthdays so close is also a pain. Plus long time to wait between February and Christmas. There are disadvantages with any time of year.

Bear in mind that babies come when they will and not to a timetable. It took 6 months to conceive DC1. Second time round I got pregnant immediately and had an October due date, but miscarried. My mum's due date with me was in September.

I love that you’re trying to plan to make life easier/more advantageous for your baby
but the reality is you’ll be happy whenever you have your baby
it can take a long time to conceive for many people

i have a winter baby and being pregnant in the summer was HARD. That’s the only thing I’d think of in future.

Working in a school I really wouldn’t say it matters. Yes some summer borns are slightly behind September borns (I would say only really noticeable in the first year or so of school) but also there are august babies who are so bright you wouldn’t guess and vise Versa, October borns who you would swear are august borns! They will catch up eventually and it’s really not that much of a big deal!

No. I'm a may baby and always did well in school/uni. I'm a teacher now. While some younger children can take a bit longer to settle initially it doesn't go for all and by the time they get to ks2 I couldn't tell you who was born when.

It never occurred to us when we were trying to conceive but looking back (ours are now between 12-16), I'm very glad we don't have a Dec/Jan born. My DH and my brother have birthdays late Dec and they're shit frankly.

Two of my DCs are early autumn, one July. ATM, they all like when their birthdays are. Older ones like being the eldest, youngest likes the fact school will all be over quicker 😅

There are pros and cons to all. Personally I would just avoid Christmas but if childcare fees are a thing for you, aim for that summer baby! Oh and concerts, definitely avoid clashing with a concert you've been looking forward to, we made that error 😂

God that sounds like me., Altough I am not bitter, but resigned. My birthday is Jan 3rd. As a child though the joint birthday things really pissed me off because although i dd not expect a gift, being flung one at me on christmas day from various irritated aunts with the words 'Oh it's a joint' just made me feel like no-one really gave a shit.

I don't tell anyone my birthday now. And i have never had an actual birthday party- not even as a child because my parents would say 'everyone's tired and skint after christmas'.

A Christmas birthday was the only thing I wanted to avoid. I wanted to be able to enjoy Christmas and not be about to give birth or a few days post birth.

We also have lots of Christmas birthdays in our family and buying all the presents at once is a ball ache. It’s so expensive. But that’s only 1 cycle we’d have to miss.

I wouldn’t TTC to avoid a summer born. If anything atleast you’ll have less nursery fees and lovely outdoor birthday party’s.

Wish it was that easy to plan. Both my DDs are August birthdays. Think I just only ovulate once a year. 😂😂😂 I’m a teacher and people always joke I should have known better to have August birthday kids but really, not always that easy. After over a year trying to conceive with eldest we were referred for investigations. Eventually I did fall pregnant naturally but I was told I have PCOS (which I kind of knew and the doctors ruled out due to my bloods not being exact what PCOS bloods would be). Second time round we tried and struggled again and have a 3 year gap. Baby was due September which I thought would be great, older child and all that. Nope, she came early towards the end of August. However I will just say she has just received greater depth scores in her y6 SATs so not all summer babies are going to do badly in exams and school. It made me even more prouder of her knowing that some kids in that class are 11.5 months older than her and getting the same and lower test scores. Eldest has always been on top groups too but is autistic so struggles with other things.

so, plan all you like, but you might not be fully able to control everything. It’s great that they never have school on their birthdays but it’s always been harder to organise their parties when younger as a lot of their friends would be away on holiday, or just forget. The weather isn’t always great - we hired a beach hut one year and it rained all day!! Kids still had fun but we stopped planning with an assumption of decent weather after that. I know some of her peers had done 2 extra terms at pre school than she did, some even more as that particular one did take them as soon as they turned 3 rather than the following term. This meant that some friendship groups in that class were already established so my DDs ended up naturally making friends with the younger kids. They all went up to reception together. She also made friends with some of the older kids in the year below who had started nursery just after her but then didn’t go up to reception. There can be some obvious maturity issues in the younger years. Pressures from toilet training were a bit of a nightmare for us as pre school wanted no nappies and both started a couple of weeks after turning 3 and one was definitely not ready.

What the actual fuck? Is this serious?!

Jeez.

100%. Having had a summer born boy, I’d never recommend it. It has made his school journey very difficult. In a country where they start at 6 it probably wouldn’t be an issue - but not when you can start school at just 4.

DD has an August birthday and was so pleased to go to school early as she loved it(until secondary) she was never behind academically.

I have 2 summer born children.
They are both fully formed, functioning human beings.
One got above average GCSE results, the August born aced hers.
Obviously, I can't categorically state that they would have been any different had they been born in September and October, but I don't think they would have been 🤔

My birthday is late July and the only issue I had at school was when lots of people in the year had already passed the driving test before I could legally start driving . Academically it was never an issue for me .

There are so many factors aren't there? My DC are Christmas Day and October. They were both more than ready for school but I know September babies who have struggled and summer borns who have got on great starting reception a week or so after turning 4. And Christmas day is a rubbish birthday so I would encourage abstinence for the month of March!

The funded hours at 3 make a big difference and my friend's son's birthday is in April but even though it's sometimes in Easter he didn't get his until the September cause Easter moves so much so I think it's end of March where they draw the line. I work PT and the cost of wraparound is more that the nursery bill when they were in preschool with the funding so the assumption that its all free once they're in school is a little misplaced. February/March are nice birthdays but it's swings and roundabouts as they say.

Arguably Scotland has a better system.

I just can't get my ahead around this!
What if you do manage to conceive with a due date of whatever month you plan and they are born early/late?? Worked with a smug lady who was expecting in sept and gloating about them being ahead of their peers etc - baby came early in aug much to mum's disgust.
It horrifies me that people put so much value on this. I am mum to a July born son who is 17 on Sunday and there couldn't be a more awesome human on this planet. He aced 8 gcses and is predicted distinctions in his higher BTEC. He is probably the most emotionally intelligent and thoughtful person I know.

Took us 10 months to conceive. You can’t control when it happens. Having a happy healthy baby should be the end goal not when the baby is born.

I do think it helps for the oldest child to be one of the oldest in their year if you are "planning" on another. The transition to school is easier, and if you are juggling more than one, any level of easy is good. After that not sure it matters, as you know what's coming...

Me and DH didn’t want a summer baby….especially my husband as he is a teacher and sees first hand how some summer children can struggle.

As it turns out, nobody can plan pregnancy and after 11 months of trying to conceive it finally happened in December, resulting in an August baby.

When I told my husband that I was pregnant he was overjoyed….but when his initial excitement wore off he said, “That means we’ve got a summer baby doesn’t it?” 😂

We always knew we would defer the year our child started school and we started him in reception at just turned 5 years old instead of when he had just turned 4 years old.

Christmas baby is potentially the one to avoid, not summer!

My little one was born mid July, just turning 3 and I absolutely love his birthday. I had severe PND and I genuinely think the brighter/sunnier days helped more than if it was a cold winter (which generally makes me feel worse mentally anyway!). We've also been able to have garden parties 3 years in a row for his birthday too and we're saving money on childcare costs as he starts school just after his 4th birthday.

When he starts school we'll do birthday parties the weekend before his birthday so it's still in term time, less risk of everyone being on holiday in the 6 week summer.

It’s funny isn’t it - I would have loved for my children to have summer birthdays - there are so many more ways to celebrate when you’re more likely to have nice weather, etc.

My DCs are all winter babies - they dislike having birthdays so close to Christmas as they have to wait an entire 11/12 months for celebrations rather than having them scattered through the year.

I don’t think there’s any ideal - and from experience, you really can’t control these things too much - so I think you just have to make the most of things when / if they happen 🤷🏼‍♀️

No, it took me ages both times. You can't control it like that.

I would always try my hardest not to have kids born around Christmas as that feels very unfair on them as they might as well not get birthdays as everyone would be too busy or just do a joint present for both birthday and Christmas. Summer, I'm less worried about.