What would you tell your 40 year old self?

[loyganroyal]

Approaching 40 and keen to hear from women and mums in their 50s and beyond, how can these next 10 years be great and full of joy, no regrets!

Exercise - start yoga - flexibility is a great help as you get older
But also take time just to 'be' - rest and relax
Go to the GP/physio at the first sign of any aches/pains - prioritise your health
Make monthly moodboards - this really helped me to carve out time for hobbies
Travel
Take lots of photos - with you in them!
Surround yourself with women - ones who inspire you in your career; ones who can share about peri-menopause; ones who campaign in their communities
Give back - volunteer
Don't spend too much time on social media or confuse it with RL

I'm would say to myself and you, it might be a bit up and down but for me it has been a fantastic decade! At 48 i have a job I love and that I feel confident at doing, dc are older so have more time for me and I have a small number but strong friendship group. I would agree, I should have lost weight so take that as a to do if you need to!!

As well as your teeth, look after your feet. See a podiatrist now as any problems with your feet now will throw your gait off and damage your joints.

Also - if you have any unironed out wrinkles in your mental health or things that worry you from the past get some talking therapy. If you don't deal with these things now they will go with you to your grave or one day will blow up. Burst that bubble and move on without it.

Totally agree that the confidence and peace that comes with age is utterly wonderfully fabulous. The friendship of other women my age who are in the same position and have shared life's ups and downs and come blazing through it is one of the best things that's ever happened to me.

At 52 I have no issues with joint pain.

Same here and I'm 63! Could be the luck of the draw.

Don't get fat.

Prioritise your health - lose weight if you need to and maintain your exercise programme .

Take care of your teeth.

If you are a bit of a helicopter parent - relax a bit and help your children to develop some independence .

There may come a time in a few years when things will get harder for you as you juggle working , children, elderly relatives needing more care - all while going through the menopause . BUT you will get through it and when you come out the other side and life will become so much easier again and you will get back time for yourself to pursue your own interests and relax .

I may have misunderstood the OP - this was general advice not specifically relating to myself - not the late ring but anyway .

Always always warm up before exercise, specifically tennis. Might not have a buggered hip otherwise

FFS not the PARENTING BIT

Go back to college and qualify for a better job.

Don't end up making yourself ill running around trying to meet everybody else's needs and not having any joy or relaxation in your life, it's not selfish to put yourself first.

Pay as much as you can into a pension or other retirement provision, you might want to retire before you think you're going to want to.

Go to the GP as soon as you have any irregular bleeding, don't believe it's just the perimenopause.

Not particularly cheery, it's not turned out very well for me since the end of my 40s despite getting the basics right around exercise, eating healthily and not drinking alcohol.

Fab thread...I'm late 30's and actually looking forward to the next decade now

Stop drinking and exercise.

Everyone I know who had joint pain in their 40s and 50s managed to vastly improve it or get it gone altogether by exercising, building strength, losing weight, eating well and cutting out/down on alcohol. It's not inevitable purely because of aging.

I've never had it in the first place, so possibly I'm really lucky. I have always been very active, though.

Work. Work. Exercise too.

Leave anyone who is violent, unfaithful or verbally abusive.

Get fit & do some form of weight training (weights, yoga, Pilates etc)
reduce alcohol intake
keep an eye on your weight- it can change without warning.
SPF
go travelling
take a look at your career & invest in training
update your wardrobe/hairstyle

Dreading turning 40. 30's still sounds young. Once you say you are in your forties, you are no longer a young woman and you start to become invisible.

Listen to your inner voice
Look after important friendships
Look after yourself too
Don't save things for best
Love hard
Be gentle with small creatures
Try to save a little

You get less visible to men. It's true. I prefer that.
If you find you're less visible generally, just work on your assertiveness.

Invisibility is a super power

Any work advice?

Had heaps of sexism / female discrim

Kept going as wanting to try & hit £500k in pension by age of 50.

Any advice people older would give , is it worth the stress and aggro. Thanks

Stop wearing leggings !

The opposite of @ConsuelaHammock - wear whatever you like!