Has anyone else had any stupid injuries lately?

[InjuryTime]

I tried to squash a small tin of Heinz beans to put it in the recycling and my thumb split open. I didn't even cut it on the lid, it just burst open from the pressure. It took over an hour and a half before it stopped bleeding. Now it's bloody painful.

I'm thinking of suing Heinz for trauma,(Not really)

Has anyone else done anything similarly foolish?

I went up to bed one night and discovered a big spider on the ceiling and decided to whack it with the fly swat, climbed onto my husband's bedside table to reach it, fell off and landed on my nose and knee, boy did it hurt!!

At home, either my desk is too low, or possibly my chair is too high, but the only way I can get my legs under is to slouch almost horizontal, and type at arm's length. This does make it easy to open the drawer to get stuff out. It sort of rests on my tummy while I rummage for a biro, or paperclip, or tube of Smarties or whatever.

The other day, still in my pyjamas, I was opened the drawer to find a cotton bud and when I closed it, rather abruptly and with some force, my scrotum got caught between the sliding drawer and the bit where it meets the rest of the desk. I mean, quite a lot of scrotum actually. SLAM. Nasty.

However, it could just have easily have been a testicle. So I count this a lucky escape.

I work in a school and sprained my elbow trying to hole punch 10 pieces of card! Was off for a week as couldn't drive 🙄

Last week I got in the car, pulled the seat belt round me and tore a muscle on my rib cage. Jesus it hurt. Couldn't move for a couple of minutes. It's on the same side as my frozen shoulder. That side is now completely fucked.

piapiapiano · Today 09:22

I was cuddling my dog and she head butted my eyebrow.

Ooh, that looks nasty. So many treacherous dogs on this thread, I though it was the cats who were trying to murder us?

I had a huge one when I was 19, maybe 20. I was following my girlfriend up the stairs and she was spooked by a moth, span round and clunked me with a novel - end on. It didn't really hurt much, but after a few minutes, it was completely closed and went purple.

When it was swollen, some of her friends came round and asked what had happened; she said, "He'll not be burning the fucking dinner again!"

They took a bit of convincing as to what really happened.

Tripped up a kerb on Pompeii. International humiliation 😳

Reached into the oven at work to adjust a baking sheet. Burnt the top of my wrist on the tray above, flinched downwards, burnt the bottom on the tray I was adjusting. Suppose it was a good demonstration of why we're told to wear oven gloves all the time though!

Many years ago there was a knock at the door early in the morning. I leapt out of bed and grabbed my dressing gown (I sleep in the buff) off the door and headed to the stairs.

As I tried to do up the tie-belt my foot slipped off the top step and I slid right down the stairs, diagonally, on my back and landed in a heap at the bottom.

Best of all I had not managed to tie the belt, so all was on show AND the front door which was right at the bottom of the stairs had a frosted glass panel in it so the poor postie would have seen something flash (literally) in front of the door, then disappear with a thump and then I managed to open the door, all smiles, with a massive carpet burn down my right leg from thigh to ankle.

Not my finest hour!

I sincerely hope you’re ok now. 💐

I’m 65 and fell a while back with the result I’ve been scared of falling again ever since to the extent my PT always incorporates balance work into my sessions.

How’s your eyesight. I only as because my optician used to look at my hands for burn marks when I’d have my eyes tested. He’d say it was a sure sign I needed new glasses when I’d start to misjudge putting my hands in the oven.

I was trying to unscrew a bolt using pliers except I somehow managed to plier the soft bit of skin on the pad of my finger. It hurt a lot. I have a really impressive blood blister.

I ripped half my toenail off on a smooth leather sofa last night. Hurt like hell and bled everywhere, Still no idea how!

Our family are renowned for stupid accidents. Myself i fell out of bed broke big toe then 12 months later fell out again and broke finger instead.
Coming downstairs one day lost my footing slid down the stairs amassing carpet burn then hit the metal bar at the base of the stair gate resulting in my bum being black and blue

I forgot about the time when I was about 11 and out with the rest of my class down the high street on some kind of fact finding local studies expedition (number and type of local shops IIRC). I almost fell down a manhole and got a spectacular scratch from upper thigh to lower abdomen from the metal poles around it. Felt like a prize muppet but looking back it could have been dangerous. I think they fence these things off much more effectively now.