Has anyone else had any stupid injuries lately?

[InjuryTime]

I tried to squash a small tin of Heinz beans to put it in the recycling and my thumb split open. I didn't even cut it on the lid, it just burst open from the pressure. It took over an hour and a half before it stopped bleeding. Now it's bloody painful.

I'm thinking of suing Heinz for trauma,(Not really)

Has anyone else done anything similarly foolish?

Not lately, but the 2 stupid injuries I've had were. Just bought a new food mixer the type where you can disconnect part of it and use it as a handheld one and decided to try it out and bake a cake. Disconnected it and creamed the butter and sugar. Went to re attach it back to the base but before that realised I hadn't got an ingredient out of the cupboard. Held the mixer with my fingers in between the 2 mixers thinking all would be fine it was turned off. On the mixer yes but not at the mains. I think you can probably guess where this is going! Accidentally caught the button and switched it on, cue mixer blades spinning round my fingers. Luckily didn't break them but they were lovely and bruised for a good while and the mixer now knackered cos it was bent to buggery. The second one a burnt foot weeding my Grandma's garden. Couldn't see if the weed burner thing was working properly so I shoved my foot underneath it whilst pressing the button. I was wearing sandals so what possessed me to do that in the first place I'll never know. And yes it was bloody working!!

I did that. Caved and went to a&e after a week, they said no swelling or bruising, won't be broken
Went outside after the X-ray to ring my dad and they came out and told me not to move until they got me a chair. Broken ankle and foot with multiple breaks

My dad "WTF. And HOW?!"

My dads recent one was trying to stop the car door blowing open in the wind. He said he had a lump on his arm and I thought he was exaggerating
He's having an operation to reattach his bicep next month

Very outing but my dog accidentally ran into my leg at the dog park and dislocated my knee!

Still limping ten weeks later!

I was shaking my knickers off this morning by kicking out and kicked the radiator with my bare foot. Bloody painful

OH nearly fell down the stairs yesterday when the cat ambushed him and he has hurt his knee.

Yesterday morning, I was going out of the gate with the dog, an elderly Labrador, who normally has to be chivvied out. She decided to shoot past me, as I was stepping down.

I did a sort of skip, to avoid treading on her paw and nearly went over. I put my arm out and hit the wall, which was painful. I grazed my little finger from the crease between it and the ring finger, at an angle, all the way to the first knuckle.

My daughter said, "How dare you call my baby dirty names! She'll get a complex!"

A few minutes later, she said, "Why are you bleeding?" I hadn't realised that I was dripping blood along the pavement.

I'm glad it makes people laugh! It wasn't so funny at the time, mind you... <gently touches nose>

I was on antibiotics 3 weeks ago after I was bitten by what I think was a Blandford fly, and my foot swelled up from high ankle to toe.
Last week I felt a horsefly bite my other ankle, and I waved it away only for it to promptly swirl round, return and bite just below my knee. I react to horsefly bites so this week I've been swollen from knee to toe.

I don't normally get bitten at all. They choose dh over me every time, but unfortunately his wasn't there. He got bitten on his chin at the weekend and currently looks like he's been in a fight.

@Elemenohp accident report to Tesco and "damages" for the cost of replacing glasses? What if they had hit a kid or something?

Not sure which is better, but GP told me today it’s not concussion, but whiplash!

My people!😂
I did exactly this last year. Ended up at A&E with stitches, tetanus shot and fainted twice. Will NEVER do this again.
I fell off a stationary chair at work. No idea why but really embarrassing 😂
Currently sporting arm and elbow cuts after running into a door handle.🤷‍♂️
I was cleaning the loo at the weekend, lost balance and ended up on my back with legs in the air like an armadillo. Hurt my lumbar and my pride...
I'm terribly clumsy 🤷‍♂️

Burst open my eyebrow and had a nice black eye for a week after smacking it on my bedside cabinet.

Was sitting on the sofa at DDILs house when she reached up for a heavy glass decanter on the unit next to me.

The top fell off and hit me just above the eyebrow causing a huge bruise.

She wasn't pleased as I hadn't put her as payout on my insurance yet 🤣

Another time went to go out of the French doors tripped on the sill of it caught the door which swung out and I went down discoulating my shoulder and twisting my knee.

6 months later still having problems with both shoulder and knee.

@MargaretThursday we actually lived in Blandford and DH and DS regularly got bitten by The Bastard Fly as its called there. Both of them would swell up like anything. They never touched me. DH reckons I wasn't sweet enough.

OMG, the same thing happened to me a couple of years ago. I was the talk of A&E. None of the doctors or nurses could believe that a dog could do that.
Its the second time I’ve dislocated that knee, obviously have a weakness there…..

Got something out of the oven, burnt my wrist on the oven rack, recoiled and punched myself in the lip then the tray fell out and burnt my foot. I was wearing oven gloves so no idea how it all went so wrong 😑

I.once scratched my eyeball ,whilst taking a frozen pizza out of the packaging,to cook for the kids tea,a tiny piece of of frozen cheese bounced off the packaging straight into my eye 😕

I took the dog to the vet and as i was locking up the garage door hubby came out and said not to as the workman was coming round in his van. So i said you deal with him while i take the dog in. I got to the house and a big gust of wind blew the garage door and knocked hubby over. And i said "oh god, he's gone" and ran up the steps, tripped and landed flat on the patio. Me and huby were both groaning at opposite ends of the garden and daughter was standing in the middle going "which parent. Which parent!"

I was cuddling my dog and she head butted my eyebrow.

Visiting relatives as a child, I slept walked and hit my head on the sink resulting in a massive gash on my eyebrow. The hospital was miles away so they took me to the 24 hour emergency vets round the corner 😂
slipped on ice, one minute I was walking, the next I was sitting, broke my coccyx badly. Was painful for 2 years!

Not sure this counts as an injury but it was certainly self inflicted. You would think at my age vanity would be all gone but no. I saw an ad for some stuff that was supposed to reduce dark shadows under your eyes. Applied two tiny dots as instructed and woke up next morning with pink swollen lids and barely able to open my eyes. Had to wear dark glasses for a week until the swelling and redness faded. Dark shadows remain.

Caught my eyebrow right at the edge with the corner of the car door as I shut it quickly (stood in road so hurrying not to stay in road) by the time I got back to my car from the 1 shop I’d had to go in I had a lump the size of a duck egg on my face and, by the end of the day, I had a massive black eye too. Was newly in a relationship and it took a lot of explaining to persuade people that it wasn’t the result of a disagreement with DP (now DH) but a daft accident!!

I broke a dog biscuit in half and a jet-propelled crumb stuck to my cornea. I could hear the A&E staff laughing all the way down the corridor.

We have a large Cockerell called 'big boy' who is really evil and goes for you if you turn you back on him. He was approaching me in a not so friendly way (if I'm being kind I would say he's protecting his 'girls'), so I started walking backwards, yelling at him. Of course in my haste I tripped over, so I started throwing my clogs to keep him away. Of course I only had 2. Husband was watching, couldn't do anything because he was laughing so much. Only pride was hurt.

I keep threatening Big boy with coq au vin, but he's still alive, and crowing as I type....

I have two:

1. carrying beaker of boiling water across the kitchen and somehow some spilt out onto my hand. I reacted by flinging the entire beaker of boiling water upwards. It landed over my chest resulting in severe burns to my left boob which I had been using for breastfeeding until that point. Had to have daily burn dressings at minor injuries and go through the pain of engorged boob as only able to feed on one side
2. I was strimming in shorts and got stung by a nettle. As I reacted I let the strimmer get too close to my shin and strimmed the skin off it. A week of iodine dressings at minor injuries followed