DP is ill and we ALL need to know about it....

[WasIBad]

He's driving me mad! He suddenly announced this afternoon that he was feeling 'really not well'. Ok I said, go to bed. I'll look after the baby and you get some rest. Oh, I don't think I could sleep, I'll just stay on the sofa 🙄

And since then there's been a lot of huffing and puffing, little sideways glances at me to make sure I'm looking before he closes his eyes and does a little moaning sound.

Then the SNIFFING! My God, I hate it. I told him to get a tissue and he shuffled sadly to the kitchen, sighing along the way.

I've suggested at least four times that he just goes to bed, but no. He'll just stay on the sofa, annoying the fuck out of the rest of us.

Anyone else have a partner who does performance illness??

WasIBad .. a doctor 🤣🤣🤣
it’s not like you can argue with his diagnosis!

Sorry,but I am I reading this right?you didn't don a nurses outfit and check his temperature immediately?didn't lovingly place your cool hand upon his hot feverish brow?didn't ferry around bringing him cool drinks and snacks?how terrible of you😂

Ailing hamster, ha ha…
Mine somehow manages to get the medicinal booze in as well. He once went to the pub (got the bus, went into the city) while off work sick.

I’m considering purchasing a Luxury Dressing Gown Of Doom for my time of the month. after reading this thread. I’m worth it.

This made me roar laughing at gone 1.30 in a sleeping house, 😂

This morning I asked if he was well enough to go to work and he said sadly that he had no choice. I bet he's sitting and chatting and laughing with his colleagues. Then as he pulls into the driveway he'll re-arrange his face to be like someone who has the Black Death and come through the door barely able to utter a word, just croaking slightly.

I'm going to make his favourite dinner and say that he can't possibly want any, he's so ill. And then maybe leave a funeral parlour leaflet on his pillow.

Stop it, I will be in trouble soon. 😂

My DH won't take any medicine when he's 'really ill' because if it's not prescription strength, it just won't do anything for his cold deadly virus

Funny how they are slumped on the couch for domestic duties then brighten up when their favourite sport is on the tv and sit up late watching it.

They do say Doctors make the worst patients, OP Just wanted to say that your writing style has given me such a good laugh tonight. If you aren't a writer, you probably should be. Hope your DH is feeling better soon!

DH used to (v rarely) perform these antics.

he now knows you’re either well enough to Do Stuff or you’re in bed, I don’t have any tolerance for the in between stage unless you’re a child off school where it’s easier to keep an eye on them on the sofa.

You got me 😏

(sarahhaynes.me.uk)

@WasIBad how are YOU doing op? Hanging on in there? 😂

I'm fortunate enough to be fairly healthy and haven't had a day off sick in over 25 years (and only then because I smashed my arm up - football )

Unfortunately, my wife is the opposite and has had very serious health issues for over 20 years.

On the very odd occasion I do feel 'off' I then feel guilty mentioning it so I keep quiet and get on with things.

DGOD should be a banned item.

My husband goes for triple threat of shuffle, DGoD, and the fucking poorly voice.

The worst thing is refusing to take any medication, despite The Great Illness.

Me "I'll get you some painkillers"
Him "No, no, I will manage" then sigh and deep breath in manner of martyr.
And repeat

@NeverTrustAPoliceman I think the world would be a much better place if Men had periods. There would be at least one week’s paid leave every month, sanitary supplies would be free and so would chocolate and ibuprofen (or at least claimable on tax). They would also all sync together and go and lock themselves in their Warren of self-pity