I hate gnomes, what's your pet hate?

[FancyFran]

Just a thread for fun. I have been reading the funeral ones in classics and it reminded me of my late mother. We bought a beautiful cottage in a posh village and I returned home from a holiday to find gnomes in my flower beds.
I got my own back by burying her in a sparkly Bet Lynch top (I had asked her what she wanted to wear at her demise she said 'suprise me, but I'll be dead'.My mother enjoyed black humour as her best friend was a Vicar and she had been a police officer. I still hate gnomes and spotted them in our new village this week. AIBU?

Primary-aged or younger children with pierced ears, boys of any age with pierced earlobes, headbands on babies, boys dressed in grey and black (fine if you don't like your kids to be dressed as retina-searingly bright as mine, but it doesn't have to be grey and black to be muted), people who own short-nosed dog breeds (especially pugs and frenchies), people who don't neuter their pets, kids bikes with characters (bikes are for transport, not a toy).

Badly dyed "funky" purple or blue hair.

The Candy Crush sweets are clearly liquorice and I HATE luquorice. Every time I see Candy Crush it reminds me of the horrible taste of liquorice and I get irrational feelings of anger towards the game for trigfering bad memories. How very dare it?

@Crikeyalmightey i quite like patchy crazy colour. Reminds me of when the DD was younger. Currently she is supporting black hair with a silver Mallen streak.
@Innocents4321 sorry I love liquorice but the thought of it as ice cream is grim. Saw some recently, disgusting ditto cheese ice-cream.

Beef jerky? Yuck.

Haggis scotch eggs, no and no.

It needs to be Wiltshire pork or Tamworth. Salmon if you must.

So many things:
People who walk their dogs in the daytime when it's been so hot
People who can't control their dogs and when they chase other animals/catch squirrels/jump up at people say things like "He's just being friendly"
People having loud and prolonged phone calls in public places
People listening to music/watching things on their phones, on loudspeaker on public transport or in public places
Artificial grass
Artificial plants
Fake tan
Ridiculously long nails
Fake eyelashes that are really thick and look like carpet
Lip fillers that look like bee stings (especially when coupled with the above)
The kids round my way that literally stand in the garden and scream
Clowns
Regimented planting in parks and gardens
Weedkiller
Rodent traps
Grey interiors
Blingy furniture and ornaments
Faux velvet upholstery on grey and blingy furniture
Reality TV
Army helicopters (chinoiserie specifically)
Anything boaty

Oh, and men walking around town topless in the hot weather.

Soneone's trash, someone's treasure

I'm surprised nobody else is bothered by ASMR videos

A number of them had an 'artefact ' look about them.

Coriander 🤮

I don't mind gnomes

I hate entitled people
Barking dogs

I walked into a shop once and the shop assistant, a young woman said, 'Morning babe!'

I'm so old I remember the Boer war!

Babe!

^

The Boer war??? Really?!

Naff instructions on walls - Live! Laugh! Love! Eat! Enjoy! Sit up straight!

Fake grass.

Paved front gardens.

@Lilyoverthevalley YYY about the butterflies.

I must confess I always wanted to be called babe. Being nearly 6ft tall and as arsey as hell it never happened. I very rarely got whistled at too.
I haven't been hit with the ugly stick, I think it might be my 'piss off' expression.

@Silverseas1 i love coriander but the DH doesn't. I have stopped putting it on his curry to achieve marital harmony😉

It’s a mystery. Don’t you have a list?

Love the idea of chinoiserie helicopters. It's the sort of thing Elton John might own. Sometimes predictive text can be an unexpected treasure.

I was imagining tasteful Oriental helicopters…!

• Drivers who lean their bodies to 45 degrees when turning corners. You're not in the fucking Grand Prix.

• The above without indicating.

On tv dramas when two people meeting say “hey” Absolute cringe

Men (I've only ever seen men doing it) steering the car into a parking space using the palm of their hand to move the wheel. Always just one hand.

I like Hey.

Gosh. Aren’t they incredibly clever?!

People ( mainly kids ) who leave their bikes laid on the floor, right outside of a shop doorway.