Would you stick to having one child if it meant more holidays?

[doorlily]

Just that, really. Would you place value on holidays, experiences and having more funds to do fun things / drop your hours at work and achieve a better work life balance? Or do you think a sibling outweighs all of that kind of stuff. I know there’s no right or wrong answer just wondering what other people chose to value more?

I must hide this moronic, vapid, shallow OP post and thread. The only response se it deserves.

Nah
I grew up as a only child, i was so lonely it was ridiculous.
I'm in my 30s now and would still like a sibling 🤣

I get your point as when we go on holiday our DCs have great fun together, it would obviously be totally different without each other. Also just seeing my kids play together generally I cannot imagine them not having that or prioritising more money etc over that.
However at the same time I remember the most lovely holidays and days out with just my parents when I was little, it was perhaps different to what I would of done with siblings but still very precious memories. Think kids just make the best of things either way

I must hide this moronic, vapid, shallow OP post and thread. The only response se it deserves.

Dramatic much? Why is it shallow to want to give your child a certain standard of living? Fine if holiday and travel doesn't mean much to you, but for some people it is central to their lives, and they want to share that. Where do you draw the line?

No. And I don't think holidays or experiences are dependant on money - or at least not completely so. Best holiday I ever had as a child, we camped on a farm and they were getting the hay in and let us help. Now I suppose if my parents had been absolutely stony broke we wouldn't have even done that, but it was hardly expensive, as holidays go!

No way.

If its any consolation its not always sunshine and rainbows. My siblings have made my life hell through periods of it and i still have to make active efforts to keep them and their poison out of my life which can be exhausting.

Having more than one child is vanity and self absorption. We only have kids for our own desire, not for their best interests. Stick with one and ride the hell out of life

Wtf?!?!

Some kids aren't bothered about having a sibling, mine isn't

I wouldn't personally only have one child by choice (and I don't)

Holidays- having a sibling on holiday IS the fun! Who would want to just hang with their parents on their own? My kids entertain themselves all day on holiday but also more importantly actually at home too and every day life. Moving schools, fashion, share secrets, stick up for one another (or grass on the other at home lol). As soon as they were over prob over aged 4, I found they would occupy themselves. They fight, of course they do, but they wouldn't change each other for the world.

When I actually think of all the only child people I know, they aren't the most generous and generally quite self centred. Yes I know this is how they are brought up, but there is an element of getting more, no sharing or compromise than those with siblings. Lonely.

But also future- big family decisions, having siblings really help for support

Who would want to just hang with their parents on their own?

Honestly, my eldest. He would have us all to himself if he could.

No. We had a tough couple of years at one point. No holidays or extra expenses. We still managed to make life fun for dcs.
They had lots of time outside being active and indoors doing all the usual indoor stuff kids do and they had each other too.
They had zero idea that things were tough.
Now we're still careful with money and can do one holiday a year abroad and one in uk as well as a few day trips. I love travelling but I'm fine with that.

I am a parent of an only by choice. How does having more than one make a difference?

You state we all only have children to fulfill our own desires. Doesn't that apply whether that be one or ten?

There's no moral superiority in the family size you choose surely? Just preferences, choice and personal circumstances.

You state we all only have children to fulfill our own desires. Doesn't that apply whether that be one or ten?

Or none

Yes - we did. But not just because of holidays/travel; we wanted to ensure we had sufficient resources (time as well as finances) to be able to provide DD with plenty of experiences and opportunities, and to set her up for the future financially and educationally.

Having just the one has meant that, now DD is 5, we can travel extensively, send her to a range of clubs and activities and DP and I have a brilliant work-life balance because we only have one child to provide for. Our life at present feels freer, calmer and simpler than what our friends with multiple DC seem to be experiencing - we are very flexible and don’t feel pulled in too many different directions.

DD has never been remotely fussed about having a sibling, but would very much like us to get a dog (which we probably will at some point).

Oh, and I’d add that, as someone who never had a strong biological drive to have children, my main reason for having DD was that I wanted to show her the world and all the amazing things in it - a goal that’s so much easier with to achieve with just her to worry about rather than additional siblings.

Flouncy goodness.

No.

No way.

That's why I stopped at 2. Wanted a 3rd, chose not to to prioritise holidays and experiences for the two we have. Slightly different than your question of having one, I realise.

But also future- big family decisions, having siblings really help for support

Not in my case they didn't. The pair of them made things more stressful that it needed to be. I may as well have been a single child for all the help and support those 2 gave me.

Like many others it wasn’t the reason we stuck at one but it has certainly helped.

I have three siblings and my life now (including elderly terminally ill parents) is actively more difficult than it would be if I was an only child. Can’t say they enhanced my childhood either. I don’t know how common that is, but it’s definitely a risk I took into account.

That. The occupying each other bit is a big bonus to having two.