Why do so many UK women post like this?

[user1477391263]

I'm British but a permanent resident of another country, which I moved to 25 years ago before social media was really a thing; my social media has people from all over the world, but the majority are not British.

I've come to realize that Facebook groups (etc.) that have British posters, such as local FB groups from my hometown, sound really different in the way people (or women, anyway) post!

There's a certain style, and it's very noticeable. It consists of using no punctuation apart from commas, no capitals, and putting kisses (x, or xx, or even xxx..... etc.) on the end of almost every post - sometimes on the end of every sentence. I rarely see this in women of other nationalities, even those who are not native speakers of English. Not every UK woman posts like this, for sure, but a lot of them do!

When did this become a thing? The oddest thing is that most of the women I know who post like this are perfectly intelligent people! I've had to sort of consciously train myself to (when reading a UK woman's online writing) mentally separate the posting style and the woman's assumed level of intelligence/education, because I know from experience that even well-read women with a lot of education quite often post like this.

I know it doesn't really...."matter," but I'm just a bit puzzled about when and why this became such a trend and why it seems to be so UK-specific. Is it about appearing friendly?

Im not taking that out on people on anonymous forums who disagree with me or say something that I don't like

You were the one who responsed to me in the first place. You had no need to do that.
If I'd said something controversial or argumentative then I'd absolutely take it on the chin getting responses robust responses. But this has just been utter nonsense.
Don't dig at people and then complain when they respond to you.

Well that went downhill very quickly

I also have two 'native' languages, and I think it makes you a bit more aware of the importance of grammar and punctuation, even if you're not aware of it at the time!

Oh cool - can you say which or would it be outing?
Mine isn't perfect by any means of course, as we've seen by the missing comma controversy.

@GottaGirlcrush

yep. Other threads if this nature tonight too!

carpet anyone?

I think you underestimate the extent to which you are an outlier.

The only people in my class WhatsApp (my class finished secondary school in the early 80s) who post as the OP describes are people who left school early and who have retained their teenage identity of working class who - to quote a song popular of that era - "don't need no education". Hence leaving school at 16, which was not the norm in Ireland at that time. Hence also never really reading much and having no interest in any further education. They're not unintelligent - they're employed, they're homeowners in some cases - they're just people who have a culture that doesn't value literacy.

I originally posted because I thought you hadn't understood that the poster was pointing out your punctuation mistake, and that you called her rude as she said something about expats not knowing how to use commas. You then went on to post some pretty disproportionate responses back to me. It's all there in black and white. You have been defensive to the extreme to people saying nothing bad at all to you. So stop playing the victim here, because you're not.

I've come to realize that Facebook groups (etc.) that have British posters, such as local FB groups from my hometown, sound really different in the way people (or women, anyway) post!

There's a certain style, and it's very noticeable. It consists of using no punctuation apart from commas, no capitals, and putting kisses (x, or xx, or even xxx..... etc.) on the end of almost every post - sometimes on the end of every sentence

I posted a thread about this a couple of years ago. Facebook is rife with it, and people from the UK. 'X' as punctuation. Not my friends but women generally. We used to call them huns or fluffy.

I know people who do this to fit in.

I only send kisses to my DP, feels too overly familiar to send to friends never mind strangers! But I do feel like this feels very judgey. A lot of people aren't perfect typists especially when they feel like they don't need to be on a casual social media app

I only send kisses to my DP, feels too overly familiar to send to friends never mind strangers! But I do feel like this feels very judgey. A lot of people aren't perfect typists especially when they feel like they don't need to be on a casual social media app

The point is that this is an almost solely British phenomenon (my socials are pretty much half North American and half UK and I see this communication style all the time on the UK side and very minimally on the other, amongst posters of a similar social class. I don't think it's judgy so much as a social commentary. It's actually quite fascinating. If Kate Fox had written Watching the English 20 years later, I wonder if this topic would feature in some way.

Could it be that native English speakers are less concerned about demonstrating they have good written English?

I see lots of kisses being used and also the dreaded 'yano' instead of 'you know'.

Kisses are something that should be confined to greetings cards for children

I would add that I'm not talking about spelling and grammar. It's the kisses at the end of each bloody sentence. I don't believe they're literally to replace punctuation but to denote friendliness or fit in, quite possibly.

Facebook extra curricular parent groups are the worst. I'll often be in a minority of parents who don't do it along with the foreigners and men. Though occasionally men do it.

cant say ive noticed xxx 😆

I think that is one of the silliest things I have ever read. To me, it sounds like more people looking for reasons to be offended and trying to get their way by acting angry at simple punctuation. I can imagine what they would have done with a letter from home back when that's how people communicated.

This way, young people have yet another excuse to not need learning proper punctuation, just like it has with spelling and grammar. FFS! (That's an AGGRESSIVE exclamation point). 😬🤔😖😩

Weird!!! Xxx

Nah, this is 100% a UK phenomenon. I'm a native English speaker from North America and I have never encountered an American or Canadian using 'xx' in their writing.

My female English relatives love to tack an 'x' or heart emoji on the end of every text message. It always strikes me as odd and I imagine someone blowing me a kiss at the end of every sentence when speaking. It's kind of the same thing, right? It's pointless and doesn't add much of anything to the communication.

I'm in many Facebook groups and I only ever see it in UK groups. It's also much more frequently used by working class or 'underclass' women. It might sound snobbish, but it's the truth.

It's interesting that you don't see that in the US. I guess I assumed it was a fairly universal thing.

I think in most countries though upper/middle class people tend to be more reserved. I've noticed it hugely moving from a white collar to a blue collar environment. I much prefer the latter personally. I encounter a lot more bluntness and churlishness as people tend not to sugarcoat things so much but there is also much less bullshit and disingenuousness too.