Why do so many UK women post like this?

[user1477391263]

I'm British but a permanent resident of another country, which I moved to 25 years ago before social media was really a thing; my social media has people from all over the world, but the majority are not British.

I've come to realize that Facebook groups (etc.) that have British posters, such as local FB groups from my hometown, sound really different in the way people (or women, anyway) post!

There's a certain style, and it's very noticeable. It consists of using no punctuation apart from commas, no capitals, and putting kisses (x, or xx, or even xxx..... etc.) on the end of almost every post - sometimes on the end of every sentence. I rarely see this in women of other nationalities, even those who are not native speakers of English. Not every UK woman posts like this, for sure, but a lot of them do!

When did this become a thing? The oddest thing is that most of the women I know who post like this are perfectly intelligent people! I've had to sort of consciously train myself to (when reading a UK woman's online writing) mentally separate the posting style and the woman's assumed level of intelligence/education, because I know from experience that even well-read women with a lot of education quite often post like this.

I know it doesn't really...."matter," but I'm just a bit puzzled about when and why this became such a trend and why it seems to be so UK-specific. Is it about appearing friendly?

I understand OP. I have lots of old schoolmates who post like that. One woman even puts kisses at the end of every mundane status update, like she's sending a polite kiss into the void. Her posts are always a bit like this: "Just popped a wash on and walked the dog, now sat with a cuppa, living my best life xx"

I think its the messaging equivalent to smiling and apologising profusely for things we haven't done. Personally I think its one of our (British) better qualities.
I mean being polite, and aware that tone doesn't always translate and to reassure the reader that you are being nice is hardly a bad thing surely.

Perhaps. I find it unprofessional when I receive emails from possible clients with xxx. Ditto with emojis. But I will think about this next time.

MN is known to not appreciate all the ‘hubs’, x or xx etc… lots if posters are having major issues with grammar and so on.
You are probably asking the wrong demographic iyswim.

Having said that, yes the style is very different from one country to the next. (EU citizens in the U.K. here).
And imo also very different from one group to the next

Eg the style on the FB page of where I live is similar to what you describe. But I’m part of some business groups and it’s totally different.

Oh go away with yr meany judgy attitude you don't know my struggles or my education and anyway I can post however I want so there now F off before I get my brother on ya

I've seen kisses at the end of posts, I assume this is just to make it seem more friendly in the same way you would a text

I've not seen swathes of post with no punctuation

Social media is informal and colloquial. You will get all sorts of ways of writing, lots of slang or trends in the way things are phrased, it makes sense that some of these will be geographical. I don't really get whats puzzling you about that

I don't necessarily agree with you here. I'm dual nationality and my European family over use emojis. But never include xxx.

But my 60 year old Auntie writes in German. "Hello 👋, how are you? Its very hot 🔥🥵 at the moment. Sending you my love 🇬🇧"

And I am also part of the local FB group and it's emoji city. They also tend to use outdated text speak like LOL, GF, BF, BRB, IYSWIM and ROFL etc

Yes, maybe it's the written equivalent of smiling or making eye contact when speaking... I do tend to use exclamation marks at the end of sentences a bit more in the UK, so maybe I also feel the urge to sound "nice," I guess. I do, however, draw the line at putting kisses on the end of my posts!

And I am also part of the local FB group and it's emoji city. They also tend to use outdated text speak like LOL, GF, BF, BRB, IYSWIM and ROFL etc

I forgot to say that's a German local FB group...

It's not my experience but I generally try to avoid the 'hun brigade'.

I've a friend who ends all her sentences like this~
It's really annoying and I don't understand it~

It's just a way of speaking

Like for example some people are very like hun/doll/girly/darling. Some people are very friendly and informal with the way they speak, others are more formal. Some from say the west country will speak differently from say inner Birmingham.

It's not a business meeting or an interview. People just develop styles of posting. I cant say I've ever really wondered why someone speaks the way they do

OP you need to check out loveofhuns on insta x

You ok hun? I'll pm you xx😁

Maybe she's doing a hula dance or a Mexican wave after each sentence?

I know exactly what you mean.

Also calling each other 'hun' swiftly followed by a x

Makes me want to gag for some reason.

British women (and men for that matter) have no problem with punctuation; its probably just the ones you know.
The xxxx thing is cultural and copied from one friend to another. Its very mildly sickly, but nothing to get worried about.

Hun culture. I blame all those "Hun" profiles on social media.

Also ppl saying "coutla". Ffs, if you're going to create another language at least stick to it phonetically and write "coupla" instead

@Catmuffin Nope, I'm not. I'm actually not British but my husband is. Most of my friends aren't British so when I see it on here or via my well educated SILs I know what I'm talking about.

I have noticed the prevalence of putting xx on the end of correspondence - as an autistic person, I find it really difficult to respond in kind as it feels overly intimate to me.

Here's my take - xx is used to indicate informality and warmth. I've noticed that if I don't put it on the end of messages other women might assume I am cold or unfriendly.

In many other languages, there are formal and informal firms if address eg Tu and Vous in French. I often wonder if this makes communication in these languages easier - perhaps in languages with an informal mode of address, it is easier to indicate warmth?

I think this might be more prevalent among women as the tone of communication of women is more heavily policed by society. If we don't get the tone exactly right, we are accused of being a bitch or a 'Karen'. Men are not subject to this pressure and so don't feel the pressure to put XXX on the end of communications.

I actually noticed this when I returned to the U.K. from living abroad for 20 years. This was late 90’s, so before social media, but we had a message system through work and very similar to what you describe.
I had worked in a financial sector abroad where the basic entry level was an ‘A’ level in maths and English. I wrongly or rightly assumed that although in a similar job maybe the standard of English was actually lower in the U.K.

U OK OP hun? pm me xxxxx

Haha. See the overuse of exclamation marks drives me potty. I've even seen people comment on others losing a loved one with RIP!! So inappropriate. Then others just use them all over the place and sound overly dramatic or slightly hysterical 😆

Terry Pratchett once said "Multiple exclamation marks are a sure sign of a diseased mind"

Definitely a British thing to put an x at the end of a sentence in my experience x

Don’t see it with international friends x