My celebrity boss is a lunatic I'm losing the plot

[Niceseasidetown]

My boss is a celebrity in our industry. Think: 100s of 1000s of social media followers, his own podcast...and all the ego that goes with that.

He is also rude (telling people their ideas are fucking shit), a huge micromanager and a bully. Everyone at work says this, not just me. His adoring fans don't see this side of him.

When I took the job he wasn't my boss. He fired my boss publicly saying he wasn't up to the job and now I have to work much more closely with the celebrity boss. My stress and anxiety are through the roof. I am criticised for everything and publicly. Literally not one thing is right (even obvious achievements). I'm mocked and ridiculed. I'm very experienced and well paid and in my 40s. I'm good at my job.

I'm obviously looking for a new job.

Spoke to HR who just sighed and said he is like that. He owns the company.

How do I cope. I feel on the edge of a breakdown. I also have to manage a team who he undermines me in front of.

Literally every hour is miserable and terrifying.

I can't do anything legally or practically. I need emotional coping tips because I am a wreck. I worry what this is doing to my physical as well as mental health.

first thought was steven bartlett..... tell me i'm wrong 🙏

No way is it Stephen Bartlett.

I know you might think everyone is fooled but it will all come out eventually. Good luck!

The mention of podcast made me think Steven Bartlett or someone from Made in Chelsea, Jamie Laing or Spencer Matthews, or that Harvey guy.

I wouldn't be telling a narcissistic bully that you're frightened of him! He will only take extra delight in abusing you. He'd love that.

Hi, I'm so sorry. this sounds awful. I’m sure you’ll get a new job soon but until then i’d say, try to actively decide that you have zero fcks to give. You’ve already decided that you’re leaving and sometimes thats the hardest bit, so well done.
Last time i was in a job i hated, I did this and it was so incredibly liberating. I took the attitude where once it hit 5:30 I’d literally close my laptop mid sentence on an email. Because i decided i had nothing to lose i became way more confident and felt like i was actually doing a better job (but also didnt care about that - because it’s irrelevant if you have zero fcks to give).
In some ways its also been useful taking a little bit of this attitude forward to jobs i do like. so overall a weird learning experience. If you manage to get through all the replies and see this - wishing you lots of good luck for finding a new opportunity and a speedy transition.

All the best op

The old trick of picturing them on the loo. Very best of luck with the job hunt.

Daily Fail or The Sun might give you some £££ for a celeb scoop - just make sure anything you tell them IS true, but it sounds like you'll have enough material without making shit up.

OP I worked for a narcissist in a 'nice seaside town', literally. I was a very big cheese. My boss was a celebrity social media star with a multi million pound business. Think female focused goods. Her followers love her. However this person terrorised their staff, every one was fcking shit and tears were a daily occurrence. The company glassdoor reports became toxic with people doing a 'Bridget' weekly. I spent my time open mouthed and warning the owner she was heading for multiple tribunals. However the person who was far more dangerous was her sidekick Chairman. An absolute shit, Satan in a Suit, lavicious, crude, uneducated and a psychopath. He thought females over 40 shouldn't be employed. I fought back against his campaign against me. Two of my co workers left before me (both 40+) and I jumped. I took a fake redundancy. I did hire a solicitor but I hadn't been there two years. His wife (poor bint) is a solicitor and he uses her to plan is mind games. I wouldn't pss on him if he was on fire. The sad thing is if he wasn't in that company the owner wouldn't behave like she does. She has also lost business contracts because of his manner with female decision makers (think Benny Hill).
Personally I think life is too short. I would resign ASAP and keep your dignity. Nothing infuriates egotistical people than those with class and their own self respect. When anyone asks me about this company I just laugh and ask if they have read their glassdoor feedback. Good luck.

Take comfort in the fact that people are spitting in his/her soup and similar things - it's what happens to bullies.
I had a work colleague who was in a very similar position to you in his old job and told me that he and another assistant used to replace the horrible boss' expensive flown in special glacier melted water with water from the cistern from the loo ... then pop it in the fridge til it was the right temp - it had to be a certain temp for this twat...
Someone somewhere is going to give revenge in this arse of a boss of yours, not to mention they'll need something one day only to find no-one is willing to help...

Agree with @MustWeDoThis to get occupational health and GP on side. If you have worked at this company for more than 2 years then he can’t just get rid of you and your contract should also state if you are entitled to sick pay and the terms of that, otherwise you are at least entitled to statutory sick pay. Also make sure you get as much evidence as you can collated ready for an employment tribunal. If he has forced you to leave because of his horrendous behaviour the that is constructive dismissal if he sacks you before two years unfortunately nothing you can do unless there is a protective characteristic - ie disability, race, sex, creed etc discrimination involved. However if over two years employment the again you can take a tribunal. Very simple process which ACAS can assist with. Also check out their bullying and harassment policy or staff handbook to further prove they are not adhering to their own policies and again evidence where possible. Good luck.

Make notes of all the nasty things. Dates, time and comments. Go for constructive dismissal.
https://www.gov.uk/dismissal/unfair-and-constructive-dismissal#:~:text=Constructive%20dismissal%20is%20when%20you,demote%20you%20for%20no%20reason

Max Beesley?

Isn't max beesley an actor?

Think of yourself as a resistance fighter, a spy, or something that just shifts your mindset slightly.

I love this idea from a pp. Imagine that you've been planted in the organisation to make daily reports to MI5 about his awful behaviour. The more awful it is, the bigger the team of armed operatives they'll send abseiling in when you finally use the coded message (which is obviously "I'm resigning"). You might actually quite enjoy your last few weeks.

But I hope you manage to get out soon, OP. If you've got to the point of calling the Samaritans, you shouldn't rule out a period of sick leave as an emergency option, you poor thing.

SAME! I really hope it's not him! 😬

Ok I’d get signed off for stress if you can. Download the Indeed app and keep applying for jobs.

This

it works, ive used it. The fact that you care gives him power. Stop caring about how hard you try, stop caring about doing a good job. Literally stop giving a rats bottom about it all.

it hard to disengage but once you do you’ll feel so liberated

Is it Ricky Gervais?

I don’t think he has his own podcast, he had one about ten years ago

This sounds awful OP, I haven't had time to read all the replies but I agree with other people when they say emotionally detach, log the craziness of it all and use it to your advantage in the future.

Keep reminding yourself that one day hopefully not too far from now you will have moved on and you will feel so much better.

And please see your GP if it all gets too much. Could you use some leave to reduce your hours for a few weeks just so you can have some time away from work without impacting finances?

I hope it’s not but who else is a multimillionaire with a very successful podcast?? He seems so nice though 😳

NO NO NO! NEVER say anything bad about your previous employer. You can hint at it maybe, but never state anything outright. If you do say that your previous job made you ill, it can leave you open to questions about your loyalty, and whether it was the job or that you're just the kind of person who can't cope with any kind of pressure or criticism.

Even when I DID have to leave a job that was making me ill, I went out of my way at interviews to make it clear that it wasn't the fault of the job or the people, and that was why I was taking a couple of steps down the ladder (which was true in this instance)

Once you have a nice new job, while you have been secretly filming ur boss and his outrageous behaviour towards you, and other staff. Once feet under door in new job, create a fake instagram, TikTok and what ever other up your own ass social media he is on, and upload the videos and tag him and watch what happens… sometimes assholes gota fall… just make sure it is not done from your own home or ip so no come back…. Or just get on with life and be pissed at how he has treated you and take the videos to the police I’m sure what he is doing is illegal, abuse of any type in the work place is illegal you could very well take him to the cleaners with a good lawyer 😉😜personally I’d like to get my own back and humiliate him in return for all he has done. I think Iv had that kind of treatment too many times in my life and would love to see someone who thinks they are better than everyone else and think it ok to bully and humiliate people, I think they sometimes need to know how that actually feels. Maybe I’m spiteful, or just like a bit of revenge 🤷‍♀️

Ask for a meeting with him. Just you and him. Or corner him. Alone.
Tell him he's behaving like a C**t and to kindly stop or you will wage a war on outing him in Mumsnet. It will gain traction on this forum, and the optics will look very bad for him. It will make the Red Tops, and be a great story for the Mail online. Fucking bully. You've got nothing to lose. Do it.