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Original poster

What’s your gut reaction to a 38 year old being pregnant?

918 replies

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:25

Do you consider 38 old to be having a baby? Just interested in how people honestly feel hearing it as obviously most people would be polite in person but I’m not sure if secretly they’d think it was quite old to be having a baby?

probably overthinking but hey…

OP posts:
Jooliusreezer · 01/03/2023 09:53

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:33

She said it to me with a tone of almost disgust at the thought of someone my age having more children which made me feel a bit shit!

You sister is a bit of a spiteful twat then, isn’t she?

Would you tell a pregnant 38-year-old woman she was too old? Would you even think it if a friend told you they were pregnant? If not, tell her to shove her spite up her miserable arsehole.

SpinningFloppa · 01/03/2023 09:54

I’ve only ever seen this attitude on MN that 35+ is too old to have a baby.

scrivette · 01/03/2023 09:54

It wouldn't even cross my mind to consider they may be an older Mum. I had my last at 37 and would happily have one now I am in my early 40's.

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WimbyAce · 01/03/2023 09:55

Wouldn't think anything of it. I got pregnant at 39 and gave birth at 40 and didn't hear anything negative. In fact it was me that kept mentioning my age when I was in hospital! The consultant said to me as I was fit and healthy I was actually a lot more low risk than some younger mums to be.

ehb102 · 01/03/2023 09:55

I had my first at 38. I'm a great mum and was responsible, waiting until I was healthy enough to have a baby. I wasn't even the oldest first time mum in our year group. Lots my age, a few older.

Times have changed. Women have always had babies into their forties. The "change of life" baby was common 100+ years ago, when you thought you were past child bearing age but you weren't after all.

Your friend is being very unreasonable. She needs wider sources of input for her world view.

Waitingforchid · 01/03/2023 09:55

In my area mid to late 30s and early 40s is standard ..

Mumof1andacat · 01/03/2023 09:57

I have friends who had babies at this age and that's when starting a family suited them so good on them. I had my one and only at 28 and didn't not want anymore. I'm 38 now and could not imagine having another baby now but I'm tired and done with the baby stage.

GiraffeLaSophie · 01/03/2023 09:57

If they were already pregnant then I wouldn’t bat an eyelid. It’s a very common sort of age to be having a baby around here. However, if they were planning on TTC at 38 (especially for a first baby) then I would privately worry they’d left it quite late and it might be difficult for them.

That was a really unpleasant thing for your sister to say. Just ignore her!

AngelsWithSilverWings · 01/03/2023 09:57

Quite normal in my social circle. My sister was 43 with her first. I was 38 when my DD was born. Most of the "mum" friends I've made from DD's year group at school have been a similar age to me. Some a year or two younger and some a year or two older. My DD's best friend's mum is 60 with a 14 year old and a 12 year old. It's the much younger mums that stand out to be honest!

FfeminyddCymraeg · 01/03/2023 09:57

Wouldn’t give it much thought beyond being pleased it wasn’t me 😅

Favouritefruits · 01/03/2023 09:58

38 seems within the normal range, I honestly wouldn’t bat an eyelid.

WiltingLobelia · 01/03/2023 09:59

That is when I was pg. No-one ever suggested it might be odd or unsual. Least of all HCP.

It's also the age quite alot of the parents in my DCs class would have been as well. Plus older than that with subsequent pregnancies.

turnthebiglightoff · 01/03/2023 10:00

@HVPRN thanks so much :-) 20 week scan on Fri - don't feel completely out of the woods yet but that's probably normal.

Thewolvesarerunningagain · 01/03/2023 10:00

It's a normal age to have children. I had mine at 37 and 40 and shared a ward with women mostly around my age.

Claysta · 01/03/2023 10:01

No judgement, I would be pleased for them - I had DS at 39 (was pregnant at 38), and DD at 41.

Tessisme · 01/03/2023 10:02

My gut reaction would be 'Congratulations!' I had my two at 41 and 45. All good!

MrsSkylerWhite · 01/03/2023 10:03

Congratulations.

pantherrose · 01/03/2023 10:04

I was 38 when my long awaited only child was born. I had a very easy pregnancy and whilst I was careful, remained very active and surprisingly fit throughout, more so than much younger women in my ante natal class according to the midwife!
Ignore negative comments, someone will always pop up to rain on your parade with their 'words of wisdom' x

fairtrauchled · 01/03/2023 10:05

maddy68 · 01/03/2023 09:28

Why would anyone think anything other than congratulations?

This

quietnightmare · 01/03/2023 10:07

58 as a woman I'd raise an eyebrow
48 as a woman I'd think wow you are brave but good for you
38 as a woman I think normal

Springintoactions · 01/03/2023 10:08

Tiring

LoopDiL00p · 01/03/2023 10:08

I had mine at 37 and 39 and my friend's are similar or even older. I would think nothing apart from congratulations.

@Pegfriedrice Does your sister have children? If so, how old was she when she had hers? Not saying it's okay, but people often tend to judge anything that's different to what they themselves have experienced.

Moxysright · 01/03/2023 10:09

Not too old at all. My gut feeling would be to say congratulations!

TinyTear · 01/03/2023 10:09

@Pegfriedrice I was 38 when i had my first and 41 when i had the second...

if any thought came to me would probably be they had fertility/miscarriage issues and it was great she was finally pregnant

GMITUSDEURO · 01/03/2023 10:10

It's a normal age to have a baby! I had my third at 38.