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Original poster

What’s your gut reaction to a 38 year old being pregnant?

918 replies

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:25

Do you consider 38 old to be having a baby? Just interested in how people honestly feel hearing it as obviously most people would be polite in person but I’m not sure if secretly they’d think it was quite old to be having a baby?

probably overthinking but hey…

OP posts:
SusiePevensie · 01/03/2023 09:42

Assuming she wanted to be pregnant - congratulations!

Sparklingbrook · 01/03/2023 09:43

turnthebiglightoff · 01/03/2023 09:41

I'm 18 weeks with number 2 at 38 (after some losses). A friend of mine said "god there's no way I'd have another at my age, I was done by 30!!"

I replied "if we had all settled for our first boyfriend more of us might be done by 30"!!

Fight the spite with spite. She's not mentioned it again.

How thoughtless to say that. Some people have no filter. ☹️
i agree that a lot of people haven’t even met the partner they actually want to start a family with at 30.

Bigmummaof2 · 01/03/2023 09:43

I think it’s wonderful! My auntie was 41 when she had her 4th! No issues. Anyone who thinks otherwise is the problem!

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HVPRN · 01/03/2023 09:43

turnthebiglightoff · 01/03/2023 09:41

I'm 18 weeks with number 2 at 38 (after some losses). A friend of mine said "god there's no way I'd have another at my age, I was done by 30!!"

I replied "if we had all settled for our first boyfriend more of us might be done by 30"!!

Fight the spite with spite. She's not mentioned it again.

Congratulations! My 3m old came after 3 losses :) 💛

Honoraryuce · 01/03/2023 09:44

I wouldn't think it was particularly old to have a baby.

BooCrew · 01/03/2023 09:44

Also, bear in mind pre-contraception, many women just kept having babies until the menopause - and while their bodies might have been more exhausted and less likely to carry to term after so many pregnancies, there were certainly still babies born to women in their late 30s and early 40s. My nan had my dad in her 20s and my uncle in her late 30s, and that was in the 1950s!

HVPRN · 01/03/2023 09:44

@7Worfs haha love it! Grin

CouldIHaveThatInEnglishPlease · 01/03/2023 09:44

Honestly? It depends if it’s your first/second/third etc baby. Since most woman start their families in their 30s, having a second or third at 38 is normal. However if it was a first baby, and you planned another 2 or so, yeah I would probably feel a bit sorry for you because it means you will be having them in your 40s and infertility might make it harder, then the thought of possibly raising toddlers whilst managing menopause, and teenagers whilst planning retirement etc.
but this is just how I feel and a baby is always a blessing imo so you would just get my congratulations.

btw, I’m 38 and my dc range from 19-7years old, so I’m at the stage of starting to watch them spread their wings and gain independence so going back to the beginning fills me with dread

SignOnTheWindow · 01/03/2023 09:45

Wouldn't think twice about it. My mum was 38 when she had me (her first) back in the 1970s. Was unusual for a first baby then, but not now.

Congratulations! 🎊

incitethismeetingtorebellion · 01/03/2023 09:45

I wouldn't think anything of it but I had my 2 at 41 and 42.

WandaWonder · 01/03/2023 09:45

In the 1923 it may have been odd, in 2023 nothing whatsoever

SirVixofVixHall · 01/03/2023 09:46

Normal, surely ? I had both my babies in my forties, as did quite a few people I know.
38 is a pretty common age to have a baby.

hryllilegur · 01/03/2023 09:46

Loads of people have babies in their late 30s. even more so if it’s not their first baby. In some areas you’d be the young parents in the playground if you had your children in your 20s and early 30s.

One of the things to remember about becoming a parent is that some people
are judgemental arseholes about literally anything. Ignoring them and just getting in with making the choices that work for you is the only sensible course of action.

mindutopia · 01/03/2023 09:47

Nothing really, I had my youngest when I was 37.5 so I'd just think it's normal really.

FrenchandSaunders · 01/03/2023 09:49

Normal, wouldn't enter my head to think it was old to be honest.

WeAreTheHeroes · 01/03/2023 09:49

I think other women are often the harshest judges of fellow women, particularly in relation to a woman's age and pregnancy. It's time it stopped.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Helbelle75 · 01/03/2023 09:50

Really pleased for them, wouldn't think of age at all. I had my dds at 41 and 44 and no one was anything but pleased for us.

Emptycrackedcup · 01/03/2023 09:50

I was 39 and pregnant, and on reflection that was probably too old for many reasons. But if you want to be financially secure, have an established career and finished with partying and travelling and ready to settle down then this is about the age

IceReckon · 01/03/2023 09:50

It's on the older side to be having a first baby but not surprisingly old.

BelindaBears · 01/03/2023 09:50

Would be perfectly normal in my circle, so I’d think congratulations!

areweonabreak · 01/03/2023 09:51

Wow I had my twins at 38 - I know it’s at the upper end of the scale but honestly I wouldn’t expect anyone to be shocked 😳

euff · 01/03/2023 09:51

My first thought would simply be congratulations if it was wanted. Lots of people are having children at this age these days and are absolutely fine. Then thinking about it I know that I personally wouldn't want to because of various family history concerns that others wouldn't have. I don't know what's in store but would want to minimise risk.

Abeachsomewhere · 01/03/2023 09:51

I wouldn’t think anything, either for a first baby but particularly for a second or third baby. I had my DC when I was 35 (after fertility issues) and a miscarriage when I was 39, so if I hadn’t miscarried I would have been 40 when I actually gave birth. I’m 42 now and would be delighted if I was pregnant again, although it’s very unlikely to happen because of my past history. I no longer care what other people think, you have to do what is right for you. No one else has a right to judge when they don’t know your circumstances.

Seasonofthewitch83 · 01/03/2023 09:52

Think it depends on your social/family group to be honest.

I was pregnant at 37, as were my friends. My first had thee children in quick succession age 42. It doesnt seem old to us, because we do not see ourselves as 'old.'

Its perhaps different if your circle all had children in early 20s and now have teenagers.

Seasonofthewitch83 · 01/03/2023 09:53

Seasonofthewitch83 · 01/03/2023 09:52

Think it depends on your social/family group to be honest.

I was pregnant at 37, as were my friends. My first had thee children in quick succession age 42. It doesnt seem old to us, because we do not see ourselves as 'old.'

Its perhaps different if your circle all had children in early 20s and now have teenagers.

spell check ' my FRIEND had three children age 42.