Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

What’s your gut reaction to a 38 year old being pregnant?

918 replies

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:25

Do you consider 38 old to be having a baby? Just interested in how people honestly feel hearing it as obviously most people would be polite in person but I’m not sure if secretly they’d think it was quite old to be having a baby?

probably overthinking but hey…

OP posts:
CrotchetyQuaver · 01/03/2023 09:33

Normal these days. I wouldn't think anything.

EmmaEmerald · 01/03/2023 09:33

Totally normal.

Holly60 · 01/03/2023 09:34

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:33

She said it to me with a tone of almost disgust at the thought of someone my age having more children which made me feel a bit shit!

She is being purposefully unkind. Is there any reason she might be jealous of you?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

SavBlancTonight · 01/03/2023 09:34

So odd to even think about this. 38 is well within perfectly normal range for having a baby. It's not 1912. As a slightly older mum myself, it's true that a lot of DD's friends' parents are younger than me so I do notice that sometimes as they're celebrating their 40th birthdays and I'm starting to think ahead to 50, but certainly, when pregnant, it isn't even a thing.

My sister had her first at 37 and they made a song and dance about a geriatric pregnancy. But even just a few years later when she had her second, it was mentioned once in passing but the language had completely changed and there was much less of the indrawn breaths, concerned looks and overall references to her age.

7Worfs · 01/03/2023 09:34

HVPRN · 01/03/2023 09:32

Haha yes! I'm 37 and currently nap trapped under my 3 month old ;) Brew

Snap, I’m 39 and currently nap-trapped under 6mo ☕️

Spideysoap · 01/03/2023 09:34

Literally no reaction. It feels like a very normal age to have a baby. And it’s probably on the young side here! In my nct there were two of us in our 30s. Everyone else was 40!

BCBird · 01/03/2023 09:34

It's what you think not the others.

TempsPerdu · 01/03/2023 09:34

Wouldn’t bat an eyelid. DD was born when I was 37 (DP 44), and lots of our circle had their second DC at around 40/41.

We’re in a part of London where this is pretty much the norm now. And we’re nowhere near the oldest parents in the class now DD has started Reception. So I’d just say ‘Congratulations!’.

HVPRN · 01/03/2023 09:34

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:33

She said it to me with a tone of almost disgust at the thought of someone my age having more children which made me feel a bit shit!

What a shame your sister made you feel like that. Wonder if there is something going on with her?

My sister recently let me know she is pregnant and is due in August. She is 39y right now :) very happy for her 🎀

MaryJean87 · 01/03/2023 09:35

I wouldn't really think anything other than glad it's not me.

ComtesseDeSpair · 01/03/2023 09:35

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:31

my sister made a comment to me that I was getting ‘too old’ to give my child a sibling and that surely I was ‘done’ - I’m 36 and would likely be 38 if I were to have another. I just wondered if what she said was what most people actually thought - ie it’s old to have a baby, as I don’t think like that but realise I might be in the minority.

Well, if I were 36 and knew I wanted a baby, I wouldn’t deliberately put it off until I was 38 without really pressing reasons because fertility declines sharply in your late thirties. Perhaps that’s what your sister meant by “too old”?

3peassuit · 01/03/2023 09:35

Mid 30s plus seems the normal age to start a family around my way. No one would raise an eyebrow at a pregnant 38 year old.

itssquidstella · 01/03/2023 09:36

Totally normal, but I had my first this year at 37 and lots of my friends are having babies! I hope to have a second by the time I’m 40.

ILiveAt64ZooLane · 01/03/2023 09:36

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:31

my sister made a comment to me that I was getting ‘too old’ to give my child a sibling and that surely I was ‘done’ - I’m 36 and would likely be 38 if I were to have another. I just wondered if what she said was what most people actually thought - ie it’s old to have a baby, as I don’t think like that but realise I might be in the minority.

It’s a good job it’s not your sister’s decision then. Is she always so opinionated regarding your life choices?

skippy67 · 01/03/2023 09:37

MaryJean87 · 01/03/2023 09:35

I wouldn't really think anything other than glad it's not me.

Yep, me too.

kirinm · 01/03/2023 09:37

That it's totally normal?

Sparklingbrook · 01/03/2023 09:37

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:31

my sister made a comment to me that I was getting ‘too old’ to give my child a sibling and that surely I was ‘done’ - I’m 36 and would likely be 38 if I were to have another. I just wondered if what she said was what most people actually thought - ie it’s old to have a baby, as I don’t think like that but realise I might be in the minority.

She’s really horrible to say that. Nobody thinks that, 38 is not too old and perfectly normal. Flowers

SemperIdem · 01/03/2023 09:38

I don’t think it’s unusual either now, or historically.

YukoandHiro · 01/03/2023 09:38

Not at all! I had my second at 38 but I know lots of women TTC at 40. But I live in London and lots of women have had long careers first or haven't found anyone to settle with so are going it alone

TimeForMeToF1y · 01/03/2023 09:38

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:31

my sister made a comment to me that I was getting ‘too old’ to give my child a sibling and that surely I was ‘done’ - I’m 36 and would likely be 38 if I were to have another. I just wondered if what she said was what most people actually thought - ie it’s old to have a baby, as I don’t think like that but realise I might be in the minority.

What kind of people do you come across that you think 38 is thought to be too old to have a baby?

Its totally normal, why would anyone think anything?

ErrolTheDragon · 01/03/2023 09:40

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:33

She said it to me with a tone of almost disgust at the thought of someone my age having more children which made me feel a bit shit!

It's not you, it's her.
I was 38 when I had DD. My dm was 37 for me (last of 3); DHs was 42. Having babies at this age isn't a new or rare phenomenon.

turnthebiglightoff · 01/03/2023 09:41

I'm 18 weeks with number 2 at 38 (after some losses). A friend of mine said "god there's no way I'd have another at my age, I was done by 30!!"

I replied "if we had all settled for our first boyfriend more of us might be done by 30"!!

Fight the spite with spite. She's not mentioned it again.

BooCrew · 01/03/2023 09:41

Completely normal. I had my first at 37 and all my friends had babies around the same time. My NCT group ranged from 32 to 40.

FuckWasps · 01/03/2023 09:42

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:33

She said it to me with a tone of almost disgust at the thought of someone my age having more children which made me feel a bit shit!

Then she's a very strange individual. It's a perfectly normal age to have a child.

JenniferBarkley · 01/03/2023 09:42

I had my DC at 34 and 36, so if I'd wanted three I would've likely been 38. Thoroughly unremarkable in my world, I can think of several friends who were 38 or older, and loads who were just under that.