What’s your gut reaction to a 38 year old being pregnant?

[Pegfriedrice]

Do you consider 38 old to be having a baby? Just interested in how people honestly feel hearing it as obviously most people would be polite in person but I’m not sure if secretly they’d think it was quite old to be having a baby?

probably overthinking but hey…

Having had my children aged 36, 39 and 42 I consider it completely normal. The best bit was that all the other mums at school pick up were all 5-10 years younger than me and assumed I was the same age.

In the old days, before contraception, it was very common for women to have babies right into their 40s. It's not too old for a second child at all.

I think it's a normal age these days. I was 36 with my first and 39 with my second and wasn't the oldest in either of them.

I’m shuddering just thinking about it! However, that’s only because I had DS when I was 19 so for me it would mean going right back to the beginning which I would hate. For a first child it would be all new and exciting so why not?

Had my first at 38 and second at 41.

I had mine at 28, 34, 36, 38, and 41. Currently thinking I might possibly be pregnant….. baby is but five months old.
as per @Toomuchtrouble4me I have had those who think my eldest DD must have a different Dad - nope - she just turned out to be autistic which we didn’t realise struggling through her early years….
you can’t win. I was a baby faced younger adult, and I used to get judgement with DD1 at age 28 cos many thought I was a young mum (why people prejudge that I also fail to understand), and now I am “geriatric”, and because we have a large family also, people seem mystified we want more, and judgemental that I am “carrying on when I’m so old”.

point is, screw em! It’s all so silly. Everyone should grow up about it, or mind their own business. I have posted previously that my own sisters had their babies all much younger, one has judged me a little and the other always thrilled for me - but in the end it hasn’t mattered a lot in the relationship. If your sister has a problem - it’s to do with her, not you. if you are lucky enough to be able to do it, siblings rock. Even the hard things are good - your kids learn and love so much through having siblings, and your own heart swells more with each.

physically I felt no more tired at all pregnant with five than I did with one. And I was running around after four other kids.

Come to West London, that’s normal for a second baby - and for many the first.

I was always amazed at how young pregnant women were outside the M25. Barely born themselves, it seemed.

I'm still trying to get pregnant with my first at 37 and I could care less what anybody thinks as its none of their business. I used to get comments in my late 20s about the fact we didn't have any kids. We were /still are struggling to get pregnant. I cut people like that off as people are too judgemental and should focus on their own lives. Whatever age a woman chooses to start her family is nothing to do with them. I'd never judge any woman for having a kid later in life. Such a nasty disgusting thing to do as you don't know why they have waited so long. Like myself , they could have struggled/ might not have met someone who provided them and a possible child with stability or they might not have been ready financially. There's so many reasons and we should never judge anyone for anything. We should be kind and support each other regardless of our decisions.

I'd consider it normal. In my friendship group, the average first time mum is 32/33. Most will continue having babies into their 40s if their life plans work out.

It feels physically harder being a bit older, but it's totally worth it. Had my 1sr at 17- complete walk in the park physically 2nd pregnancy at 30/31 was quite a bit harder but then if I didn't have anything to compare it to I wouldn't have known that.

If OP was dreading going back to the beginning then I dont think she would be considering a sibling.

But you raise an interesting view point. So you had your child when you were really young - Id imagine you were 'independently' insecure financially, you'd have been watching your friends going out and enjoying their freedom, and then watching them able to focus their freedom on building careers, buying the lastest gadgets/makeup/clothes or whatever. That must of been tough. Understandably you had the love of your child that cannot be replaced by anything materialistic, but still that must of been really really difficult being cut off from socialising, money and freedom at such a young age. Whereas at 38 life is so different - you have your own home, career, money, and friendship groups generally also have children so widens the social circle. Weekends become trips to the zoo.

I guess what Im trying to say is your experience of starting over again could be because you may have struggled. Whereas when I had my little boy at 41 I was financially independant and found that an enriching experience.

But ultimately your view goes to show there are pros and cons to both sides

I would say that it’s wonderful news and enjoy every minute, just like I did. We decided to build our careers, see the world and have our children later when I could give up work for a few years to be at home in their most important years. Best decision ever. Why would you not be happy for anyone who is having the baby they want, whatever their age!

What? you said women and then said barely born. That makes no sense. Unless you were trying to be a twat

I had my last child at 39, so wouldn't think snything of it.

I wouldn't think anything other than congrats. I had my DS at 36 and my DD at 42 and am still considering another child as I have embryos left (from IVF with 2nd child). Am 43 now, DD is 10 mths.

Who cares what she thinks?

Oh I'm so glad to read this. I might be pushing 44/45 with DC #3 after having my 2nd at 42! I just had my baby 10mths ago at 42. Was the babe at 44 much harder than the previous pregnancy?

Oh I'm so glad to read this. I might be pushing 44/45 with DC #3 after having my 2nd at 42! I just had my baby 10mths ago at 42. Was the babe at 44 much harder than the previous pregnancy?

Oh I'm so glad to read this. I might be pushing 44/45 with DC #3 after having my 2nd at 42! I just had my baby 10mths ago at 42. Was the babe at 44 much harder than the previous pregnancy?

Sorry about my screw up postings, I did intend my question for @Tessisme

Haven't used MN much! .... :(

I had my son just before for 38th birthday. I wasn’t ready before that & just had not met the right man. I am so pleased I waited as it was the right thing for me. I feel it should be about what is right for you, and not what others feel is right or wrong. After all it is just opinions and only you can truly know how you feel about it.

What does that even mean?

It means that it is quite common for women in London to be older when they have babies (late 30s-40s), whereas outside of London it is more common for women to be younger (early-mid 20s).

From the perspective of a 39-year-old mother-to-be in London, 21 seems very young, barely the age of an adult. Whereas, of course, for many other people 21 is perfectly old enough to start a family (and they would be incredulous as to why anyone would want a baby past the age of 30, let alone 35).

Different people have very different perspectives.

It's not a London thing, though, it's a social class, education and prosperity thing. More educated, higher-earning women are more likely to have children later, if they have them. Depending on which north London GP surgery I saw my midwife at (she worked out of two, geographically close, but very different in terms of populations, wealth etc), I was either pretty much average at 39, or the best part of twenty years older than the other expectant mothers.

Isn't that the norm these days? Age is just a number - health is a bigger issue. Many 38-year-olds are healthier than 28-year-olds.

Their eggs won’t be.

@HelloBunny people are really insensitive, I guess we all say things without thinking but MC is really devastating. I experienced it too, and like you my little one was a lovely surprise.

I know exactly what they were implying. It was the patronising 'barely born themselves ' comment. It added nothing