Cooking is a bone of contention- help me learn?!

[Cantcookhavetocook]

Ever since we got together my husband has cooked all of the evening meals. I hate cooking and genuinely believe I am crap at it, have no repertoire of things to cook and seem to make a mess of it even when following recipes. I also get stupidly stressed by the mess and never being able to get timings to work. Whenever I have cooked for other people I have felt mortified as it has seemed obvious to me that they haven’t enjoyed it. I know it’s all about practice but I have admittedly always taken the easy way out and never got off my arse to sort it. Not proud of this but can’t change it now! When I was young and single I got by using jars and very simple (often processed) stuff, but now we have a toddler I don’t want to rely on rubbish convenience food. Husband seems an effortless cook, just whips tasty things up from scratch without recipes, but I know that at some point he too had to learn, and this is no excuse for me not to pull my weight!

The reason I’m having this epiphany is that we are now at a point where I am on maternity leave and he works full time, mostly from home but with a few long days out a month, is about to take on a new role with more responsibility, and he still cooks tea every night. I am ashamed to say he even rushes home when not working from home to make sure he’s able to cook. No point in flaming me, I know this is shocking!

So long story short, can you help me scrape together a repertoire of simple but healthy meals with everyday ingredients? I have an almost 3-year-old and an 11 week old baby, so I need to be able to easily get the ingredients and cook while managing them aswell. I know I could Google recipes for spag bol and stuff, but they always seem complicated with red wine etc. I just want family friendly recipes that taste pretty good but aren’t too taxing on either the shopping or the cooking front. I suppose budget friendly would be a bonus too!

I will massively appreciate any help you can give
me to become a domestic goddess!!! Thanks in hope!

What will your almost 3 year old eat? What do you want them to eat?

Jamie Oliver ministry of food book

The BBC good food website is good, tonnes of simple recipes.

Not cheap but Gusto or Hello Fresh might be a way to get going

I would also recommend Jamie Oliver’s ministry of food -‘making t helps with the basics. BBC good food website is great too.

“I am ashamed to say he even rushes home when not working from home to make sure he’s able to cook. No point in flaming me, I know this is shocking!”

Man works AND lifts a finger at home shouldn’t be a shock to anybody. But yes, probably time you learned to cook. Why not ask him to show you? Or follow Mary Berry or Nigella recipes - they are simple and always work.

I would say start with mushroom omelette (if you can cook that, any combo of veg will work), a basic chilli/curry and roast a chicken.

Look at traybake and one pot recipes, that way timing is much easier as you only have one thing to manage!

I made this recently which was easy

https://www.sainsburysmagazine.co.uk/recipes/mains/creamy-mustard-chicken-and-leeks

Cottage pie is a pretty forgiving one
Or a pasta bake

Making this soon, but using shop bought pesto and adding chopped peppers, cherry tomatoes and whatever other veg I have!
https://www.mob.co.uk/recipes/pesto-pasta-bake

@AutumnCrow she is a pretty good eater (most of the time) so will eat most curry/ chilli/ cottage pie/ pasta type things and then will have a go with meat/fish with potatoes/rice and veg type things? Thing is I just don’t have go-to meals I can roll up my sleeves and cook at the drop of a hat without finding a recipe, buying all the ingredients from the list, and following it line by line

@Rebellious23 I have recently got this, looks a bit scary! Any particular recipes you would recommend starting with?

Get a couple of weeks of HelloFresh and Gousto boxes, then you can focus on the cooking without worrying about sourcing the ingredients and you can build a repertoire of some favourites. The Roasting Tin cookbook by Rukmini Iyer is brilliant too.

Why not ask him to show you?
@UWhatNow he has done but it has never stuck. He just chucks stuff in and doesn’t always do the same every time. I could get him to try and write down what he does but am trying to give him less work to do

Ooh good idea, bit more focus for the Google search!

Amazing I will have a go at these, thanks!

@runo103 @BonnetDeDoucheRodney this would be a good starting point too, wouldn’t be able to afford to do it regularly but maybe as a one-off just to get my eye in!

My pal gave me a code for Hello Fresh so I got a few meals discounted. I probably couldn't afford to do it every week but my children made one of the meal the other day. Everything comes pre measured so it takes away a lot of faff and the recipe cards are really easy to follow and you obviously keep them so you can make the recipe again. Ask around for a code.

The ministry of food book (Jamie Oliver) is a great starting point. I also recommend watching the hairy biker old programmes, unlike trained chefs they are down to earth and self taught, love their recipes

Tbh, the best & fastest way to learn to cook well is with a teacher.

Your DH is an excellent cook- he can teach you.

I would start sous cheffing for him and he can show you how to cook one family favourite at a time. Sous cheffing means do the veg peeling, chopping, and then as you get better doing small sides or sauces on your own.

Gradually, you do more, until he sous chefs for you and sort of hovers to give advice. Then you’re ready to cook solo.

It will take a bit longer as you have two DC to wrangle, but that just means he will have to show you each meal a few times instead of once or twice.

Have a notebook as well to jot down his tips. He will have them.

Don't learn. I thought about it long ago but realised that I would then be doing EVERYTHING

Ah the Nigel Slater style of cooking.

Ministry of food as someone has said is designed for new cooks.

A roast is easy it's just about timing. And you can roast sprouts too.

This!
Jamie’s recipes are really clear to follow. He writes in very simple language.

This is my pretty easy Bolognese
Buy ready cut sofrito/also sometimes called chefs base

• put a little oil in large pan, heat
• add bag of sofrito, stir fry
• chop up four slices of bacon with scissors, add to pan and continue to cook
• add 500g mince. Cook until brown, stirring/separating up with the wooden spoon
• add one or two cans chopped tomatoes, cup or two of water, one beef stock cube and 3 bay leaves.
• Simmer on low for 40 mins, stirring occasionally. Add a bit more water if it gets dry.
• serve with pasta, rice, jacket potatoes or even in wraps

I make double and freeze left overs in portions / eat some the next day.

More work in the short term will mean a lot less in the long term.

You're going to grow old together so he might as well start teaching you now.

The Roasting Tin cookbook by Rukmini Iyer is brilliant too

Seconded. All 1-pot meals, so easy timing. And they're set up so that once you learn the basic principle of a recipe you can make it with lots of different combinations of ingredients (it has simple instructions for doing this for each group of recipes- choose a carb from a list, 3 vegetables from the next list, then a protein, then a sauce etc).

In time you will build a repertoire of easy go to recipes but that will only come after learning to cook either through following recipes yourself or someone showing you how to cook.

I agree with starting with simple one pot or slow cook recipes. Hello Fresh/Gousto are also good options and are usually heavily discounted in the first few weeks to entice you in.