"Checking in" with the kids before I go to sleep.

[gemloving]

I don't even know if this is unusual but I just went upstairs to get ready for bed but I check on the kids every time before I go to sleep. It's become such an embedded routine that I find it hard to settle if I didn't or if I forgot, I'd lie there, get up and check on them, then I can go to sleep peacefully as if I know everything is ok.

My eldest gets a couple of kisses and I tell him I love him, youngest gets a stroke over his head and me telling him I love him (he's still in a cot, otherwise he'd get a kiss too). They're 4 & 1 (almost 2).

Do other parents do this or is this just me?

If I'm staying over at my mum's for any reason and I go to bed first, she'll still crack the door a wee touch before she goes to bed 'just to check' and I'm 43! 😄

I think its one thing going in if the door is open, light is on and the person is awake, my teens do this to me all the time (they've been going to bed later than me for years but I read) and we chat a lot then. But going in when they are asleep or knocking/going in when the door is closed over the age of say 10 seems a bit of an invasion of privacy to me, I'm glad my parents don't do this.

Mine are 22 and 19 and eldest lives away. But always did when they were called. I just looked in as didn’t want to risk waking them. Normal I think.

Called? Children

Mine for some reason gets really emotional now when she hears In The Night Garden or sees Makka Pakka she says it's happy tears!

No. I have a camera and I'd be too afraid to wake them up. Plus they sleep in the dark so I wouldn't be able to see much anyway and would be fumbling around!

That's so sad

When my DS was small I did this to check if he was breathing and comfortable. As he got older it was just to check. If he's with me I still check he's ok even though I'm in bed before him.

My DF used to do this when I stayed with him even when I became a mother.

I just love him so!

Awww this is such a lovely thread. Too much sadness in the world for parents to hear at the moment. This "checking in" feels a bit more important somehow

It does tug at your heart slightly doesn't it?

Only very recently stopped doing this, as my light-sleeper 12yo started shutting her bedroom doors and by going in I would wake her up. Still doing this with my 9yo, though.

Yep, I do this every night or else I would go to bed feeling very agitated. My children are 7, 8 and 11 and I always go in before I go to bed myself, check they are breathing, tell them I love them.

@HerbalTeaAndCake well, it seemed that a lot of people enjoyed sharing their stories on here despite my bizarre question. No negativity needed.

I do, I have to touch them too to check they are still breathing- luckily they are very deep sleepers! I go into their rooms to say goodnight if they are ever sleeping away. It's a ritual.

Oh yes. Mine is almost 8 and I peek around his door every time I go to bed.

Always. Can't sleep without checking them.

They get a kiss, a little sniff of my youngest who still has that distinctive sleeping smell that my eldest has now lost, find and tuck in the much loved teddy bear that always falls out of bed, tuck in blankets.

Probably a highlight of my day

I still do this and mine are 19 and 16. Well not so much with the 19 year old as I'm usually in bed before him and even if I'm not I can rarely open the door properly for all the shite behind it. It's just a routine I've had since they were born.

Yes, I often work late shifts and I'll always nip in and give the kids a kiss when I'm back. If I go to bed and I haven't I have to get up again.

I do this with my 8 year old ds.

I did this with my DC when they were younger.
No video monitors around back then.Even if there was I think I'd still quietly check on them before I went to bed.

Oh wow I sing the ceebeebies song to my 12yo DS sometimes - he loves it 🤣

I don't touch them or get too close, in case I wake them, but I always check on my nearly-13yo and 10yo before I go to bed. I want to make sure they're ok, that their beds aren't full of books/sweets and just to look at their little faces when they're sleeping and angelic!

God no, I wouldn't risk waking them up! If I thought I heard something or they were coughing I might peek through the door, but I wouldn't go up and touch them unless their blanket had fallen off or something.

Yes always have done like you I can't go to sleep unless I've gone in to check on them to make sure they are ok.
And mine are almost 6 & 4 so I guess it won't ever stop me checking in on them.

Mine are little and I pop my head in now but I wouldn't when they are teenagers. I'd have hated my parents coming into my room when I was asleep (or trying to sleep). It would have felt an invasion of my privacy.