How do you train yourself to truly not care what others think of you?

[LoveMAFS]

I want to be able to do this, truly not care what others think of me. I've had two subtle comments said to me recently:

'You a single mother n all'...
'You must rattle around in that house'

I was shocked at the single mother comment. Despite being separated, my ex is excellent with the dc, fully involved and never stints on child expenses. It felt like they were infering my dc don't have a dad, but they do. I was also shocked to hear the 2nd comment, that someone would have an opinion on me living in my house. (they live in an identical one, just with their whole family).

I want to totally change how this affects me because I hate feeling judged and I guess people are never going to stop judging. How do you do it?

If you were truly happy with yourself and your situation then these comments would be water off a duck's back.

So the secret is that you have to focus on yourself, and learn to love yourself.

Other people's comments will only bother you if you think there is some truth in them.

I

I reached the grand old age of 48, in full peri menopause and find I give absolutely zero fucks what anyone outside my family think of me any longer. Comments like this? I’d just laugh at them now. So liberating.

You get yourself the menopause. And you give zero fucks what anyone thinks of you. It's fantastic (once you have suffered the shitty symptoms for 5 years in my case!).

I think we always care what others think of us to some extent and anyone who says they don't is lying, basically. Or a psyhcopath!

But it becomes less of a preoccupation as you get older - one of the benefits as you age.

You choose your response (emotional, verbal etc) to other people's stupidity and ignorance. No one is better than you so just rise above it.

This !

I love getting a sly dig off someone. Shows I have wound them up without even trying.

I answer back or challenge as often as possible, firmly but politely.

I used to really be sensitive about people being nice to me and liking me and would try hard, too hard. I am nearly 60 and just all of a sudden around 10 years ago, I realised I actually didn't give a shit on peoples opinions about me. I valued those I love and my very dear friends, but no one elses opinion bothers me. I am still nice to everyone I meet, but it's because that's how I am and not to create a wonderful impression.
Hopefully you won't have to wait as long as I did.