Advice / reassurance needed please !!
I managed whole of January Dry, and bonus of last night too! Actually do feel great, although I have pined big time for a real gin, or glass fizz or rose.
But I'm out this evening with a friend who has literally been putting-off meeting up until I could drink again. She's booked a table at snazzy bar, and wanting a fun night.
The thing is, I don't know what I want. I feel nervous about having a drink, which is the most bizarre feeling! It's almost as if I've told myself alcohol is bad, makes me feel rubbish, full of sugar (which I have eliminated completely from diet) - that despite really wanting a drink, I don't know if I do.
Sorry if talking jibberish, but can anyone relate? Advice? Do I have just one? Do I share a bottle and let my hair down? I feel very up-tight, and would LOVE the release that alcohol brings. But genuinely don't know what to do. I'm feeling really under pressure .... pressure to drink? pressure from myself ???? It's almost as though I'm having to seek permission. Arrrrrraaaaggggghhhhh! I'm a grown middle age woman, very capable of making big decisions!
(In all honesty I think I would rather be meeting to catch up for a morning coffee or bite of lunch when it wouldn't be an issue, but won't happen logistically with work. Plus she loves a night out!)
What do I do? Anyone understand and doesn't think I've gone crackers?!