Well just as there are “perfect” babies who eat and sleep well, and amenable toddlers who don’t have tantrums, there are teens who don’t find the transition from childhood to adulthood particularly taxing. But there are also babies who never sleep, toddlers who tantrum for Britain, and teens for whom adolescence is full of emotional highs and lows. It’s hardly surprising that all teens are different is it?
However op, I do think that, whereas it is socially acceptable to have a bit of a moan about the challenges of caring for babies and infants, parents are far more reluctant to be open about parenting teens:
(1) because they are protecting the privacy and confidence of their older child, particularly if teens and parents circulate in vaguely the same social circle,
(2) parents feel that if teens are going off the rails then they are more culpable because they have been parenting a teen for longer than a baby or toddler, so they feel guilty,
(3) rebelling teens are usually questioning or challenging many things their parents stand for, which can feel like a huge rejection to a parent who is trying their best, so it’s painful to talk about
(4) there is a ridiculous middle class competitiveness among many parents about where their teen is attending university or what long haul volunteering opportunities or intern placements have been secured for them, so parents are wary of speaking up when their teen is taking a “different path”.
In other words op, you are not alone, many (but not all) parents do encounter difficulties with their teens but quite a few choose not to talk about it.
Btw, imho your friend is neither tactful
or a good listener!