I've not even been engaged 48 hours........

[Pojji]

And people are already creating drama.

Sat and had a cry earlier because I was so happy the dp finally proposed. Now it's become a political minefield keeping everyone happy. One person getting annoyed at another for buying me a planning book. Another getting annoyed that I'm going to try on dresses with a friend......it was more to give me a kick up the ass to lose a significant amount of weight (which is long overdue)
I have no intention of buying a dress, nor do I have the funds to do so!

I just don't want the whole planning process to be people bickering. I'm not interested.
I said to dp that if this continues then we will take the kids and elope. I hate arguing.

I love my family very much. I want them at my wedding but actually what I really want is to just marry the man I love. That's all thst matters. I'd love a pretty dress because I never look pretty. I'd love a big party. But none of that actually matters.

I know thst there's going to be arguments over the bridesmaid choices, the dresses, the hen do 😫

I wish we hadn't told anyone our news and kept it to myself. It's completely burst my bubble.

Elope, elope, elope.... wow.

What if the OP doesn't WANT to elope? What if she wants her day and party????

We had a registry office wedding, arrived in jeans and a 'nice top', whitenesses were 2 ladies from the office, we had a haggis chippy for our wedding breakfast, cocktails in the pub and fell asleep in the park.

We still haven't told told anyone and will be celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary this year

Get married abroad, no one there as your wedding will be a disaster. Then have a big party with no one able to fight over roles and responsibilities when you get home

Ours was full of bickering and it ruined it for me. I actually say ‘I wish I never got married’ all the time to my husband 😂 despite the fact I love him. I did stop speaking to some family afterwards because of their behaviour though

Congratulations OP! I sympathise on family stress OP- I chose a very low key wedding, just local register and our two living parents as witnesses. It was STILL stressful!!!!!…. Because everyone had to put their opinions in about everything! I was told I’d regret doing it so low key (after over 20 years together), people who get married after so long end up divorcing (cheers for that one SIL and MIL), thanks a lot for not allowing us to share your day, selfish decision apparently.
It’s disgusting how some people behave. If you can afford to save and go away, this is what I’d do. Get the legal side done while away and feel free to “please” others by having a little gathering afterwards for people to see you in the wedding gear and wish you well. We had a buffet, a photo booth and a DJ. Job done for less than £3000 (but we stayed local).

Oh and don’t worry about your weight making you not look beautiful on your day. Everyone looks beautiful on your day.
I lost so much weight before my wedding that the dress had to be altered last second, oooooops.

Congratulations on your engagement, got married for 2nd time 2021, So wish I had lost weight before getting married looking at pics now , as for dress, charity shops have some amazing ones some bigger branches have their own bridal suites got mine for 50 , just have your children as bridesmsids/page boys save arguments there, found registrar and venue (still a town hall) was costliest thing , but depends where you are , I'm in South, Hope u have an amazing day marrying the man of your dreams.

As for that Delorestormborn so rude no need for it. Theres always one 🙄😡

@Pojji
I’m so sorry your family are being like this!
the thing that jumps out at me though is you saying that you never feel pretty. I’m sure you are, but the main thing is you need to feel it, every day! Not just your wedding day! My advice would be, work on your confidence and self image. I don’t know you, but I’m sure you are a gorgeous worthy person and you need to feel it!
spare yourself the wedding drama and sneak off somewhere to get married. People will get over it and you can have a big party to celebrate after. Weddings are seldom as wonderful as we build them up to be and honestly, it your family is already being difficult 48hrs in, it’s only going to get worse.
Big hugs beautiful lady 💜

Congratulations on your engagement op 🎉🥂🌹

I'm another one for going for an elopement! DH and I booked a weeks holiday in a nice hotel in the Highlands and got married while we were there, Honeymoon included as well!! We pulled two strangers off the street (who had themselves eloped 30+ years before) and did the necessary - went back to the hotel, complimentary bottle of champagne and phoned our parents to break the news. Our only guest was the dog!

We did have a wedding blessing and party about 10 months later, but by this time the dust had settled, so we invited who we wanted to and no one was upset. Local village hall and a friend did the catering. Biggest expense was a fantastic band for the evening.

20 plus years later we have no regrets and we'd do it all over again if we had too!

Go for the wedding YOU want - it's all about you and your other half - no one has the right to dictate how you do it. And if they won't stop, run away!!

Good luck and again, huge congratulations on your fabulous engagement 🥂

Congratulations. May your life be full of love and happiness.
I agree with Broken Wing. Have a lovely wedding.

I'd go abroad and send everyone and invite with them travel agents details to book on

If they come they do
If they don't they don't

End of

Congratulations

I’m quite old and never married just “ common law”. Back then those that did just seemed to organise wedding, after party and honeymoon ( generally straight from the do). Men had stag party maybe just down the pub and that was it. I think the hens do is good to balance stag but can’t believe the arrangements around it that I see on here, including going away somewhere! Staying in hotels spa stuff that’s just hens! Isn’t it all too much? I don’t get the pleasure of all this stressful stuff not to mention money . So IMO you should reel it in. Of course have a night out in a nice frock but just arrange as a host of a party. No chief hens organising it etc 🙄

@mustgetoffmn You know there is no such thing as a common law marriage and you have no spousal rights?

I used the term loosely instead of saying “ I wasn’t married but I was with someone for blah years and had a child blah” yes thanks I learnt the difference about 45 years ago.

And totally irrelevant to the point I was making