DH has been fired and I need talking down

[Zorrita]

DH was pulled into a meeting this afternoon to say they were letting him go. He had a few issues with his direct boss (this is a separate issue and we will be going to ACAS), been in the job less than a year and it was decided he didn't gel with the team. Nothing bad that affects his employability or that will prevent him getting another job pretty quickly.

What I do need are practical tips on what we can do now while he looks for employment. What can I do in the immediate aftermath of this to soften the blow? A few things for context:

• We have about 4-5k coming to us but that will take a month or so I believe, and have minimal savings (about 2k)
• DS (1 year old) is literally starting nursery next week. We've paid the first month but not sure how we could afford to keep him in until DH is employed again
• We have put a Universal Credit application in as our income has now more than halved
• Applied for council tax reduction but not sure we will qualify
• DH is not shy about what he does - he is happy to go back to stacking shelves while he looks for something else
• I am in secure employment with a big company

Is there anything else I need to do practically that will help our situation? If it comes to it I believe my Dad will be able to support us for a couple of months but as I am sure many will understand it's embarrassing having to ask and I would much rather do everything else I can first before I borrow from him.

Please be gentle. I am feeling rather fragile right now and I don't need anyone adding to this already awful feeling.

So if the OP’s wage alone won’t support her family and her husband can’t get another job, surely she’s exactly who UC is for?

i just don’t think it should be the first option, sure If he still is out of work in a month.

Been in a similar situation. Warehousing night shift sounds like a good shout for DH short term whilst he sorts a new job.
Are the company not offering any payment at all? They should at least pay his notice ((1-3 mths, check his contact). Would buy you

I culled all our household spending - Netflix, Spotify, gym membership, no takeaways, shopped in Aldi instead of Sainsbury's and picked up fruit and veg from the market. Cooked a lot with the slow cooker and mainly veg/pulses rather than meat.

It isn't the first option, have you read the list of things they've already done? But given how long applications take to go through it is logical to get the application in now. It would only be approved if they are eligible, in which case by definition they need it. And when their income goes back up it will automatically decrease.

This is the very definition of what the benefits system was set up for. Where possible, temporary support including for those who have paid in over the years.

Job market is booming if he’s not fussy he will get a job ASAP. Don’t think he will have issues finding work ..don’t think you have a problem to be honest.

Secure a decent reference

So many good suggestions.

You addressed so much already before you even wrote this post OP, with such recent news.

What also stood out for me is that you said your DH is not shy about what he does. Such a good attitude and it will stand you in good stead!

Of course she should be proud, very proud indeed to have gotten off her arse and done whatever needs doing!!!
Shocking comment by you and shows how entitled some people are.

We need to do whatever we can, while we can, and however long we can to get by. These industrious people are the very essence of our society. Thank you.

All the benefit pearl clutchers should rest easy. If the OP is eligible for UC, she’ll get it. If she’s not, she won’t.

Fortunately, our benefits system isn’t based around the sanctimonious feelings of mumsnetters.

@Zorrita this link may come in useful www.gov.uk/working-tax-credit

despite some saying it’s no longer available. The govt uk website appears to say otherwise.

Sorry I haven't read the full thread.

If you have a mortgage you can ask your lender for a mortgage holiday for a few months which may help.

There are loads of jobs in the hospitality sector still.

OP, ignore all the arguing about UC. Either you will be legally entitled to something or you won't , it's not paid out based on others opinions, it's based on a formula of your income.

You could look at "entitled to" to see if you think you might qualify for some help.

There is not a 6£ grand limit that you can have. Once you have 6 grand they start deducting money off your uc. For 6.5 grand it's about 30£ deducted which if you are getting a chunk of UC it's not too much of a worry!

'But surely benefits aren't there to keep the middle classes in the standard to which they have become accustomed?'

How much do you think UC is

If you work for a large company, check your employee benefits, some large companies offer ‘hardship loans’ through payroll where you get some of your salary up front and then pay it back via payroll over the year

It really depends on what he does, surely? If professional services of some kind, the time for taking DC out of nursery and looking for delivery jobs is surely premature?

Is he working any kind of notice? If he is, he will be paid for Jan including holiday owed, which would see you through Feb as usual. If he’s put on gardening leave, he’ll be paid for that too. Or they could just pay him off with a discretionary lump sum in lieu of working his notice. Either way, he’ll have a salary payment that will see you through for a few weeks.

Depending on what he does, he should be applying for roles in his field first and foremost, not looking for other roles in other industries as a stop gap. I’m making a lot of assumptions about what he does but if it’s any kind of “white collar” work, the time to panic is not now. Now is the time for calm action.

I’m our family’s breadwinner. I was made redundant early into the first lockdown and as I had been there under two years, had no redundancy. I woke up in this night in an absolute panic, updated my CV and LinkedIn and applied to about 20 roles in my industry. I didn’t want to make any rash decisions about childcare in case I got another job straight away and then was left without childcare. In any event, within 3 weeks I had a new role and didn’t actually miss a pay day. I was very lucky so it is sector dependent. I’ve also had to let four people go last year due to lack of performance and they all had less than two years service, so we offered them a pay out and put them on gardening leave so it didn’t look like they had gaps in their employment.

Good luck OP - once the shock wears off, you’ll be able to see clearly what DH needs to do.

@askmenow No. A society which pushes its people to the brink of survival is not one to be proud of. Working 3 jobs to just about keep your head above water is a governmental failure. You are a tory's wet dream.

This is shame for you but you know plenty of us mumsnetters are single parent who live on a single income. You are 2 adults with 1 child, I am 1 adult with 2 teens. WE survive on my 21k wage., with diffculty.
When the food runs low just, well, don't eat and borrow food from colleagues lunch vouchers at work. Its easy when you know how. count yourself lucky to have another adult, adulting, and able to get a paid job tomorrow, ( indeed is your friend) and spare athought for us middle class yummy mummies who live on 1 wage alone, and top up from UC.

OK but its not a race to the bottom. There are people who live on less than you but it doesn't mean you aren't allowed to complain. "OK but I have it worse" is not what anyone needs to hear

Hi, sorry to hear this OP. My DH was made redundant just before Xmas as the company he worked for went insolvent. We weren't sure if he was going to get his Dec salary so I was in a blind panic for a couple of days but that was paid thankfully. Like your DH he is entitled to statutory redundancy but won't get that for another 4-6 weeks. Our immediate situation has been resolved now as someone we know has taken him on on a contract basis until he finds a new role so we hopefully have an income for the next 2-3 months. I also work in a fairly equivalent job so it's a case (or was) of our income halving overnight.
The things I looked into:

• the mortgage is our biggest outgoing so I called the bank. They weren't as helpful as I'd hoped but as we have overpaid in the past they allowed me a 3 month repayment holiday. Worth calling them.
• I pay quite a lot into my pension which I can adjust monthly so my plan was to reduce that temporarily.
• Review childcare - my kids do after school club which I planned to cancel.
• Aside from that I don't have much wiggle room on monthly bills aside from drastically cutting back day to day spending.
• job seekers allowance - everyone is entitled and it's about £75 a week.

Hope this helps

Sorry to hear that this has happened. It also happened to my DH twice in 18 months so I understand how you might be feeling. in spite of this, he has never been unpaid for more than 2 consecutive weeks.

He contacted a number of recruitment agents who specialised in his field of work. Not just generic temp recruiters but those who knew his CV and skills and knew employers who would fit. He had multiple interviews lined up within weeks and a number of offers to choose between.

He may have been lucky, but I think his approach to using specialist recruiters worked well. He also applied outside of his usual field and got interviews there too.

So my advice would be contact recruitment agents who focus on your DH’s field of experience. In parallel, do generic applications to supermarkets/bar work/delivery driving etc. Anything to keep money coming in.

Another thing I have done is work compressed hours so I get same pay for 4 days meaning we save a day of nursery costs.

in the past when he’s been between pay days for a month I have been known to take out a zero interest credit card for all expenditure to then pay off gradually once his salary started coming in (always before 0% ran out).

I know this won’t help you now, but my DH has a rocky history with employment, so we now have a very small savings account which holds enough to tide us over for 4-6wks in case we need it. It took a long time for us to build this up but it gives me a great sense of comfort to know it’s there. I know not everyone can do this but if you can squirrel a little away every month it will
help.

Good luck

Do lunch vouchers still exist??

I'd agree about a heavy focus on getting a job in his field, but maybe do some pub shifts in the meantime? At the moment I've not known anyone not be able to get some pub work.

@Tinner01 you know it takes 5/6 weeks for the first UC payment to even come through? It’s not a short process and if OPs DH gets a job she can just cancel the claim, it’s better to apply as soon as you are able to.

Well it's interesting that people's first thought when they lose a job is too apply for benefits.

It's all very well saying people survive on less income which indeed they do, but if it's expected to be temporary then suddenly not being able to pay rent/mortgage or any other financial commitments is different from being on a regular lower income where those commitments are budgeted based on less coming in. You are unlikely to want or be able to cut back those commitments/move to a cheaper property or area when it might just be for a few months.

My take from the OP is that she is trying to see if there is anything else they can do for the the short term. I don't get the impression that they are workshy scroungers.