A thread for those on their own

[Purplepuddle]

Hi Everyone 👋

I thought it'd be nice to have a thread for company for those, like me, on their own over Christmas.

A place with no patronising comments telling us to go for a nice bath or volunteer at a local soup kitchen, no-one saying they'd love some peace over Christmas (not quite the same when you're alone all year round).

Apologies if there are loads of these threads already, I've used Sarah Millicans twitter hashtag before and thought it was great to chat with some like minded people.

For me, I've had a nice December, enjoyed the Christmas markets, ice skating and a few meals out. No stress for tomorrow, no running around buying hundreds of pounds of food nobody Eil eat. I'm also lucky enough to have had a few invites tomorrow which does reduce the loneliness (I'm not going but it makes me feel a lot better knowing I've been thought of).

So hello to anyone on their own, whether you're struggling or quite happy it'd be lovely to hear from you xxx

(P.s as ppl seem to take offence to everything, I'm aware there will be those not alone but having a shit time. Not saying us loners have it worst)

I like your ps @Purplepuddle - seems like everything has to be caveated now so well done on getting there first! Happy Christmas OP

How lovely of your neighbours @pantherrose x

Year 6 of solo. I am now coming down with this horrible cold that’s doing the rounds and so relieved I’m not hosting anyone tomorrow. Tomorrow will be spent wrapped up on the couch with a hot water bottle and not a care in the world. I’m blessed, and don’t take it for granted either.

@bloodywhitecat My DS has the same disabilities and he is 24, now. I feel lonely is that the same

I’m very happily not alone this year but for several years after my first marriage ended, I dreaded Christmas and the whole run up to it. I used to tell people I didn’t ‘do’ Christmas so they didn’t feel sorry for me — but in reality, I was always so pleased when Christmas Day actually arrived because then suddenly the tv was full of Boxing Day sale ads, which I could cope with. I’m sure there are lots of single people who love Christmas (and I think that’s brilliant), but I didn’t have family either, so it was literally just me.

@Purplepuddle - Yes it really was so lovely of them and their kindness this evening has meant so much to me x

@Garysmum - Your post hit such a nerve, I could have written it myself. I've always tried to get a grip and avoid crying wherever possible but recently just a simple text notification from DS has had me blubbering before I've even read it! I need to call him, but I'm not sure I can trust myself not to burst into tears and I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable or to worry him so I've stuck to messaging. The neighbours kindness touched me so much that I couldn't help but tear up and I'm beginning to think that I should warn people not to be nice to me right now

Thanks for this thread OP. This is such a hard time of year for those of us who are on our own, I think it really brings it home. I had to switch Radio 2 off this afternoon as it was lots of pp saying how much they were looking forward to spending time with their big, loving families. Am still making myself a lovely Xmas dinner for myself, cos I bloody love it, drink some wine and console myself by reading all the threads of pp having their family dramas!

Big hugs to you all, remember it's just one bloody day!

Hello, on my own here too. I have turned down a few invitations, don’t want to be a spare part at someone else’s Christmas. Getting over Covid too so don’t feel like doing much. Third crap Christmas in a row for various reasons. Not really bothering with anything although I do have a nice meal planned.

For films I have watched Knives Out (Channel 4) and Saving Mr Banks (BBC) in the last couple of days and can recommend both as light entertainment (although Mr Banks has sad bits, don’t watch if you are feeling really down/lost your DF recently).

Mostly I'm ignoring the fact it's Christmas altogether and happily eating whatever I want and pottering around the house doing stuff that needs doing, having a nice break from work and taking some time for myself

I recommend it except perhaps not stripping sealant at 11pm at night...

Happy Christmas to all of you hugs handhold as needed. Do whatever you need to get through today. ❤️❤️❤️

Hallo from Australia! I'm currently sitting in the garden drinking Jack Daniel's and alternating between Mumsnet and reading Chalet School books. I'm petsitting so always knew I'd be on my own today; plus my friends and family are back in the UK. I'm feeling a bit lonely, but as last winter/Xmas was hideous (I have depression and severe SAD), it's better for me to be here. I hope everyone gets through the day okay.

I was just about to start this thread, you beat me to it.

I don't actually celebrate it so I'm quite happy, but I know not everyone is.

That sounds really sweet.

I can understand he is hard work but if he loves the tree why not keep it up?

Just popping in today will be hard for me too..Currently sat awake remembering xmas past .My parents died when I was 17 and will see my brother out of duty. My day will be spent looking after me and watching TV and wine and a evening walk around the neighbourhood looking at lights then call the midwife.
Hope everyone finds there peace.

I am sorely tempted to do just that!

Well , this is what happens when you go to bed stupidly early ! It's 06:30 and I'm wide awake .
Happy Christmas to you all , I hope you have a peaceful day xx

I'm trying to decide what to have for dinner people. IN the freezer I have a steak, salmon and some lamb chops.

I have more veg than a veg shop (ordered an odd box, forgot about it and Sainsbury's were doing 19p veg).

Should I defrost some meat / fish or should I go vegi for the day.

I'm debating about making a soup and some bread. I could also get a take away, a couple of pizza and a couple of Indian places are open later.

The veg I have includes

sprouts, cabbage red and savoy, parsnips, sweet potatoes, tomatoes and kale.

I would have steak , roasted sweet potatoes with some of the other veg. Then if you make bread have a nice sandwich later.

Thank you, I think I'll get the steak out now.

OK the freezer is packed and I found some belly pork, I think I might be having a an Asian broth with pork and veg.

This is my first Christmas by myself and I'm really enjoying it. Had a nice breakfast, now lying in bed with the cat on my feet.

Later I'll have a bath, use some pampering things from my xmas advent calendar. Have a walk, cook partridge for my xmas dinner, and watch Netflix.

I'm enjoying the space and peace to do nothing, speak to no-one, have no demands on me, and think about what I want from next year.

I've been on my own for the past 4 days, and will continue to be alone until my EXDP drops our 2 young DC back here at lunchtime.

It's actually my first ever Christmas morning alone, I split with my EXDP 18 months ago, and last year DC and I stayed over at my parents.

The house is decorated with a tree etc and the DC's presents are waiting under it for them, and when they're done we'll go to my parents for a late lunch, so I don't even have to cook.

I really don't feel that Christmassy. My EXDP never used to buy me thoughtful presents (usually last minute Christmas Eve sale rack type things) or treat me in a special way, so I wonder if I associate Christmas with feeling unappreciated and sadness. In previous years I was too rushed off my feet cooking and making sure everyone else was ok, to stop and think about it.

I hope everyone here has a lovely Christmas Day, whatever you choose to do! 🎄🎄🎄

I am not totally alone all day as my DD and SIL who live close-by will pop in for lunch (bringing most of the turkey lunch with them which is good even though I usually enjoy cooking) but it isn't going to be a great day. A few years ago my long-term partner died at Christmas and this year my exDH (and DCs father) who I am still very fond of, is in hospital and may not come out again even if he makes it through Christmas. It is going to be a very low key Christmas and I doubt my DD will stay long. I don't mind being alone, but I can't help longing for the happy Christmases of mine or my DCs childhood. Hoping one day for GCs to make Christmas special again.

My abusive ex used to ruin every Christmas and I'm sure that's why I now don't like it. It's very hard to disassociate those feelings.

Good morning everyone !!!

Merry Christmas 🎅

I've just made myself a mini fry up for breakfast, in between the chocolate mince pies made yesterday.

Been reflecting on past Christmasses from the utter excitement as a child to the many spent at work and the few spent in tears. Christmas Day is a huge reminder of what I don't have, no partner, no children...if I stop to think about it the tears will come, big ugly tears. I'm not sure why my life has turned out as it has but I've generally accepted it now.

To the pp deciding on dinner later, I'd go for salmon and all my fave bits whether they matched or not.

Merry Christmas everyone  Ive just had salmon with poached eggs and contemplating opening the Baileys.

@Purplepuddle I have also been reflecting this morning, trying not to as it never leads to anything good. I have a few new books to read to keep myself occupied