Entitled CFs at Christmas - stories please!

[BarbaraVineFan]

I always love the CF threads on MN and thought I'd start one with a Christmas twist..not much to add myself but csn offer the story of my uncle, who never used to lift a finger at Christmas (Or any time) and expected all the women of the house to scurry round fetching him drinks and snacks, then would complain about whatever he was given, 'these mince pies have way too.much pastry' or similar. Even as a child I remember getting frustrated on my aunt's behalf!

Anyone got any stories to share?

STBXH (left 7 weeks ago, OW in the wings)texts to ask if it’s ok if his nieces can stay over at my house. His house is… empty and depressing… so I don’t mind. I want kids to have a good time with my kids. They are with us for Xmas and visiting from overseas. They are coming for an Xmas eve meal so will be nice for my kids to have thier cousins around. Then casually drops in that he and his brother are planning to leave me with 5 kids after food and fuck off to the pub after supper. I am just forcing a smile and trying not to go nuclear . “I am sorry but that is not going to work for me. You total thoughtless wanker.” 🍷

I hope that you have told him that the pub trip is not happening. No smile, forced or otherwise, required.

Back later to read more!

I see you've met my brother!!!

He just popped over and whilst here said 'I assume you don't want me to bring anything for tomorrow, or you would have said." - this is actually music to my ears. The first time ever there has been an acknowledgment he isn't bringing anything. This feels like progress. Lol.

Happy Christmas to you and all the CFs.

@FangedFrisbee Hugs!! No one should be treated like that. I hope you dumped his ass and found someone better.

@FangedFrisbee utter bastards. That made me cry

My cousin brought her kitten to my house where 3 dogs live.

2 of my dogs are not cat friendly. She asked if she could bring the kitten when she text me a picture when she got it and I said no because of the dogs. She asked if I could shut my dogs away for the day, I said no. She turns up with the kitten anyway. I told her to leave but she's welcome to come back without the cat. She wasn't happy but left after she finally realised that I wasn't giving into her tears.

One Christmas our Sil walked out on our DD and 3 grandchildren the eldest was nearly 4. She took him back in the January. (Not our place to tell her don't)
Fast forward to the next December and on the day before Christmas eve he did it
again.
We were hosting that year. Christmas eve he phoned us up to ask if he could still come for Christmas lunch as he didn't have time to cook.

I hope you told him where to go??

No we didn't. DD is a better person than us.
She said it was OK for him to come.
As it was all for the children
His children didn't bother with him.
(Still don't 12 years later)
This time she didn't take him back.

My mum visited her brother and sil one Christmas. When she was there sil asked if she liked bovril as they'd bought a jar and decided they didn't like it. Mum said yes, and sil gave her the opened jar and then asked her for payment! Mum said she was so shocked she just paid up.

Not me a friend. FIL and BIL came for dinner. Came about an hour before serving up.
BIL says nothing but how hungry he was that he was STARVING, how long would it be because he couldn’t cope.
Friend and DH went to finish dinner. In the time they were gone he ate every single bit of chocolate in living room. Hers, DHs and all 3 children’s. She said it was tons, loads of selection boxes etc.
Said she over-catered dinner to expect leftovers and he ate, everything, an enormous amount, trying to push the children aside to get food. Ate all the different puddings, again meant to be leftovers.
then sat and complained about how he was STILL hungry and was that it and wasn’t there anything else. At this point FIL removed him. Never said thanks but he thought he would come again next year (he wasn’t invited).

We were going away for Christmas and some friends asked if they could use the house while we were away for some of their family who were travelling from Scotland. We happily agreed as they were good friends.

The journey back home was awful (traffic and a nine month old baby). When we arrived back home, the house smelt awful. The people who had been staying had a dog. The dog had been ill and had been sick/ had diarrhoea in the lounge. They had not cleaned it up. I could have cried, I was just so exhausted. I spent four hours that evening cleaning the mess and trying to get rid of the smell. It took three days to get rid of the smell completely.

Our friends were very apologetic and offered us some money to pay for any damage (which we did not accept - as the carpet was very old). I was just so shocked that someone would leave a house (that they had stayed in free of charge) in that state.

Please reply. If the relationship is almost dead in the water use the opportunity to call them out on their selfishness!

Not as good/bad as some of these, but still…

I threw a Christmas party a few years back and one of my friends brought her mother - an ‘oldest swinger in town’ type who has joined us on a couple of nights out. I didn’t mind; it wasn’t as if it was a dinner party or something, where an extra guest would make a difference. However, it was when I showed them towards the food that she announced she was a gluten intolerant vegan. I said I was sorry, but I didn’t think there was anything she could eat. She said “Oh, don’t worry - I can just have some salad”.

I said “Well, there isn’t any salad”. She looked at me as if I’d grown an extra head. “No salad? Not any?” I said I hadn’t bothered as it always ends up getting wasted. She said, “But that means there’s nothing I can eat”. I said I was sorry about that, but obviously I hadn’t known she was coming (hint hint). She didn’t seem to get that perhaps it was a bit rich to just turn up at a party uninvited and expect her very specific dietary requirements to have been catered to just in case. In fact, she referenced her lack of food several times during the evening.

As she was going, she actually said “Next time you invite me over, Stan, do some salad”, complete with a patronising little pat on the hand, as if I’d done very well for a first try and just needed to be more considerate in the future. I hadn’t even invited her once! And never did again.

Just say you assume the same with theirs :)

Some of these are terribly upsetting. I'm so sorry you had to endure such shite.

Several years ago, it was my parents' turn to host 'extended family Christmas get together'.
My mother is one of six. Extended family is pretty large.
My parents hired a local hall and had catered for 40. This included a wide selection of alcohol drinks. It was a significant expense, but their house isn't vaguely suitable for the number of relatives involved.

My (very wealthy) Auntie picked up the unopened bottles of Baileys and Cognac.
She told my father that she would take them, as they would make fabulous Christmas gifts for a couple of her friends. She offered to make an unspecified donation to charity in return.......

My very accommodating parents told her that this would not be happening. I was actually astonished that they refused, because we were so blown away by the CFery involved.
Some people are insane.

@FangedFrisbee I can't stop thinking about you and your 15yo self. I pray that you have good friends and a decent partner round you now.

@Sugarfree23 oh yes I have an amazing DH now.

I'm so happy now. It was a learning curve that's for sure but I am happy :) I'd also never let our kids treat their partners like that or do it myself!

My sister gave my husband the poinsettia she had bought herself at the start of December, stating "the leaves are all falling off and I get sick of poinsettias by the time Christmas comes round!"

@FangedFrisbee I'm so heartened to hear that.🙂
It wouldn't allow that to happen in my family either. During the moment of quiet reflection in church (my annual church visit is the midnight service) you and the teens who are in care today were certainly in my thoughts.

I'm so glad to hear this.

Wishing you a merry Christmas and many more merry Christmas' to come.

Agree.

And I think JL hit it perfectly with their Xmas advert this year.

I bloody love these threads. Thankfully I don't have anything to add.

Well, the only thing that really comes to mind is a couple of years ago when a couple we are friends with turned up on Xmas eve for a visit (normal in our circle) and we had a great time but drank all the booze I'd bought for Xmas day! We don't usually drink at home so I only bought what I thought we needed. I had to send DH out in the morning to find somewhere open to replace it and it ended up costing a fortune from the petrol station.

Yeah, I mean how the fuck did they not have bread and cheese?