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Original poster

Incident in Solihull

776 replies

YoSofi · 11/12/2022 17:30

Comments on news reports are saying that five children/young teens have gone through ice into a lake and are in a critical condition.

Really hope that all involved make a full recovery

OP posts:
Cattenberg · 12/12/2022 20:20

I remember the film with the little boy in the Kait in the pylons, and the only thing I took away from from that is I don’t own a kite so it doesn’t affect me.

Those films left me terrified of pylons and sub-stations for many years. I avoided them as much as possible. So I suppose the films worked on some kids.

WhiteFire · 12/12/2022 20:24

DH always says that "Dark Waters" was one of the worst and he doesn't understand how it ever came to be shown.

oakleaffy · 12/12/2022 20:26

Tiredallofthetime · 12/12/2022 19:11

People wanting the age of the PIF back - how do we then account for the fact that these sorts of incidents are horrifying but far more unusual than once?

Doesn’t it rather show that you can educate a child until your voice has gone but actually what children need until a certain age is supervision?

(That is in no way apportioning blame for this particular tragedy, it is a general point.)

Supervision is obviously the preferred thing, but there are times when parents can be more 'Relaxed ' for whatever reason, and allow children out of their sight, especially if in a group of children, where they feel there is ''Safety in numbers''.

A child I know, 11, on her own, tired , thought she could cross the Thames at low tide where the London Apprentice is... She was pushing her bike.
Passersby being obviously concerned made her think twice.

She had no idea how deep it was, even at low tide .

She could easily have been swept away. Kids do some crazy things. {There is an island in the thames that is reachable to on foot at low tide, the girl thought it was the same at the other side of the island.. Not so!

DarkKarmaIlama · 12/12/2022 20:27

I live locally and I have heard (although of course everything is speculation) one of the boys accidentally got one leg stuck in the ice and the other boys tried to assist. I don’t think they were just recklessly playing on the ice, and even if they were kids will be kids, they haven’t got the risk assessment skills that adults have.

My head is just absolutely banging from this news 😢. Feels so awful being on your doorstep.

I can only hope it was incredibly quick for them all.

SleepingStandingUp · 12/12/2022 20:29

I've jsut seen the update on the four boys. It's beyond tragic, I feel sick for the pain their parents must be in, trying not to contemplate that the 6 yo was probably one of the others siblings.

I tried to talk to DS on the way to school about it, not that we have any ponds, but about not going on anyway, shouting no and leaving, telling and adult but it's so hard to get it to stick at their age. Just kiddies messing about having fun in the snow.
Those poor poor families.

idonotmind · 12/12/2022 20:49

Absolutely heartbreaking. Those poor boys and their poor families.

Pelo22 · 12/12/2022 21:08

SleepingStandingUp · 12/12/2022 20:29

I've jsut seen the update on the four boys. It's beyond tragic, I feel sick for the pain their parents must be in, trying not to contemplate that the 6 yo was probably one of the others siblings.

I tried to talk to DS on the way to school about it, not that we have any ponds, but about not going on anyway, shouting no and leaving, telling and adult but it's so hard to get it to stick at their age. Just kiddies messing about having fun in the snow.
Those poor poor families.

I think teach them what to do as well
So how to ring 999
What they can do to help in any situation - shout for help, wave the ambulance down etc
Basic first aid - if blood is pouring out to put pressure on it with something like a t shirt, put a burn under cold water
It's the little things that stick with them so if you burn yourself after swearing then asking them "what do you do if you get a burn?"

The thing is children are often so much more capable than adults in an emergency.
(Description changed for anon reasons)
I spoke to a child once (10-12yo) who has rung 999, described the issue, couldn't give an address but knew the local nickname and how to get there so we found it, produced a high viz vest out of their bag to put on for an air ambulance to see them and done about ten other things that an adult would have struggled with. All that and totally calm

panko · 12/12/2022 22:07

🕯

Pipsquiggle · 12/12/2022 22:13

Just heard the ages of those poor boys, the same age of my 2 DC. It's heart breaking. Sending love to all those affected.

PepsiMaxAholic · 12/12/2022 23:38

Thighdentitycrisis · 12/12/2022 18:27

From 50 years ago I can clear as day see in my minds eye an illustration of a man rescuing a child from the ice by climbing along a long ladder he had laid out on the ice. It was explained that this helped spread his weight and made it safer.
I think it was really important that the reason for not walking on the ice is explained (physics) rather than just being told by adults it’s dangerous , don’t do it. That isn’t always enough. So tragic that teaching life skills was sidelined.

I remember that exact video! I'm 39 and we were shown it at school too. Always stayed with me.

NotSnowedUnder · 13/12/2022 06:17

They may well have know about the dangers for all we know.

Sometimes people do risky things. Our dog fell in a river a few months ago and we went in after him. We knew we shouldn't but we did. We know all about the dangers. Sometimes you just 'do' things.

Justthisonce12 · 13/12/2022 07:28

@Emotionalsupportviper

I doubt that that group would want their children told off by a policeman

my understanding, is they that you don’t actually get a choice as to whether you get told off by a policeman or not, it is the policing by consent agreement. I do think that’s different from some interfering biddie at a DIY Centre .

Given its the emergency services that literally deal with the consequences i doubt anyone would support complaints.

CourtneeLuv · 13/12/2022 07:37

Tiredallofthetime · 12/12/2022 18:39

@PlaitBilledDuckyPuss , have you seen those PIFs?

From memory; there is the dark water one which does say something like ‘I lie in wait for silly children who <insert dangerous thing> I have no power over sensible children.’

Theres a Say No to Strangers one where a child goes off with a man and the voiceover says something about her being a silly girl who should have waited for her mum.

There are numerous firework ones where the underlying message is that the children were poorly behaved.

These aren’t featuring teens or preteens. Five year olds aren’t responsible for ‘poor decisions!’ I just feel it’s poor taste (the videos, not your personal view I mean.) I’m glad we’ve shifted away from blaming children and making parents take responsibility.

But it is poor behaviour if you do something you've been told not to do Confused

I actually think we haven't moved towards parents taking responsibility, a lot of society has shifted to expect the government or schools to be responsible.

Personal responsibility seems to be a thing of the past in a lot of cases.

RocketIceLollie · 13/12/2022 07:40

Such an horrific tragedy. It was on my mind a lot yesterday. It's one of those ones that even though you don't live nearby it sort of really hits you how tragic it is.

Zonder · 13/12/2022 07:41

Just listening to a local councillor on radio 4. He was audibly upset as he spoke. He said he thought the children might have been playing football near the water, not actually playing on it. What a terrible tragedy. I guess some laws will be made as a result.

sashh · 13/12/2022 07:46

Pascor · 12/12/2022 12:22

I don't understabd why so many posts say things like "how awful right before Christmas"....as if it makes any difference what time of year it is when your child dies? It's pretty crass.

And yes, kids play out, that's great. Mine do/did. But at 6, 8 years old, next to lake, in sub zero temperatures...that's not normal, or ok.

Because the parents probably have toys hidden away, things that they knew their children would love and be excited about.

And every year at this time there will be songs in the shops, on the radio, films on Tv, it will feel like everyone is having a party while you are mourning your child and buying flowers as their only gift.

Yes a child death is tragic and all parents suffer, but at this time of year when the majority of people are enjoying themselves, baking with their kids, having elf on the shelf, plans to visit Santa or just a couple of weeks off school they are going to feel it.

elderlyhippo · 13/12/2022 08:05

Zonder · 13/12/2022 07:41

Just listening to a local councillor on radio 4. He was audibly upset as he spoke. He said he thought the children might have been playing football near the water, not actually playing on it. What a terrible tragedy. I guess some laws will be made as a result.

What sort of law did you have in mind?

panko · 13/12/2022 08:20

sashh · 13/12/2022 07:46

Because the parents probably have toys hidden away, things that they knew their children would love and be excited about.

And every year at this time there will be songs in the shops, on the radio, films on Tv, it will feel like everyone is having a party while you are mourning your child and buying flowers as their only gift.

Yes a child death is tragic and all parents suffer, but at this time of year when the majority of people are enjoying themselves, baking with their kids, having elf on the shelf, plans to visit Santa or just a couple of weeks off school they are going to feel it.

Show quote history

They'll feel it any time of year

Zonder · 13/12/2022 08:20

@elderlyhippo they were talking about signage in particular. So perhaps places will suddenly have to put more warnings about icy water.

panko · 13/12/2022 08:21

RocketIceLollie · 13/12/2022 07:40

Such an horrific tragedy. It was on my mind a lot yesterday. It's one of those ones that even though you don't live nearby it sort of really hits you how tragic it is.

Yes I agree. This has hit me hard.

I hope in time there is some sort of memorial.

Zonder · 13/12/2022 08:24

They'll feel it any time of year

True but ime it really is worse to lose someone at Christmas. So many plans, presents, hopes all gone. If you lose them earlier in the year it's still horrendous but you don't have all those plans dashed when everyone else is being happy and jolly.

sashh · 13/12/2022 08:53

panko · 13/12/2022 08:20

They'll feel it any time of year

Show quote history

There are often threads on here about your best and worst X, Y Z.

And it's things like the turkey being eaten by the family lab, or being given a vacuum as a present.

Just have a think abut your worst Xmas.

For these families it's going to be 2022.

Original poster
YoSofi · 13/12/2022 09:04

panko · 13/12/2022 08:20

They'll feel it any time of year

Show quote history

Yes they will, of course they will, but this time of year does make it harder for some people.

I lost a young sibling at this time of year, Christmas is a time for family. Seeing everyone surrounded by loved ones, family trips out, the excitement suddenly turning to absolute horror, the unopened gifts, the adverts, the music….it’s feels particularly cruel. I can’t really describe it properly, but to lose children at this time of year especially? I can’t imagine I really can’t.

OP posts:
SinnerBoy · 13/12/2022 09:23

On school assemblies talking about this, they did one at my DD's school, yesterday. She brought a friend round and I asked if they knew about it, the other girl did, but mine didn't, despite being in the assembly, so I showed her an article.

As others have said, information about danger doesn't always get through and needs to be reiterated.

I was quite annoyed, because her 18 year old cousin drowned during the summer holidays and she was distraught for a long time. There's an old quarry near her school and we often go there to feed the waterfowl. She isn't to go there without an adult, so I told her that if, on the off chance she does, not to go on the ice.

Some kids went through it last year, close to us. Fortunately, it's barely knee deep at the edge and they got out easily.

VivaDixie · 13/12/2022 09:34

DS2 Secondary school are talking about this in tutor time this morning and are sharing this poster. I wanted to share this with you all in the spirit of this thread being a source of information and support.

Also - I am nearly 50 and to this day I am still terrified of pylons and have a fear that if I step on a train track it will electrocute me! I am going to look for some online (which don't feature the disgraced BBC presenter) to show my boys.

Incident in Solihull