Incident in Solihull

[YoSofi]

Comments on news reports are saying that five children/young teens have gone through ice into a lake and are in a critical condition.

Really hope that all involved make a full recovery

@PauliString being a bereaved parent is terrible but it's not a free pass to make dreadful, offensive comments. The post about 'get in the sea' was vile.
And please don't suggest anything I've written is offensive because it isn't.

I'm not sure you know what the phrase 'get in the sea' means?

Yeap, I know how it originated thanks.
It's a completely inappropriate and offensive comment on this thread, in this context.

@Kolakalia I am so sorry for your tragic loss. Thank you for sharing your experience which has raised my awareness.

Also @MrsXx4 , so sorry for the loss of your child. Thank you for being generous enough to share your experience and perspective, painful thoughts it must be.

@electricmoccasins 'You can tell children something over and over, they very often don’t listen.'

True. I think once children are school age, the emphasis has to be on not just telling them what not to do, but the peer pressure aspect. How to resist when they're part of a group, because when one child does something, it can be really hard to follow the messaging that parents have given.

There I absolutely agree with you, Freya.

Do we know whether the boys were friends or siblings? My heart is broken for their families. I hope they are surrounded by unconditional love and support, as they try to process what has happened.

I pray the souls of the boys are at peace.

Utterly tragic. My thoughts are with the families and the emergency services.
We have a large pond nearby when I saw it frozen on Saturday my first thought was I hope children don’t play on this (it’s surrounded by new builds with young families)
I recall public information films and talks in schools. I wonder if there is a way for such things to come back. I vividly recall a man talking to us in secondary about not trespassing on railway line - he told a story about boy who died and added that was my brother. Girls were crying but I’ve never forgotten (30 yrs later)

Peer pressure is a definite factor in kids doing dangerous things.
Especially with older children about.
Not wanting to be left behind when older kids go somewhere, or do something dangerous.

But would these children have necessarily known that walking on ice was dangerous?
films and cartoons of skating on ice makes it look such fun.
Children as others have said Cannot risk assess situations.

They need a sensible adult to do that for them.

Accidents can happen in a split second, as we all know.

I think it's rehearsing it as closely as possible. We also had the Green Cross Code Man (man dressed up in green lycra!) - but our parents rehearsed the 'stop, look, listen' routine as well.

I have a friend who is a secondary school teacher and heavily involved in the pastoral care side. She has horrendous stories of on-line grooming. Yet the school does endless sessions on staying safe on-line, and when asked the pupils can recite what they 'should' do - but are not necessarily able to connect that with what they actually do.

@Sigma33 yes, there's no easy way of assessing whether a child will act on the message they've given because very often they'll recite perfectly back what they should do, but it's not necessarily what they will do

It does strike me though that many people have commented on here remembering in detail those public information films, because they had the shock factor.

I wonder if we've become so aware of not upsetting children, and treading softly softly that we're actually doing them a disservice. If hard hitting, shocking methods will get the message across more effectively then surely it's worth the potential upset because it's doing the job.

Yes I remember those. Gave us all nightmares BUT the messages stayed with us and I know that it kept us safer.

So very sad, poor children 😞

As I said upthread, my first reaction to a saucepan fire from overheated oil was the exact opposite of the scary public info films I saw endlessly as a child (25-30 years on). My second thought was to follow what had been shown.

So I do think they are of benefit, but in the heat of the moment (literally in my case!) they are not the default.

In the US, they do the shooting drills every term without fail to make sure the message sinks in, and the even when in crisis the kids go into default mode for want of a better word. Same with countries that suffer from earthquakes. This stuff does need practising and we don’t do it while in the UK.

It does strike me though that many people have commented on here remembering in detail those public information films, because they had the shock factor

This, so much. Does anyone remember the one where a group of youths are throwing fireworks and it ends with one exploding in a passer-by girl’s face? Her scream…!

I also remember the don’t play with matches one where the boy gets locked in the shed and I think his face had burns.

The thing is when I was young and watching these (as young as five), I thought the events and people were real, not scripted. They were done very naturally and absolutely thought the burns on that boy’s face were real.

Children don’t watch TV in real-time now though. In fact, they don’t watch TV. When channels were putting these out in the 1970s and 80s, it’s likely 25% of children were seeing them at any time. There isn’t such a captive audience now.

Afaik with this or something like someone jumping into a river you ask for fire service as they have the specialistvgear for a rescue, you will also need police to manage the scene in many cases and obviously ambulance should the rescue be successful..... Basically name all 3 services to be safe and ensure theres no delays

Are they still searching for others in the water?

couldn’t stop thinking about this last night then the gut wrenching update today :( Just horrible. Hoping and praying for the little one in hospital.

This is so haunting, isn't it? So many questions and such a tragedy.

@Sabrinasouffle
The Public information films are on you tube.
they definitely pull no punches.

This is scary... but also show children Doing the right thing eg, extending a stick in the water to help a child in the water.

I tell you what I will judge, those grief whores pushing their traumatised children in front of the tv cameras to he ‘interviewed’. Why would you do that! Take them home, hold them close and bloody look after them!

The ten-year-old’s name and image has been released to the media.

This is so terrible! Thinking of these families tonight.

I grew up beside the sea so water safety was drummed into us by my dad, who also taught the neighbour kids how to swim as well. And I'm doing likewise with DS.

But it didn't even occur to me to discuss winter water safety with him.

Children don’t watch TV in real-time now though. In fact, they don’t watch TV. When channels were putting these out in the 1970s and 80s, it’s likely 25% of children were seeing them at any time. There isn’t such a captive audience now.

Yes and they watch it very differently as well e.g on an iPad or laptop - rather than all the family watching one screen, talking about it in shock etc and then going into school to talk about it again with friends

This is just tragic - so sad!

I have been talking about this with my 10 year old ds and explaining - as I have many times before - why he should never, ever go onto ice or in open water. He said to me quite innocently “why didn’t they swim out?” - that’s the way a child’s mind works. And this is a child I’ve told many times not to go near ice - we live rurally surrounded by lakes etc and he never plays out alone. I just think they don’t have the same risk awareness we do. I have been trying to explain the danger of the cold water to him, as well as the ice itself.