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Original poster

I shoplifted today and I'm kicking myself so much

128 replies

Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 16:51

..and I don't know why, or what I was thinking.

I could have bought the item. It wasn't something I needed either.

It was a tester tube of concealer in a department store. I had to wait around for my online order to be found, saw the concealer and had a sudden urge to put it in my pocket.

I regretted it as soon as I left the shop and wanted to go back in to apologise but bottled it.

I haven't done anything like that before and wouldn't again, but what the fuck is wrong with me that I would risk being arrested for something as pointless as a tester tube of concealer I didn't need.

There's no excuse.

I'm going to have to go back and show my face aren't I? Can I pay for it, even though they don't sell the testers?

NC for obv reasons. I'm a regular. MN could verify.

OP posts:
Spliffle · 09/12/2022 19:47

We had this with dc in a (long thin) double buggy. Whilst dh was browsing camera equipment, the dc were thoughtfully helping themselves to computer games that were handily positioned in one of those wire crates just at their level. How no one saw it I'll never know. Young enough to be in a buggy, I don't think they even knew what they were playing with. The seat hoods were up somewhat & we just didn't see. Even walking through the exit & all the alarms going off didn't make us aware. We just assumed it was someone else. It was only when we got to the car (after we'd visited several other shops) that we found their stash. Well over £100 worth!! Shock

PurpleButterflyWings · 09/12/2022 19:47

Don't go back.

Don't do it again.

As has been suggested, give some money to your favourite charity.

Hope you're OK. Flowers

oakleaffy · 09/12/2022 19:47

Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 19:43

I've never heard of poor mental health being a pre cursor for shoplifting, is that really a thing?

I felt so shit about it I had to unburden myself to DH who if anything made me feel even worse, saying how bad it is. He works in retail and has probably had it up to his eyeballs of shop lifters.

I've had a bit of a cry at the comments. I expected to have my arse handed to me. Thank you.

I don't think it matters what brand it is but it was under £15 to buy the actual boxed and for sale item. Make of that what you will.

I think I'll do as suggested and just bin it, I'll also make a donation to charity.

Donation to charity is an excellent idea.

And yes, shoplifting is definitely linked to stress and/or poor mental health, especially for things as 'One off' as this.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Beauty
boatyardblues · 09/12/2022 19:48

TheYearOfSmallThings · 09/12/2022 16:55

Btw I've never shoplifted but my DS went through a phase of swiping everything he could reach from his buggy, so I have lots of experience of running into stores, shovelling hair scrunchies and fruit pouches and phone cards back onto the shelves, and running like the wind. Nobody ever commented.

We had to return some sparkly girls’ ballerina shoes to Mothercare which toddler DS1 swiped. It was like parting Gollum from his precious. We were waved out of the store, in part to make the noise go away. 😄

Prettypissedoff88 · 09/12/2022 19:50

Just go back in and say ‘I was in here the other day and I Picked this up with the intention of paying for it and must have just walked out of the shop with it… I found it today and came straight back. I’m so sorry. Can I pay for it now?’

my mum once walked out of M&S in a shopping centre with a hanger of vests and some knickers in her hand. She must have walked past 5 security guards. It was before the days of alarms….. and no one challenged her. She was so annoyed when she got to the car in the car park at least a 10 min walk away that she went home and called them and told them what she had done and told them she would pay for them next time she came in. To be fair though, it was in the 1980s…. There was a certain amount of trust back then.

more important is to understand why….. because that’s a strange thing to do.

Comedycook · 09/12/2022 19:51

Just go back in and say ‘I was in here the other day and I Picked this up with the intention of paying for it and must have just walked out of the shop with it… I found it today and came straight back. I’m so sorry. Can I pay for it now?

Don't talk daft. It's a tester. It's not even for sale.

Whynobreadpudding · 09/12/2022 20:00

Or just buy another one from there full price.

Zone2NorthLondon · 09/12/2022 20:09

Prettypissedoff88 · 09/12/2022 19:50

Just go back in and say ‘I was in here the other day and I Picked this up with the intention of paying for it and must have just walked out of the shop with it… I found it today and came straight back. I’m so sorry. Can I pay for it now?’

my mum once walked out of M&S in a shopping centre with a hanger of vests and some knickers in her hand. She must have walked past 5 security guards. It was before the days of alarms….. and no one challenged her. She was so annoyed when she got to the car in the car park at least a 10 min walk away that she went home and called them and told them what she had done and told them she would pay for them next time she came in. To be fair though, it was in the 1980s…. There was a certain amount of trust back then.

more important is to understand why….. because that’s a strange thing to do.

Ridiculous suggestion. How can she pay for a tester how’s that work? Why put self in a compromising situation to atone for an out of character moment triggered by stress.

Zone2NorthLondon · 09/12/2022 20:10

Whynobreadpudding · 09/12/2022 20:00

Or just buy another one from there full price.

Why? What does that achieve? Steal one,buy one?

DepIndoChridmadWidMe · 09/12/2022 20:12

Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 19:43

I've never heard of poor mental health being a pre cursor for shoplifting, is that really a thing?

I felt so shit about it I had to unburden myself to DH who if anything made me feel even worse, saying how bad it is. He works in retail and has probably had it up to his eyeballs of shop lifters.

I've had a bit of a cry at the comments. I expected to have my arse handed to me. Thank you.

I don't think it matters what brand it is but it was under £15 to buy the actual boxed and for sale item. Make of that what you will.

I think I'll do as suggested and just bin it, I'll also make a donation to charity.

Your DH is being a bit of a dick. I can't imagine being arsey about shoplifting if my partner was going through a stressful time.

VladmirsPoutine · 09/12/2022 20:12

That you stole a tester shows you absolutely were out of your mind. Testers are gross and I can't imagine you'd want to incorporate it with your other products. In your position I'd take it back but if you feel too embarrased then time is your friend. Your shock and disgust at your behaviour shows remorse - not the makings of a small time shoplifter. I know it sounds trite but you're going through a lot so be kind to yourself.

Zone2NorthLondon · 09/12/2022 20:13

I've never heard of poor mental health being a pre cursor for shoplifting, is that really a thing? ⬅️Absolutely YES not super common but not uncommon either

dayswithaY · 09/12/2022 20:15

There’s a lot of people here giving advice they wouldn't follow themselves. Go back in and tell overworked staff your shameful secret? As if!

It’s a tester, it has no real value. The staff will think it got dropped by a customer and has rolled under a counter, lost forever. No one will care, they’ll just get another tester out of the drawer.

Do not take it back, do not explain yourself to the staff - they have enough on their plate. No one is looking for you on CCTV and even if they did - they’re not going to send a SWAT team round. The things I’ve seen shoplifters take - hundreds of pounds of stock and staff just take it off them and tell them not to come back as it’s just quicker and easier that way.

Throw it in your bin, tomorrow’s another day, move on.

Original poster
Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 20:16

DepIndoChridmadWidMe · 09/12/2022 20:12

Your DH is being a bit of a dick. I can't imagine being arsey about shoplifting if my partner was going through a stressful time.

Show quote history

Do you think so? His reaction did surprise me, I wouldn't expect him to whoop and cheer but I think if the shoe were on the other foot I'd be worried about/for him before it ever occurred to be judgemental.

He's very black and white my DH. He doesn't tend to look at nuances, something is either OK or it isn't.

OP posts:
PrincessScarlett · 09/12/2022 20:23

Do not take it back OP. You could come up against a real jobsworth (perhaps someone like your DH) who would have you arrested for shoplifting. You do not need this extra aggravation on top of other things you have going on.

Be kind to yourself and good luck with your biopsy results.

Notaboutthebass · 09/12/2022 20:30

I'd take it back, not because they can sell it, but because it will make you feel better. Just say your 1 year old put it in their pocket!

CanStopWillStop · 09/12/2022 20:34

I accidentally shoplifted a pair of jeans for DH in Matalan (forgot to scan one at self checkout as I was buying 6 pairs for him to try on at home)

only realised when I took the jeans back to refund the ones that didn’t fit, one pair wasn’t on the receipt 😂 very confusing for all parties, DH can try them on in store next time, I’m not doing jail time for him lol

Thewildling · 09/12/2022 20:37

@Notanotherwindow I’m not sure where you live but I can’t imagine police wasting their time prosecuting over op taking a make up tester. Don’t be so dramatic 🤣

BT11 · 09/12/2022 20:39

I used to work in retail. People steal all the time. Doesn't make it right or ok to do.
In all honesty the staff most likely won't even notice or care. Dont beat yourself up to much. Impulse is a funny thing sometimes!

I've read about celebrities who steal just for excitement 🤷🏻‍♀️

Thewildling · 09/12/2022 20:39

Stress can definitely make you do things out of the ordinary so I would not worry about it. Take some heart that you have a conscience.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 09/12/2022 20:41

Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 16:51

..and I don't know why, or what I was thinking.

I could have bought the item. It wasn't something I needed either.

It was a tester tube of concealer in a department store. I had to wait around for my online order to be found, saw the concealer and had a sudden urge to put it in my pocket.

I regretted it as soon as I left the shop and wanted to go back in to apologise but bottled it.

I haven't done anything like that before and wouldn't again, but what the fuck is wrong with me that I would risk being arrested for something as pointless as a tester tube of concealer I didn't need.

There's no excuse.

I'm going to have to go back and show my face aren't I? Can I pay for it, even though they don't sell the testers?

NC for obv reasons. I'm a regular. MN could verify.

Bizarrely coincidental to see your post! I feel your self horror! I placed gift wrap tape on the stroller yesterday, got distracted, and ended up walking away with it. Didn't notice it until I was putting the stroller in the car. Since baby was already strapped into the car seat I couldn't be bothered to return to the shop. Wondering if security saw me but ignored it taking pity ...🤷‍♀️

LuckySantangelo35 · 09/12/2022 20:48

@Shittyperson

please do not beat yourself up OP

you are not a shitty person as your name on here states

look after yourself 💐

TribeD · 09/12/2022 21:11

username8888 · 09/12/2022 18:03

And what if they suspect someone stole it (its gone after all) and check through CCTV?

Show quote history

I worked in retail for years in all sizes of stores from a little branch of The Body Shop, right through to massive department stores.

Shoplifting is one of those things that stores know happens. Branches of Selfridges probably have a CCTV team, store detectives, and security, and rightly so. But High Street retailers (for instance a well known chemist beginning with B) more than likely won't have much more than CCTV, which if anyone was inclined to watch, would probably show half a dozen shoplifters in the space of a few hours.

OP you've had a momentary blip. Bin the item, be kind to yourself and put this behind you.

(You are not the person who, over a period of several months, stole a complete set of Dorma Bedding)

Prettypissedoff88 · 09/12/2022 22:00

@Zone2NorthLondon @Comedycook i just reread the OP and I missed that bit! Sorry my mistake.
OP just bin it.

belge · 13/12/2022 20:07

Hi OP, I wanted to reach out. I shoplifted last week and feel so ashamed. It was similarly a beauty product and worth only a few quid and I got caught! I'm lucky in that I'm so incredibly shit at shoplifting and the security guy could see how out of character it looked that he just laughed it off, but took me back to the till after I offered to pay for it. I don't normally steal things, although have pocketed a few similarly low value items in the past before in times of stress, I must admit. It feels horrible, doesn't it, and as someone with a conscience nobody could ever make you feel worse about it than you feel in yourself. I think you've had some good advice on this thread about trying to get to the bottom of why you did it, and it's helped me reading this too. I think everything is just so miserable at the moment, I'm desperately alone in the world, the holiday season is coming up, I hate my poorly paid job and I think I wanted just a little treat - which is in no way an excuse, just trying to figure it out. I hope you are feeling a bit better now anyway. I don't feel I can show my face in this shop again, I feel so embarrassed and ashamed.