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Original poster

I shoplifted today and I'm kicking myself so much

128 replies

Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 16:51

..and I don't know why, or what I was thinking.

I could have bought the item. It wasn't something I needed either.

It was a tester tube of concealer in a department store. I had to wait around for my online order to be found, saw the concealer and had a sudden urge to put it in my pocket.

I regretted it as soon as I left the shop and wanted to go back in to apologise but bottled it.

I haven't done anything like that before and wouldn't again, but what the fuck is wrong with me that I would risk being arrested for something as pointless as a tester tube of concealer I didn't need.

There's no excuse.

I'm going to have to go back and show my face aren't I? Can I pay for it, even though they don't sell the testers?

NC for obv reasons. I'm a regular. MN could verify.

OP posts:
millymog11 · 09/12/2022 18:06

I would echo OP that often urges like this have a clear emotional source. I have seen people who are very stressed do this in an extremely out-of-character way. Also depression or a feeling of hopelessness or feeling cheated/betrayed can trigger people I have known to do it.

Deathraystare · 09/12/2022 18:06

I only did it once - deliberately when I was young. Well, mum would not let me have juicy fruit chewing gum (yeah that disgusting smelly stuff). She found the wrappers in the loo bin and read me the riot act! It did not help that that that afternoon while playing in a friend's front garden, 2 burly policemen rocked up to our house! I later found out that something had fallen off of Dad's bike and they were returning it to him. Mum let me sweat!

Since then I never have but have a habit of putting thing under my arm and suddenly realising at the cash desk that something is in the way!

dontgobaconmyheart · 09/12/2022 18:06

A small transgression in a time of stress really doesn't say anything about who you are as a person OP, albeit it may suggest you need some sort of outlet for how you're feeling about the things you're going through - even if it''s just talking to a friend about it.

As someone who worked in retail and retail management for years I can confidently assure you that absolutely nobody will care, and likely won't even notice for some time, and more likely ever. Opportunistic and career theft is so inordinately high in retail that it will be happening constantly as is, especially at this time of year. The police will have absolutely no interest in this either, being of such nominal value and there being no repeat offending (eg you have been banned from the store before). The store won't be reporting it to the police because sadly, there is no point in them doing so.

If for your own sake you need to return it then that's what you need to do but I would just bin it (because its unhygienic anyway), forgive yourself and look forward.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Beauty
Ilikewinter · 09/12/2022 18:07

username8888 · 09/12/2022 18:03

And what if they suspect someone stole it (its gone after all) and check through CCTV?

Show quote history

Cosmetic testers get stolen ALL of he time. No one is going to trawl through hours of CCTV for a tester thief .

Honestly just bin it OP, dont go back, the staff will think youve lost the plot.

TheRealHousewife · 09/12/2022 18:07

Once I was shoe shopping. After having left the shop I discovered a stiletto 👠 had impaled into my wicker basket. Genuine accident. I just took it back. Gave the cashier a bit of a laugh. Just take it back explaining it was an absent minded act. Good luck!

shard5 · 09/12/2022 18:08

If it's tester pot they're not going to put it back on a shelf, they'd just bin it.
No use taking it back really.
Next time you're in the store, if you really feel the need to, you could apologise and explain what happened. In our local boots pre covid you'd see lots of young girls doing their whole face up just with the tester pots

VacancyAtNumber10AGAIN · 09/12/2022 18:10

Don’t bother going back and saying anything, you’ve got a lot going on and it’s all worry for nothing. Tester pots get nicked all the time! Just sling it in the bin, and look after yourself Flowers

SittingTrot · 09/12/2022 18:16

Chuck it in the bin. You've got alot on your plate without adding another layer
Look after yourself @Shittyperson

Hibye23289 · 09/12/2022 18:18

Omg the intensity on here! Op do not take a tester back to the shop, silly excuses like it fell in your bag will make you look batshit crazy.

I'm not interested in any comments I may receive, it is a non sellable tester, you didn't steal from the Sistine Chapel or your gran! It's not that deep and not worth being anxious over, it was out of character, you feel guilty so I think you have learnt your lesson.

Please let it go

CustardySergeant · 09/12/2022 18:19

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 09/12/2022 16:54

Even if you take it back, they won't be able to re-sell it. So don't bother. Just stop making a drama out of nothing.

There weren't going to sell it in the first place. It was a tester.

ILoveeCakes · 09/12/2022 18:23

What if you were recorded and they stop you next time you go into the shop? In front of everyone.

Supersimkin2 · 09/12/2022 18:28

Calm yourself OP. I nicked two huge tins of paint once by mistake - I was staggering out of the shop with a lot to pay for and slung one in the crook of each elbow to get at my purse.

Got home knackered and saw from receipt I hadn’t paid. Had a moment of raw delight then rang the shop in fear and trembling - some paint is really pricy - and they just said come back in and pay.

No drama, didn’t even have to bring the paint back.

You would have thought someone might have noticed: evidently not.

Vitriolinsanity · 09/12/2022 18:32

What if you were recorded and they stop you next time you go into the shop? In front of everyone.

That is absolutely never, ever going to happen. It wasn't a saleable item, it was a tester. More likely, if they've even noticed, they're thinking "who the actual fuck takes a manky old tester?".

The broader point is why you were compelled to do it. That's worth discussing with an expert.

Zone2NorthLondon · 09/12/2022 18:33

ILoveeCakes · 09/12/2022 18:23

What if you were recorded and they stop you next time you go into the shop? In front of everyone.

Don’t be so alarmist you’re really being v silly
your made up what if scenario relies on
store knowing item is missing
reviewing tape and finding the op taking the item,the image quality being adequate to identify @Shittyperson and then the store has a gotcha moment on off chance op returns

most likely store had not not noticed it gone and they probably assume it’s lost or mislaid

Lifeomars · 09/12/2022 18:35

You have taken something that was never for sale and has no resale value in the wider community, a used tester is not something you can shift down at a dodgy pub, it's cheese, meant, booze, etc and at this time of year, kid's toys. This is about you and how you are feeling which I guess is stresed and unhappy. Forgive yourself and think of ways to make you feel more at ease with yourself

ElEmEnOhPee · 09/12/2022 18:37

username8888 · 09/12/2022 18:03

And what if they suspect someone stole it (its gone after all) and check through CCTV?

Show quote history

It's coming up to Christmas, they are likely short staffed ( like everywhere else), no one is going to take the trouble to check CCTV for a missing tester. They won't care, they'll write it off as a loss and assume it was either broken and binned or someone has stolen, but even if they suspect theft they are not trawling hours of CCTV to search for someone over a tester.

Izzy24 · 09/12/2022 18:37

Janieread · 09/12/2022 16:57

Just chuck it in the bin and forget about it. If you are anxious /tired then try and get to the root of why.

This .

hotchocolate6 · 09/12/2022 18:38

I used to work as a merchandiser and was in charge of the makeup stands in a big supermarket. Tester items went missing constantly, people always nicked them. The shop won't care, trust me. Just throw it away, they'd have to anyway if you took it back.

Mañanarama · 09/12/2022 18:41

I don’t understand why people are suggesting she actually speaks to anyone in store! What’s the point of that?! Just put it back next time you’re in there, to clear your conscience.

And, as others have said, be kind to yourself.

Finaldestitution · 09/12/2022 18:42

OP please don’t worry at all. You had a brain blip and I promise that not a solitary soul in that shop will care .
as a teenage runaway I was too young to work a proper job, homeless and desperate . I used to steal literally hundreds if not thousands of pounds worth of cosmetics and clothes each week because it meant I didnt have to sell my body that weekend to survive . Every bottle of perfume or pair of trainers I flogged in the pub was one less middle aged scumbag I had to entertain and at 15/16 it was my only choice to stay warm and fed .
obviously I had clear motivation but my point is , I wasn’t careful, I half wanted to get caught in the hope someone might help me and give me some childhood back , but with all the brazen half arsed careless pocketing of expensive shit not once did I get stopped / caught .
I promise you that no one in the world is bothered and I want you to stop thinking about it . Donate a fiver to a charity and try to get on top of whatever’s sent you a bit loopy .
all the best .

Goldpaw · 09/12/2022 18:45

Shittyperson · 09/12/2022 17:36

Life is a bit shit at the minute, family stresses and I'm waiting for biopsy results which I'm scared to death about, but none of it excuses stealing 😔

Show quote history

This explains it OP.

I started shoplifting when my life was absolutely shit. I lived with an abusive husband, I wanted to leave, but couldn't, and every day was worse than the last.

I look back and think it was a cry for help. I wanted to be caught so I could tell someone what was going on.

In my case it was self scanners in Waitrose. The next week I'd return and scan through everything I'd stolen the previous week.

It stopped when I did finally manage to pluck up courage to leave. It was about not being able to cope.

I cringe when I think about it, but try and be gentle on myself mostly. In the end everything was paid for.

So be gentle on yourself, OP. Be aware that because of the stress you're under you might be prone to this happening again and be ready for it. You haven't lost your morals.

Algor1thm · 09/12/2022 18:48

If it makes you feel any better, my husband did this years (like 10 years) ago with a chocolate bar. Slipped it up his sleeve and walked out. He says he has no idea why he did it, has never done anything similar before or since. He was so confused, he couldn't even eat it, it just sat in the cupboard for ages (he was too scared/embarrassed to take it back). I was pretty concerned at the time but now it's in the past it's just bizarre and so random.

SuperfastJellyfish · 09/12/2022 18:50

ILoveeCakes · 09/12/2022 18:23

What if you were recorded and they stop you next time you go into the shop? In front of everyone.

😂seriously?

Never gonna happen OP.

My friend works in Boots and they don't even pursue shoplifters who steal expensive items.

Zero point confessing.

It made you feel shit, lesson learned and no one hurt.

Don't waste any more of your time worrying about it.

BorderlineBagpuss · 09/12/2022 18:52

Used to work as a criminal barrister and there are a surprising amount of middle aged women who shoplift. Usually looking for a frisson when something is missing. You’re unhappy with something. I’d dig deeper…

hotchocolate6 · 09/12/2022 18:52

username8888 · 09/12/2022 18:03

And what if they suspect someone stole it (its gone after all) and check through CCTV?

Show quote history

Absolutely zero chance this will happen. Believe me if they had to check CCTV every time a tester went missing (or indeed, for sale makeup products) they'd never do anything else. When I worked on makeup stands every time I went in I had to call and reorder half the missing testers, or bin them because people had damaged them. One time someone had smashed a bottle of foundation and smeared it all over the stand. I cleaned it up and that was that. Supermarkets don't check these things.