LIGHTHEARTED - If you only ever believed things that you read on MN…

[LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet]

You’d believe that….

• If your husband so much as starts shopping in a new supermarket then he’s definitely having an affair
• Tenants who can afford to pay six months rent are drug dealers and will use a rental property as a drug farm
• Sleeping on a bench in a town centre in the middle of the day is perfectly acceptable and extremely common
• That a perfectly acceptable parenting method is, in response to your husband having a night out, to leave a tiny baby and a toddler with him while he can do nothing but vomit in the toilet. This will all end well and you’ll thoroughly enjoy spending the day sat in Costa coffee patting yourself on the back over your victory
• If somebody asks you to do something you don’t want to do, saying “No” and literally nothing else at all, is absolutely fine and gives enough context and definitely doesn’t make you sound like a massive weirdo

Any more for anymore?

The virtue signallers are the best. It’s not so bad now to be fair but used to be poster would recount rude behaviour from a random and others would invent all sorts of mad reasons for the behaviour and explain that they would have given the mean random a hot meal / their car / their first born

I use loo brushes (so shoot me!) but putting them in the dishwasher is grim (and I'm a domestic slattern who's dog gives the plates a prewash as they're going in the dishwasher and it doesn't bother me.)

You either put the brush in it's stand with some bleach, or buy a new one, they cost a couple of quid!

That losing weight is dead easy, and that everyone on MN went from 20st to 12st by just not eating chocolate in the evenings.

That spiders rub their willies on me when I am sleeping. I live in Australia so that is a LOT of willies!

And quite large ones I imagine

I am sick of hearing about my colleagues haemorrhoids

You're just jealous

Or something like that

Don’t forget every child is incredibly bright too.

Spa days are the cure all for all marital woes.

Marriage before babies will prevent you from ever ending up a lone parent in poverty.

Obesity is an individual choice and nothing to do with societal structures.

I think you're missing the point of the thread...

That if you buy someone a Bayliss and Harding set for Christmas it means you don't really like them.

Yes even if it’s a secret Santa that had a £5 limit, it would be less offensive than getting punched in the face

BedTaker · Yesterday 17:18

That soup in a vacuum flask is a really common school packed lunch item.

Oh? I thought my DD was quite unusual, in asking to take soup.

@SinnerBoy

She is!

That's the whole point of this thread!

Oh!

Facepalm!

My school doesn't allow hot food in packed lunches, too much faff when they want help opening it/pouring it out and too much potential for spillages and burns. Cold packed lunches only. This is not uncommon either.

My girl's school seem cool about her taking an insulated cup of tea.

It always comes up on the 'packed lunch suggestions' threads, yet never in my whole 15 years of working in education have I seen a child with a flask of soup in their packed lunch!

The majority of people posting on threads are of course jealous of the OP. Even if the Op has 10 children and not a minute to herself, they are still jealous and wish they too had 10 children.

My child is very bright. With SEN of course. I'm only looking at top universities for them as otherwise university is a waste of time and money. I can't do anything other mums do as I have to care for their SEN, even though they're fiercely independent and walk 40 miles to school every day. Where was I...

That every child and seemingly every adult, has ADHD.

All of them!

Meanwhile, in real life, I know precisely 3 people who have diagnosed ADHD.

DGPs should provide free child care

Yes they bloody well should!!

Derailing the thread sorry , but I use to take soup, stew , chilli and spaghetti hoops ( and toast ) in a flask 30 muffle years ago and in cold weather like this I was the envy of my other pack lunch pals 🍝😁

Derailing the thread sorry , but I use to take soup, stew , chilli and spaghetti hoops ( and toast ) in a flask 30 muffle years ago and in cold weather like this I was the envy of my other pack lunch pals

What, altogether?!?! Blech!!!

Ha ha nope even I wasn't that adventurous.
Usually left overs or in the case of the hoops out of a tin.
I often pestered for tinned corn too , Hot corn with lots of butter and pepper mmmmmm