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Original poster

Scared of motorway - what shall I do?

108 replies

Isitfine · 23/10/2022 19:13

Going on holiday and my partner doesn’t drive so I’m the driver. I’ve only been driving a year and because I was pregnant didn’t drive much and haven’t gone on the motorway yet.

Going away for two nights and leaving baby with grandparents who live in Greater London.
we could get the train but would mean lugging all her stuff and there’s quite a few changes, or I could drive to grandparents which would take half the time near enough but the only thing is I need to go on motorway for 40 miles which I’ve never done and I’m petrified.
But it would be a lot easier.

No chance to practice, I’ve left it too late. Do I just do it or get the train? Any advice to make me less scared?

OP posts:
sashagabadon · 24/10/2022 07:08

Keep to the left except when overtaking and when a side road is merging. Look at and understand overhead signs and keep an eye as far into the distance as possible to predict the traffic and other road users nd that’s it really. 40 miles will be over in 40 minutes more or less so no time at all

Popstops82 · 24/10/2022 07:13

I also don't drive on the motorway, feel like I've left it too long now. Some friends take the Mick abit but I'm genuinely scared. I'd love to be able to just set off somewhere and drive but I can't.
Good Luck OP, i totally sympathise with you and I'm sure you will be fine xx

AnnapurnaSanctuary · 24/10/2022 07:16

Honestly you will be absolutely fine OP. Don't let yourself become one of those drivers who "can't drive on motorways".

KendrickLamaze · 24/10/2022 07:38

Can you drive on a dual carriageway? Then you can drive on a motorway.

As a road, they are much safer than others. However, when an accident does happen, due to the amount of cars they seem much worse.

Go on your own before the trip as a test run, just a junction or so.

You don't need to tear it up. Just stay behind the first lorry you see. There really is nothing to it!

Ghost92 · 24/10/2022 08:17

I’m exactly the same as you, it’s been 10 years since passing my test and I still hate driving on the motorway.
I used to take A roads where I could but now I just force myself to do it. I find the first 5 mins I’m a nervous wreck but then I start to relax as I settle into the drive. It’s really not too bad, just stay on the inside lane and remember to leave plenty of space from the car in front. The more you do it the more confident you’ll become in time. Good luck!

partypants44 · 24/10/2022 08:23

I am nearly 40 and still haven't driven on a motorway. It's such a pain and my life would be so much easier if I could overcome this fear. I have to wait for dh to be available if I want to take the dc anywhere, it's so annoying.

For me it's the junctions and the big roundabouts. I have a shit sense of direction and worry about getting lost, flustered or making a mistake when there's so much fast moving traffic. Watching this thread with interest for any tips on how to overcome this.

2bazookas · 24/10/2022 08:24

Buy a couple of motorway driving lessons from a driving instructor.

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 24/10/2022 08:27

I hear you, I learnt to drive late and felt exactly the same, but it really does get easier the more you do it.

I'd check the weather before I set off, and if it's not decent weather (I really hate being on the motorway in heavy rain or high roads), then I'd stick to A roads. Which motorway/s do you need to be one? Some are definitely better than others.

MariEllie · 24/10/2022 08:30

Motorways are actually the easiest places to drive on. Just sit in the slow lane at 50mph and chug along. Take your time.

Cantthinkofanewnameatm · 24/10/2022 08:31

Find al alternative without motorway for tomorrow then after your break book a motorway driving lesson. Contact your old driving instructor.

LaGioconda · 24/10/2022 08:55

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 23/10/2022 20:09

There's nothing to motorway driving. It's the easiest type of driving because you just drive in a straight line

I wish l felt like this😩

Theres always someone up your backside, or pulling in front of your stopping distance. Or hassling you to move lanes. Or lorries are driving 2abreast and you feel trapped.

l hate the fast lane so much. I hate pulling out. I hate everything about motorway driving. And I’ve been driving for 36 years.

l don’t trust other drivers to behave safely.

Sounds like you're doing it wrong. If you're not comfortable in the fast lane, you don't have to go into it. You won't be hassled to move lanes if you're already in the inside lane, and if someone pulls in front of you it's easy enough to drop back. Yes, someone might come up uncomfortably close behind you but that happens on any sort of road. If you don't trust other drivers to drive safely, surely the same equally applies on other roads - where there is more danger of people not stopping at junctions, pulling out of parking places without looking, to say nothing of the potential presence of pedestrians and bikes on the roads.

KendrickLamaze · 24/10/2022 09:14

In addition to my previous comment, the best thing you can do is keep a safe distance from the car in front. Give yourself enough time to react to anything! That stands on every road.

TenoringBehind · 24/10/2022 09:17

Longer term I think you should try and do it because it will make life so much easier for you and open up so many possibilities on where you can go.

However, if it’s for a nice weekend away and happening soon then I think you should get the train. Otherwise you’ll be worrying about it between now and then, and spend your time away worrying about making the return journey.

fwiw, I think motorways are far and away the easiest driving you can do, provided you keep your wits about you and always look 2 or more cars ahead. Urban driving terrifies me but that’s because I almost never have to do it.

b8tes7sw · 24/10/2022 09:22

Book a couple of hours motorway lessons or stick to A roads.

RoseMartha · 24/10/2022 09:25

I hate it too. I have made it like a mental block of fear in my head. My advice is to go as early as possible so there is less traffic.

Also have sat nav on your phone if not available feature of your car. When I used this earlier in the year it was really helpful as it told me to move lanes when the roads was splitting off into different directions.

Ask dp if he can see a car to double check when merging in case car is in your blind spot.

Lastly I have learned the best way to overcome the fear of motorways and merging is to start doing it.

Mardyface · 24/10/2022 09:25

I'm torn between saying just do it because it can't be as bad as you're expecting -especially if you can do A road slip lanes - and give yourself a relaxing holiday by not having to worry about it. Presumably you'll have to drive BACK from the airport and will spend your holiday worrying about it.

You do need to just do it at some point.

Seeline · 24/10/2022 09:37

If it's the M25 you need to use, find an alternative route. It's not ideal as your first experience.

You can't stay in the left hand lane as it usually acts as the exit lane at most junctions. There are usually two lanes of solid HGV traffic, who won't move to let you in or out, but indicate to pull out to overtake at the same time as starting the manoeuvre regardless of whether there is space.

You frequently have to stop on slip roads when joing because the traffic on the motorway is stationary or there isn't any space to join. There are even traffic lights on some slip roads which force you to stop.

Original poster
Isitfine · 24/10/2022 09:43

I’m going to just drive to grandparents and then train to the airport as think that’s too much for my first time on motorway. I’m going to just do it, I’ve done a roads plenty of times but if I’m too nervous by the time I’m at the wheel I’ll do the A roads route and get a lesson when I’m back.
thanks everyone

OP posts:
BogRollBOGOF · 24/10/2022 09:50

Long term, motorway tuition is a great idea. I did Pass Plus on passing my test and 6 hours of experience being guided around some of the busiest part of the motorway network was invaluable.

There are good driving tutition videos on youtube.

If you're used to graded junctions on a duel carriageway, a motorway is a bigger version.

  • use your mirrors, get up to the flow of traffic. There is usually enough gap to slide in to.
  • keep left unless over taking. After passing, check that you can see the passed vehicle in your mirrors before pulling in; this ensures that they still have a stopping distance.
  • keep with the flow of traffic
  • know which junction you need, and where you're going when you turn off
Original poster
Isitfine · 24/10/2022 17:15

Just to update - I did it! And it was okay! Feeling proud of myself for doing it

OP posts:
Mardyface · 24/10/2022 17:23

Yeah! Well done. You have conquered something that was hindering you!

ParisTrip · 24/10/2022 17:46

Well done! 👏
Enjoy your break.

RedHelenB · 24/10/2022 17:51

Well done, a sensible compromise and next time you can go all the way to the airport.

RandomMess · 24/10/2022 17:52

Well done!! The motorway isn't so different to a large busy dual carriageway and some are actually easier and safer to navigate.

Rubyuesaini · 24/10/2022 17:55

A massive well done. I think motorways are easier, no cyclists, no pedestrians, no traffic lights. My SIL quit her job as the office moved location and she couldn't face driving on the motorway to get there. I wish she had just done it with a driving instructor to show her how easy it was. At this point she had been driving for 10 years. So well done to you for just doing it.