Scared of motorway - what shall I do?

[Isitfine]

Going on holiday and my partner doesn’t drive so I’m the driver. I’ve only been driving a year and because I was pregnant didn’t drive much and haven’t gone on the motorway yet.

Going away for two nights and leaving baby with grandparents who live in Greater London.
we could get the train but would mean lugging all her stuff and there’s quite a few changes, or I could drive to grandparents which would take half the time near enough but the only thing is I need to go on motorway for 40 miles which I’ve never done and I’m petrified.
But it would be a lot easier.

No chance to practice, I’ve left it too late. Do I just do it or get the train? Any advice to make me less scared?

After not driving for many years I’m also nervous of motorway driving on my own, and avoided it for years. one thing that really helped was watching YouTube motorway driving tutorials, I can’t remember the name of the videos but the ones I watched talked through joining a slip road and judging speed, a refresher on what the different signs mean ie lanes joining and what to do in the event of a breakdown. Hope that helps!

If you're being hassled to move lanes you're probably in the wrong lane. Unless you are meaningfully overtaking you should be as far left as possible. So many cars drive in the middle and outside lane when they're not meaningfully overtaking.

If you're being hassled to move lanes you're probably in the wrong lane

Im not sure this is true. It’s dickheads in the fast land wanting to go 90 miles per hour that I’m talking about.

Motorway driving is actually easier than all the manoeuvres needed on A and B roads.

Once you're on it's simply a large dual carriageway.

Joining from the sliproad needs you to just make sure you can see approaching traffic and drive at a speed to safely join when there's a gap.

A motorway lesson would have been ideal but it's too late now. I'm assuming there's some driving tutorials you could watch about joining motorways on YouTube. A little while spent watching those could give you some tips and boost your confidence.

Motorways are the easiest to drove on, straight roads and you can't go wrong as you can only exit left on junctions. The hardest bit is getting onto them.

And that's the issue, it's not a fast lane it's an overtaking lane. Once you've overtaken move left and you won't get hassled. Sometimes those cars doing 90 are police, when I did my blue light training we were in plain cars, you are trained to drive fast and cars driving correctly in front should move over. If are car behind you wants to overtake, just move left. It's not your job to police others speeds. The most accidents are caused by people driving in wrong lanes causing recklessness by other frustrated drivers.

I’m not sure that the posters saying how much they hate motorway driving are helping the OP much right now!
OP, it’s understandable that you’re anxious with the prospect of something new
If you can, look for a non motorway route, that sounds like the most sensible option, given your anxiety
If you do take the motorway option, I promise it won’t be as bad as you’re imagining. Enlist your partner to help you, you’re definitely driving at the right time, avoiding rush hours. In all of my many years of driving, I’ve never had an issue joining a motorway - and I’ve done lots and lots of motorway driving
Take your time, don’t over think it, allow a decent distance between you and the car in front and keep up with the flow of traffic.

In the longer term, maybe look for a reassuring instructor to give you some motorway driving lessons ❤️

I know it’s an overtaking lane. Like I’m going to spend any length of time on a fast lane!

But when you are overtaking and it’s a constant stream of traffic in the middle lane, you still get dickheads flashing you.

Also. I think people may not be comparing like with like. I drive on the M1 and the M62. They are just 3 lanes of fast moving solid traffic. Like 90mph traffic jams.

When I started driving I was SO NERVOUS. I worried what other drivers thought of me and how I was driving. I worried about not knowing where I was going and it stopped me going places and doing things. I'd had enough so I started pep talking to myself saying fuck it, fuck them, fuck everyone else. Fuck what anyone thinks, fuck if I take a wrong turn, honestly it changed my life. (Sorry for the repeated profanity) but honestly I told myself why do I worry so much. I drive safely, I know how to drive so can be confident. If I took a wrong turn I would pull over and get my route together again and take my time. Honestly, go for it. Don't let fear hold you back! You won't regret it

Apologies if I missed, but can't you go on local roads even if it's a bit longer? Set up your phone/satnav with the no motorway option.

There are always strong opinions on MN about joining the motorway. The slip roads are long enough to get up to speed , indicate and move into a gap.

No one can be hassling you to move lanes if you stay in the inside lane. That's what I would advise to nervous drivers.

But if you just stay on the inside lane you get stuck behind lorries.

Even l, who am terrified need to overtake sometimes.

You will be fine, when I first learned to drive I avoided motorways for the first couple of years but they are my preferred option now. No pedestrians/cyclists to worry about and if you want you can sit in the inside lane and people can overtake, instead of stressing about a queue of traffic behind you on an A road. They are often better signed/marked/lit than other roads too.

But on A roads you can get stuck behind tractors and have to move onto the opposite side of the road to overtake, which IMO is worse.

I like your username@MichaelFabricantWig 😁

Why thank you 😊

I personally hate motorways , the speed and getting hemmed in by trucks 😩 I wish I was more confident though as taking A roads takes forever !

Go on the A roads. I go on the motorway, don't like it but it a necessity. Practice does increase confidence but I do think that if u are anxious about it you should stick.to A roads until you get the opportunity to build up your confidence.

Its not often, but it may need to happen sometimes such as very short slips, it depends how heavy and close the traffic is oncoming.

Traffic doesnt move out of the way and isnt expected to, thats incorrect advice

Isle of Wight?

You know what OP? I’d just go on the train. Or better still, a bus.
You’re on holiday- if worry over driving is going to cloud your trip, just do what’s less stressful ☺️

No, other traffic oncoming and already on the road have priority, joiners have to slot in or stop and go

You are right. It worries me when advice is bandied around saying you don't need to stop, or can't stop. It's true that IDEALLY you wouldn't stop on a slip road but actually it is dangerous to just expect to never have to. I've had to a few times. It may depend a bit on what motorway you go on to and how busy it is - where I live there is a slip road that is notoriously bad for getting on the motorway- the motorway at that point is always rammed and cars can't easily move over into the next lane. It is not uncommon for a line of cars to be trying to get off the slip road. Obviously use common sense and if you CAN safely get onto the motorway without stopping (which is obviously usually the case) then DO, but remember that cars in the lane have the priority. I was much much less nervous about driving on motorways when my husband told me it is absolutely fine (and sensible!) to stop on the slip road of ypu can't get onto the motorway safely.

After not driving for many years I’m also nervous of motorway driving on my own, and avoided it for years. one thing that really helped was watching YouTube motorway driving tutorials, I can’t remember the name of the videos but the ones I watched talked through joining a slip road and judging speed, a refresher on what the different signs mean ie lanes joining and what to do in the event of a breakdown. Hope that helps

Best advice on the thread!

This thread is worrying. So many anxious drivers, who really shouldn't be driving if you are that anxious. At least try and and do something to address it. It's not fair on the rest of the drivers who are competent and not anxious.