Things you can never say out loud in real life as you'll hurt the feelings of someone you like....

[hatetheplayernotthegame]

...stop buying puppies from breeders FFS.

So sick of people popping up with the latest - inevitably moustachiod dull as fuck doodle - puppy that they've bought from some back yard breeder.

I love dogs. The people who do this never seem to really like dogs much, if they did they'd consider adopting one of the gazillions dumpbed post-lockdown (bought by moustachio-doodle loving twats just like them).

You are completely dominated by your toxic mother and you simply cannot see that she winds you up to fall out with all the people who she thinks may become your friend simply to ensure she is not left alone.

You have no other family, and you worship her. Your life is stifled by her babying ways and at 49 you are still a virgin and work part-time as that is all she will allow. As a daughter, you believe she can do no wrong.

When you converse with others you say 'Mum & I ' think.......as if you were a couple. As a former friend, I never wanted to hear her opinions, just yours. Sadly, you actually now don't have any opinions of your own as you have been subsumed by hers. Toxic helicopter parenting.

The end result is that you now have no friends and when she is gone ( which, as she is in her late 70's cannot be too far in the future) you will be alone.......which I find unbearably sad. I have tried very, very gently to warn you but to no avail.

You aren’t single because of your disability. You’re single because you’re chasing after stunning girls and you don’t have the personality or the looks to interest them. You’re a nice enough bloke but my God, you’re a drip and you’re really bloody boring. Stop thinking about all the things you want from a girlfriend and start working on having something to offer a woman.

I don’t contact you as much as I used to because we can have a three hour conversation and not talk about anything but you. I can’t be bothered.

I love you. You’re like my sister. But you’ve gone through your life being made to feel like you’re not good enough and that’s just not the case. You’re bloody brilliant. You don’t have to put up with his shit and if you had any self esteem, you’d see that.

Oh perfect.
I think I precis too much as assume my contribution is not interesting.

Applies in many situations.
I have a friend who can visit for hours and we never get around to my news.

I've ditched friends for not listening or droning on only about their perfect lives / children / money house / car s / holidays
Life is short !

You have caused no end of trouble in our family, you’re a narcissist with no empathy whatsoever.
Turned my nephew against his family, but he’s as spineless as you are toxic, he’s a typical enabler, keeps quiet to keep the peace. He turned a blind eye with to you openly cheating on him for years, the money the other man shelled out for your fake breasts would have been better spent on your face. But nephew is an adult. He could have walked away so I have no sympathy for him.

The saddest thing is you turned the daughter you had with him into another version of you. She listened to your lies and believed every word you said about our family, a family who welcomed you but your jealousy of us and our close relationships was beyond your comprehension so you set out to destroy us.
You caused my beloved sister no end of heartache, over many years with your lies, violence and manipulation, Being the forgiving and wonderful person she was, she forgave you countless times until you and your daughter came at her, ranting and raving on the day she was going for radiotherapy treatment. A defenceless woman with terminal cancer backed into a corner by two women bigger and stronger than she was.
Than God her neighbour heard and rescued her.
You couldn’t even leave her in peace when she was dead, you turning up at the funeral home demanding to see her body..we forewarned the funeral directors that you’d turn up and they wouldn’t let you in.
That must have killed you, being thwarted for once.

You did not do a good job of raising us despite the fact you think you were some sort of perfect mother. Yes outwardly we behaved well, too well - because we were terrified. but you didn't look after our emotional well being. You didn't even realise we had emotional needs. Our home was sad, toxic and chaotic. So stop giving us your terrible parenting advice. I want to do the exact opposite of what you did. I don't want to raise little robots. I want kids who are happy, understand themselves, can show emotion so they're not crippled with anxiety as adults and can thrive. If that means they are what you perceive as naughty then I couldn't give a hoot.

I'm sorry your husband turned out to be a cheating, lying bastard, really I am, but it's, what, 7 years since you split up now isn't it? And he is still your main topic of conversation every time we meet up. Our group of friends is running out of sympathy now sorry. In fact I've heard a few say that they are starting to see his point of view. We've offered emotional support and practical advice til we are blue in the face but you don't take any of it on board at all. You need to stop telling us how you're over him and moving on and actually do it! * *

B, you're my best friend, you've been there for me through thick and thin and are everything a good friend should be. But dear god above, your kids have disgusting table manners and you just don't see it! And they're both a bit over indulged if we're being honest. But you know what, you can afford it and yes I'm a little bit jealous. But please please stop them both chewing with their mouths wide open and taking me than their fair share before anyone else has a chance (including you!) and then just leaving most of it on their plate. They're horrible to be around at a meal and I hate watching them eat when we go to each others houses!

Should probably get the title changed to:

Things you can never say out loud in real life to people you absolutely despise because you don't want to make a scene.

God, that was cathartic.

We all paid good money to listen to that speaker (a world-renowned expert), we did not want to listen to you interrupting him every minute to quiz him about one of your own pet theories and jabbering on endlessly. Some of the rest of us would have liked to have asked the expert questions too if we'd had the opportunity, but were unable to get a word in edgeways. Just STFU.

To my father in law. I know about you punishing my husband when he was a child by beating him with a belt. I cried when I found out, as I couldn’t get how any parent could do that to their own child.

Now I’m finding it incredibly hard to listen to the shit you talk about your fantastic Brexit that has fucked things up for your own grandchildren, and made life at work very hard for my husband. I hate the fact you think you’re in charge of an entire adult family for the reason you’re the elderly patriarch. I hate your uneducated droning on when the only source of news you get is the Daily Mail, and you tell me to do my homework when I don’t agree. I hate the fact your family close down and the light dulls from their eyes when you speak.

You’re a fucking horrible bully, and rather than try to explain gently when certain things have happened I’d like to tell you you’re a total cunt and should fuck off. But I think your son will get there again and tell you exactly that, and it’ll be the last time we see you.

Glad my gut feeling stopped me from relying on you for too much childcare, you vicious old bastard.

And to my lovely friend.

Life crapped on you when your husband left you for a supposed mate of yours, and that sucks. I know your self esteem is on the floor but please, please try to see your new relationship with my ex friend - dumped for him being a misogynist - is only going to make it worst. I know you love caring for people and are really tolerant, but it becomes a failing when it’s going to affect you so badly.

You’re worth way more and can get it if that vain, manchild prick isn’t in the way.

You are one of my closest friends and I know you would do anything for me but please, please stop dominating every conversation and talking about yourself all the time. You need to let other people talk too. One on one it's not too bad but you are awful if we are in a group.

Applies to several people, but with similar traits.

I know you can't help it but sometimes you exhaust me. I have to choose my words so carefully to allow you to understand what I mean, and to not confuse or upset you. You assume I know what all your acronyms and half-explanations mean, but I don't, and if I ask, you seem as though you're annoyed that I don't have a photographic memory for all this stuff.
Plus, when you randomly change things or move the goalposts and then tell me a week or so later (or currently, having not yet told me), then I can't be the help and support you need me to be.
This is why I sometimes go quiet, or tell you I'm tired. I can't say that your condition(s) wear me down as much as they do you.

Friend's judgy parents - It's so hard to watch your only daughter struggling physically and financially on her own with a disability, while you sit on a big pile of money with no intention of helping her. She's has never asked you for a thing and has helped you and many other people out, yet you still don't trust her. You intend to leave her everything anyway, why not make her life easier now and give her even a little bit of relief from the constant worry of keeping a roof over her head?

I love a two way conversation, but it's rare to find friends or relatives who can do this
My sil is the same too ! All about her

Your lips look ridiculous.

I really don't want to host you at my house for two weeks next autumn for the UK leg of your trip to Europe. Why would you assume I would? Don't you realise that your lovely free catch up with family is just more of the same old, same old for me, but now with extra shopping, cooking and cleaning? So instead we will meet you somewhere lovely in France and we can split the costs more evenly.

I have actually said a watered-down version of this to the people concerned, and it has worked! I don't know if their feelings are hurt or not, and I am getting too old to care.

Stop importing stray rescued dogs from Eastern Europe, it’s a scam to get £300 for a mongrel bred to sell to the gullible. Mafia say it’s more lucrative than drug dealing. Plenty of good work your £300 could do in this country.

Aw 🥹💕

This annoys me. I know a few people who have paid or "donated" towards this.

Stop importing stray rescued dogs from Eastern Europe, it’s a scam to get £300 for a mongrel bred to sell to the gullible. Mafia say it’s more lucrative than drug dealing. Plenty of good work your £300 could do in this country.*
This annoys me. I know a few people who have paid or "donated" towards this.*

They aren't all scams you know. There is a very real problem with stray dogs in Romania and also ill treatment of dogs generally. I've seen it in person. You do have to be very careful with which rescue you use but some are legitimate and I've helped with one that was.(U.K run)

On that note. This is generic rather than specific. Get your dogs neutered! I hate this current trend for pet owners not neutering dogs or doing it so late that the poor bitch gets "accidentally" pregnant or their male impregnates a bitch or several. No, your dog(or cat) does not need to experience being a Mother. You're just doing it for your own selfish reasons.

I’m sorry if I’m the person who talks endlessly about dc  I am trying really hard, but I’ve not necessarily achieved much the last few years due to ill health, not currently working to have that to talk about. So dc have been my life, and I’m genuinely very proud of them. However I’m making a real effort, so please bear with me!

MrsRinaDecker I sincerely hope that things get better for you and I'm sure that you have every reason to speak so proudly and often of your dc. There are much worse things you could do.

I will join you in this feeling, as I'm in the same situation. Bumped into ex-friend in Aldi (ex-friend who was verging on psychopathic and tried to turn our whole friendship group against me) and couldn't help but feel very gloaty 😶