Who taught you feminine hygiene?

[Chloefairydust]

Inspired by another thread a poster started about concern over feeling grubby as a child, it got me thinking. (And yes I was definitely a grubby child looking back, which btw no one should have to feel ashamed of, as a child your dependent on your parents for care)

Growing up I was never really taught any kind of feminine hygiene. As a young child I would often feel uncomfortable down there from lack of hygiene and I think I had a few issues with UTIs if I remember right.

I kind of taught myself the hard way as I got older, like not knowing that I shouldn’t be using normal soaps on intimate skin, and not having anyone to explain tampons properly as a teenager, or even hair removal.

I never really felt comfortable asking my mum about these things, I felt it was a bit taboo and just not something to talk about. I don’t have any children, but always thought to myself if I was to have a daughter. I would talk openly about these things, and not make her feel ashamed.

So who you taught you feminine hygiene? Did you have to teach yourself like I did? And if you have a daughter do you feel comfortable talking about these things with her?

Same as me, I always had access to towels (and the dreaded belt!!!!), but we did pretty much fathom it out ourselves. That said, my dear mum was a dab hand (literally) at getting stains out (soda crystals and cold water if I recall).

Make sure to discuss it with him! If he’s asked say why it’s off the table. And if you’ve had kids, a traumatic birth or previous birth injury the risk will be increased and I’m sure he will be understanding. If he isn’t you have different issues to contend with.

fwiw I’ve had many conversations with men who aren’t partners about why women don’t and shouldn’t engage in it and they’ve certainly changed their tune with regards to it when they know the risks and potential outcomes from injury.

theres this pervasive idea that women who don’t want to are prudes and the constant attacks on anyone ‘vanilla’ really gets on my nerves and I do challenge it wherever I come across.

some women love it, know the risks and will happily carry on. Informed choice and all that. We just need to teach men this too.

I was raised with a bath each evening so that bit was ok. I knew about periods but I was left to get on with it by my DM. If I was upset about them or distressed she just was not interested. I knew all about hers though. My DAunt told me about tampons and my DF was supportive.

I too learnt from magazines and friends.

I think it’s porn that makes this an almost expected sexual act for women to do. We have included things like a small but plug and light play in that area before as a kind of foreplay. But never took it further than that. To be honest I had never even heard of the risks before 😮

because it wasn’t as common for women to engage in it like men have done, though even a lot of gay men don’t do it, and there just wasn’t enough data.

we all know womens issues are often just dismissed. Any abdominal/bowel/vaginal area pain ‘normal’ or misdiagnosis such as IBS.

I wonder if the high rate of IBS diagnosis in women has masked some of the incontinence issues caused by it?

yes it’s porn influence. I agree there. It is expected by almost every man. And there’s nothing wrong with experimenting, trying new things out but informed and all that.

Men have to be too aware of what damage their desire to put their penis in various places can cause. It’d probably dampen a lot of the Curiosity.

School and a bit of DM I think. In my 40’s I’m still learning though - in the loos at work the other day I noticed a colleague (not British born) filling up a small 500ml type water bottle with warm water before she went in to the cubicle. I though what I good idea that was rather than just using tissue (I’m assuming it was her time of the month)

I think other cultures use a bidet after using the toilet don’t they? … When you think about it though this isn’t a bad idea. I don’t think using toilet paper alone really cleans that well.

My mum taught me nothing at all. We had sex ed at the end of primary school, so got taught about periods etc, but nothing at all from my mum. When my periods did start, she gave me a pad and said to flush them down the toilet when I change them.
Nothing about deodorant, or wiping myself properly. I got bullied in school for having hairy legs. I thought I was a freak, yet I didn't know shaving was an option.

@Redqueenheart hair removal was specifically mentioned. I agree it's nothing to do with hygiene